Off Course (Off 4)

Lying on his side, he hands it to me. "Put it on."

There's my controlling Cillian, and his command causes me to shiver. I slowly roll it on his length, taking my time and squeezing him when I'm done. He lets out a soft moan before pushing me on my back and covering me again.

He enters me slowly while his face hovers over me, his eyes boring into mine. He moves with care and a calmness I didn't know he possessed. It makes my heart swell just a little, wondering if this man is capable of something more.

He moves inside of me, all the while staring into my eyes. I'm helpless to look away, although I have to fight the urge to close my eyes every time he hits me deep. Our breaths come out a little louder, punctuated every so often by a groan from one of us. We build up higher, both on the same path, and when I feel myself start to tighten around him, he links our hands together and kisses me lightly on the mouth. His lips stay there, resting softly against mine, as he starts to climax, and I follow right behind him.

When our bodies finally stop shuddering from pleasure, Cillian kisses me again. "Give me just a second, okay?"

I nod and he leaves the bed, walking to the bathroom. He's back within a few moments and crawls back in bed, drawing me into his arms. Placing his lips on my forehead, he murmurs, "My cailin alainn."

"What does that mean...you keep saying it to me?"

He runs his tongue over my lower lip. "It's Gaelic for 'beautiful girl'."

"Oh," I say, warmed by the endearment. "You make it sound so lovely."

"Lovely sentiment for a lovely girl."

I stroke his chest. "I don't know if I can handle sweet and cuddly Cillian. It's a bit weird."

Cillian just grins at me. "You handle me just fine, Renner. Much better than I deserve half the time."

I'm silent for a moment, still basking in the amazingly sweet sex we just had, and also relishing this new, softer Cillian. I know it's not his truly deep nature, but he's not faking this. He definitely has a gentleness buried underneath the controlling, sexy, rock-star personality.

"What do you need from me?"

He looks at me with surprise. "What do you mean?"

"Well," I say carefully. "I don't think things are going to be easy with Maeve. I offered to step back but you said that's not an option. What role do you want me to play?"

Cillian runs his finger along my jaw, considering my request. "I don't want you to play a role. I just want you to be you. I want us to continue doing exactly what we're doing."

"Status quo, huh?"

"Well," he says deviously. "I wouldn't mind if we add a little more sex to the mixture."

His hand comes up to my breast and he tweaks a nipple. Pleasure courses through my blood.

I jab him in the ribs. "You're rotten."

"Every fucking day, baby. Every fucking day."

Then he kisses me again and I let myself get lost.

***

It was bound to happen--I realize that now. After the countless times Cady has barged into my flat unannounced, it was bound to happen while Cillian was here. And this time, it just so happened while we were eating naked pizza in my kitchen.

"Hey, Renner... I have a need to do some shopping. Get your lazy ass in gear and let's go."

I screamed at her invasion, partly scared out of my wits when the door flew open and partly mortified to be standing there naked while Cillian was feeding me a bite of pizza. I jumped behind Cillian, who didn't even have the grace to be embarrassed, facing Cady.

She at least slammed her eyes shut and spun around so fast I'm surprised she didn't get dizzy and fall over.

"Oh, fuck," she said. "What the fuck are you two doing?"

Her voice is filled with bewilderment and an underlying hint of disgust.

"Come on, Cady," Cillian says in a teasing manner. "You know exactly what I'm doing to lovely Renner here."

I jab him in the ribs with my finger and he yelps.

"Cady, just give us a second to get dressed."

Grabbing Cillian's hand, I drag him back to my bedroom. As soon as the door is closed, the idiot grabs me in his arms and tries to kiss me.

"What are you doing?" I say in exasperation as I push him away. "Get dressed so we can go smooth this over."

He grins at me but at least picks up his jeans and slips them on. "Why are you so bent out of shape? There's nothing to smooth over."

Well, that's true. We've done nothing wrong, but Cady's going to be pissed I hadn't told her about this.

