At the end of the call, Nicole hands me her phone again. “I need to cancel the meeting I have tomorrow. And dad thinks I should delay my flight home, just until I’ve had a few days without any symptoms. What do you think?”
“I think that sounds like the right thing to do.”
“You don’t have to stay,” Nicole says, her cheeks pinking and her eyes flicking to the corner of the room. “You must have lots of important things to do.”
“There’s nothing more important than this.”
She blinks slowly, squeezing my hand gently. “When I woke up at the hotel, I thought you'd gone. I thought that I was never going to see you again."
"Oh baby, I just went down to the bar. I left my suitcase in the closet.”
"I didn't see it." Nicole rubs her face with her free hand in a way that seems frustrated. I can't stand to see her upset, knowing it's my fault. I should have left a note, but she was sleeping so deeply it didn't seem necessary. For all her reassuring confidence, Nicole is as uncertain about us as I am. If this is going to work between us, we will have to work hard to build trust.
Nicole sighs. "Oh, god. I feel so stupid."
"Don't, okay. It's me that should feel like an asshole. It's not like I've got the best track record with you, but I want to change that. I'm never going to walk out as I did in London. I promise, Nicole. I know I have a lot to prove, and I will, but I need you to believe in me, okay? We need to learn to trust each other."
She looks at me, eyes wide and fearful. "I want to, but it’s all hard for me too."
"How about this then," I say, thinking on the fly, knowing I have to find a way for us to be together. "I’ll stay with you until you feel well enough to travel home, then I’ll travel with you. I need to make sure you get back okay. And after that, we’ll make time to see each other. I can send my plane for you…or I’ll travel. We’ll make it work. We can speak every day and see what happens. If you think it's not working, you tell me, and if I think the same, I'll tell you. We promise to be honest about everything, every step of the way. I want to see you, Nicole. I want us to spend time with each other so we can find out if this thing we started can be something more."
"That's what you want?" she asks.
"Yeah, it's what I want. What do you want?"
"That. What you said." She smiles a small smile, and I lean over to kiss her. She grasps the back of my neck to hold me close and my heart seems to swell in my chest.
God, I care for this woman. I want to give her everything that she needs.
Everything she wants. Everything I am.
I want to shake off my past and be the man that she’s hoping I am. I never want to make her wait or make her guess again.
I call Sandrine to organize us a car back to the hotel. Nicole walks tentatively as though she’s afraid she’ll get sick again any minute. In the room, she falls asleep in seconds, but I cannot.
I stay away for as long as I can, listening to the soft sounds of her breathing, watching over her as she slides into her dreams. I watch over her because she’s precious to me. Accepting that isn’t as hard as it was yesterday. Maybe it’ll get easier with each day. I hope so because for the first time in a very long time I’ve found someone whose hand I want to hold and whose heart I want to protect. Someone who I feel is worth giving my trust to.
I stroke her hair back from her face, and marvel at how a chance meeting with a stranger has the power to change a person…has the power to change a life.
I’m going to give this my all because lying next to Nicole feels like home.30
NICOLEI’m sitting on a high stool in a swanky London bar that’s filled with city types in their sharp suits and designer watches, flashing the cash for bottles of champagne and expensive spirits. I’m early, but I’ve always been a punctual person. Lateness stresses me out, and that’s not what tonight is about.
The barman fixes me a whiskey on the rocks, sliding it over with a lingering smile. I’ve made a lot of effort with my appearance tonight. I smile back, but fleetingly, not wanting him to get the wrong idea. I’m looking for a stranger tonight, but he isn’t the one.
There’s music playing, something sexy and upbeat that makes me want to dance. I’ve got my highest heels on, though, so that’s not really an option, and anyway, it’s not that kind of place.