Great Sass (Providence Family Ties 1) - Page 39
Holding it closer to her face, she read through the instructions printed in a font suitable for an ant and nodded. “Yeah, it says to stir thoroughly after taking it out. There’s even a warning that says the center of it will be hotter than the outside, so to stir first before putting it in for any extra time.”
Of course it fucking did. In size .0004 font, it gave warnings.
Chewing the inside of her lip, Ari looked from the pot to my crotch. “So, what are we looking at here? Did you drop it?”
Shuffling over to sit on the opposite of my body to Beau, Bonnie picked my hand up. “Don’t worry, we’ll help you. I once did something like this, but it ended up going on the towel, which stuck to my ass. It made it easier to do, so don’t panic.”
Licking my lips, I tried to find comfort in her normally soothing presence, but ironically I couldn’t find a damn shred of it tonight. “Oh, there’s a lot to worry about. My thigh’s stuck to my vagina, and I’ve got a whole pot of overcooked wax sealing it shut.”
All three of them sucked in a breath and looked at each other. “Maybe we should take her to the hospital?” Ari suggested. “I don’t think Parker has anything that’ll knock her out deep enough to get this off.”
“No hospital,” I screeched, just picturing the likes of the hottie Doctor Chris inspecting my new wax feature. “I just need you to get it off me.”
“What about if we put you in the shower?” Beau asked hopefully. “We’ll get some dish soap, and you can just wash it off.”
“I don’t think that’ll work,” Bonnie whispered, looking at the screen of her phone. “There’s a lot of negative reviews for this one saying that it doesn’t wash off and that the only thing people found that got rid of the excess was hydrogen peroxide.”
How the hell does that cut through wax? I wasn’t a scientist or anything medical, but hydrogen peroxide on cooter wax?
Rubbing the back of her neck, Beau looked nervously at the three of us. “We’re going to have to pull it off.” Then, settling on Ari, who was sitting just above my head, she ordered, “Swap places with me, you do it.”
“Why me? I don’t know anything about stuff like this.”
Before they could get into a debate, though, Bonnie, God love her, threw a pair of gloves at Ari. “Just follow the instructions on the tub. The longer it’s on there, the more anxious she’s getting, and you two arguing isn’t going to help. It’s also probably going to get the men's attention—” men? “—and that’s the last thing she needs. Put yourself in Sadie’s shoes right now.”
Reaching up weakly, I patted the side of her face. “Bless you, Bonnie, bless you.”
There was some shuffling and rustling beside me, but I figured that because it worked better for me when I had an injection or blood test not to look at the person doing it, that’s what I’d do now.
“Here, take the box and read me the instructions,” Ari huffed.
The sound of snapping was hopefully her putting on gloves and not chunks of my cooch coming off.
“Okay, it says to spread the wax with the spatula in a fine line. Then you need to leave it for sixty seconds, test it, blah, blah, blah,” Beau muttered. “Ah, okay, so go to the bottom of the strip, pick at the end to raise enough of it to pinch, then pull the skin taught with your other hand, and pull the wax up quickly toward it.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Ari look down at my crotch and frown. “It’s all one big piece, though. I don’t know if I can get an edge.”
“I’ve got a manicure kit in my purse that has small nail scissors in it,” Bonnie offered. “You could carefully make a line through the wax and split it into sections.”
So, that’s what they did, painstakingly using the sharpest point of the smallest scissors I’d ever seen to get through the wax and separate it into strips. When they got to the thigh that was still stuck against it, Beau frowned down at me.
“I wouldn’t have thought normally it would be that hard to separate your leg from…” she broke off and nodded at the area. “I don’t think you should use this one again.”
“Unless it does a good job. I mean, beauty isn’t pain-free,” Ari shrugged.
Then I felt a gentle hand hold my thigh as a weird tugging sensation started in the area itself. “I’ll just cut through the wax to separate them,” Bonnie explained.
And she did. It only took about five minutes, and then my leg was free. It was an emotional moment, but definitely not as emotional as what followed.
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