I whip on a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt, and head back out to the living room, assuming Cillian will follow. When she hears me, she turns around, her face still red. I glance behind me and see Cillian step back into the kitchen, picking up a slice a pizza to resume eating.

Cady leans in close to me to whisper. "Sorry for barging in like that...I never would have if I knew you'd be doing the naked tango with Cillian. How long has this been going on?"

"Not long. Are you mad at me?"

She gives me a light punch, still whispering. "Yes... I'm mad. Mad that you didn't tell me, not mad that you're... doing it with him." That last part had her wrinkling her nose up.

I shoot her a grin and decide to freak her out even more. Lowering my voice conspiratorially, I say, "Gosh, Cady... he's an animal in the sack. You should see this thing he does with his tongue--"

"Stop it," she practically screeches. "I don't want to hear what happens in bed between my cousin and my almost-brother."

I chuckle and give her a quick hug. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. It all happened so fast and it's a bit new."

"But you're happy with him?" I can see the doubt on her face.

"Don't worry about me. We're both having fun right now, that's all."

Cady glances past me into the kitchen to sneak a peek at Cillian. Then she looks back at me. "His tongue, you say?"

Nodding my head slowly up and down I tell her, "You can't imagine how good that piercing he has feels."

Her face goes red but she starts giggling. "I'm sure Teagan will want more details than I do. But right now... I'm going to get out of your hair so you can go back to your naked pizza party."

Apparently, we weren't whispering as low as we thought we were because Cillian calls out, "Good, because you weren't invited."

Cady sticks her tongue out at Cillian and then gives me a quick hug. After the door closes behind her, Cillian holds a slice of pizza up. "Get back in here and eat. And make sure you get rid of your clothes first."

CHAPTER 16

Cillian

"So, is this like an intervention or something?" Daniel asks.

"No. Nothing like that. I just think we need to make sure Maeve knows we're all together on this." I stand up from my kitchen table and get a bottle of water from my refrigerator.

We're at my apartment, waiting for Maeve to show up for a band meeting. I'd asked Sean and Daniel to meet me here a bit early so we could discuss it in more detail. I thought I had made clear though, what this was about. Apparently, Daniel hadn't been listening to me.

"So, we're going to kick her out of the band if what? She starts drinking again?"

I sigh with frustration and confusion. "Yes. No. I don't know, Daniel. I just think she needs to understand that we want her to take this seriously. That the future of the band rests on her ability to get sober."

Daniel leans back in his chair, putting his boots on my table. "I don't see what the problem is. So Maeve likes to party a bit. Who doesn't?"

As I head back to my chair, I swat Daniel's feet off my table. "It's more complicated than that."

"Seriously, dude," Sean pipes in. "You've got to admit, she takes it to the extreme. Plus, she tried to kill herself."

Daniel shakes his head. "I don't think she meant to kill herself. Maeve loves life too much. She did it for the attention. Cillian's attention to be specific."

I sigh, rubbing my temples. This was so not how I thought I'd be spending my Saturday night. I'd give anything right now j

ust to go sit in The Hibernian and watch Renner work.

Sean is twirling his pencil in his hands as he talks. "It doesn't matter why she did it. The point is--she did it. And alcohol was involved. She's got a problem, man."

Leaning forward and resting my arms on the table, I look at each of them seriously. "I just want her to know that we are supporting her and will do whatever we can to get her through this. But I want to be clear with her that she has to be sober to stay with us."

"And you're prepared to kick her out if she drinks just one drop of alcohol?" Daniel challenges me.

"If we're all in agreement, then yes."

"I'm in agreement," Sean says.

Daniel's quiet for a minute. "Well, I'm not. That's harsh, dude. If she truly has a problem, then she's bound to fuck up. You want to just turn our backs on her the minute she makes a mistake?"

I stand up again and grab a bottle of aspirin from the counter. Popping two pills, I wash them down with a swallow of water. This headache is getting worse by the moment.