She nods at me uncertainly, but turns and heads back toward her bedroom.
Scratching my head, I walk into the kitchen to find Mac fixing a cup of coffee. She doesn't say anything at first, so I go ahead and pick up my own cup to take a sip. When she finally looks at me, she whispers, "What the fuck, Cal?"
"Is that a pissed 'What the fuck', an incredulous 'What the fuck" or a happy 'What the fuck'?"
Mac's mouth slams shut, her eyebrows draw inward as she thinks about it a moment. Then she smiles big at me. "I think it's a happy 'What the fuck'."
I didn't realize how important that answer was until I let out my own release of pent-up breath and return her smile. "Phew. That makes me feel better."
"How long has this been going on?" she whispers.
"Why are you whispering? We're out now," I say with a grin as I set my cup down. Walking over to the cabinet, I pull out another plate.
"I don't know," she says in a normal tone but still keeping her voice low. "I guess I'm just shocked."
Making myself busy by divvying up the eggs and bacon now among three plates, I tell her, "Since Aaron's birthday party."
"What... you asked her out on a date then?" she says incredulously. Which just proves how well she knows Macy and knows that is not ever the way it would have happened between us.
So I decide to be truthful, put it out there as succinctly as I can, and then I'll let Macy fill in the details later. "We had sex at the party. In the pantry. Twice. Then again in my office after I took her case. Then again in Utah... and well, just again and again."
"Just... wow," she murmurs as she follows me over to the kitchen table where I set the plates of food. "Is that all this is? Just sex."
I want to give her fluff. I want to tell her sure... it's just some amazing fucking going on here. She'd understand, because she knows Macy. But the problem is that Mac knows me too, and she'd never accept that. "It's a bit more for me."
I'm not prepared for the sympathy in Mac's eyes even though I know her heart is as big as they come. "You need to be careful with Macy--"
I quickly cut her off, because I know Macy will be joining us any second. "I promise I won't hurt her."
Mac shakes her head, her lips drawing down sadly. "I know you won't. You're not built that way. I mean you need to be careful. I don't want to see you get hurt either."
I nod at her but before I can say anything, I hear Macy's soft footsteps coming closer. When she walks into the kitchen, just as with every time she comes into my view, I get a little dizzy just from her beauty. She gives me a quick smile, and then crosses over to Mac, where she gives her a light punch on her shoulder as she passes by, heading toward the table. "What's with the breaking and entering of my apartment?"
Macy dressed in a pair of yoga pants and a plain, white t-shirt that hugs her curves well. Her hair is wet and slicked back, and her feet are bare. I want Mac to hurry up and get the hell gone so I can take her back to bed.
"Shouldn't have let me keep the key you gave me when we lived together," Mac says with a grin as she sits down in a chair and pulls a plate of food toward her. Macy takes the chair opposite of her and I choose to stand, my breakfast ignored for the time being.
Mac picks up a fork, takes a mouthful of egg, and chews thoughtfully. Then her nose wrinkles and she swallows hard, pushing the plate away.
"Aren't the eggs any good?" Macy asks with her head tilted to the side.
"Um... no, they're pretty craptastic actually. A little rubbery."
"Guess we'll go out to breakfast," Macy says as she looks toward me. "I thought you said you could cook?"
Shaking my head, I lean a hip against the counter. "Nope. Never said that. Just that I would cook."
"Alright," Mac says as she takes her coffee cup in hand. "Since I'm not eating, why don't you two tell me what's going on?"
I remain silent because first, I already gave Mac the nutshell version and second, because she's looking directly at Macy for an answer.
Macy leans forward in her chair, places an elbow at the table, and gives Mac a conspiratorial grin. It's a grin that I bet those two women have shared countless times in the past. "What can I say...? Cal is a beast in the bed," Macy croons at her. "He's hung like a bull, does amazing things with his tongue, and he--"
"Cut the crap," Mac growls at her best friend. "I don't ever want to know those things about Cal. He's my business partner, for God's sake."
Macy doesn't look in the least bit shamed, but rather entertained. I expect her to keep poking at Mac, but instead, she says, "We're in a relationship. A monogamous one."
I'm startled to hear her say that. Not because the words are shocking, because we agreed early on we'd be monogamous. I guess I'm just so surprised to hear Macy use the word "relationship" as if it were something she'd been saying her whole life.
It startles Mac too because her mouth hangs slightly open. "As in... what, dating exclusively?"
"Well, we just had our very first 'date' last night," Macy says, and she even puts up air quotes when she says the word "date", but it's not with any malice. "But yes... I'm not seeing anyone else."
Macy doesn't need to confirm that I'm not seeing anyone, because she knows Mac well enough and that includes Mac knowing me very well, which includes the absolute fact that I'm a one-woman kind of man.
Then Macy adds on--for my benefit, for Mac's--I'm just not sure. "And I don't want to see anyone else. At all."
I'm not sure what hidden meaning lay within those simple words, but whatever it is, it has an impact on Mac. Her eyes go round with some type of understanding that I don't get, and she whispers the word "Oh," almost like it's a prayer.
I know this isn't the norm... Macy dating.
Being monogamous.
Sharing.
But I almost get a feeling of dark foreboding when I consider the possible meaning of what's transpiring right now.
Macy says she doesn't want to see anyone else.
At all.
Almost as if it was a compulsion before.
Almost as if it was a... sickness?
Almost as if I was a... cure?
Neither woman looks over at me. It's like I'm not even in the room with them. Mac's eyes wide and seeking for more of an explanation, Macy's eyes darkly troubled with the need for approval from her friend.
It's my cue to leave.
"I'm going to go take a shower," I say as I set my cup down. I want to walk over to Macy and kiss her on the forehead. A simple gesture of support and affection, but I'm not sure if she's ready for me to do that in front of her best friend just yet. I very much long for the day when I don't have to calculate the consequences of my every action with this woman, but for now, I can accept it. Because today has been a huge day already and it's not even nine AM yet.
Macy has acknowledged me to her best friend, and although the words weren't exact, she is inferring that I am now important to her.
That's progress in my humble opinion.
Chapter 22
Macy and I decide to hit up a local bakery close to her apartment for breakfast after Mac leaves. She wasn't there long, so I'm not sure how deep of a conversation she and Macy were able to have, but I know before I even got dried off from my shower, Macy was back in the bedroom and pulling me on to the mattress where she did very wicked things with her tongue to me.
Which in turn caused me to reciprocate.
The point being, Macy's face was flushed rosy when we left her apartment, and things just kept getting better when she linked her fingers with mine as we walked the busy Manhattan streets.
I let Macy direct the conversation. While I'm dying of curiosity about what was said between her and Mac, I also know that Macy is such an intensely private person that I don't expect her to fill me in.
Because it's such a beautiful, summer day, we get bagels to go with some coffee and head over to a small park. Sharing a bench, our knees bumping companionably, Macy and I eat our breakfast and warily eye some
pigeons that encroach upon us.
"What are your plans the rest of the day?" she asks me timidly.
So very hesitant, and I know reluctantly, because Macy Carrington has never made plans to spend the day with a man before. I don't want to scare her off and almost as if I'm dealing with a wounded animal caught in a trap, I tell her, "No plans. Why? Want to do something?"