"Babe... have you seen the way he's watching you tonight? He totally wants you to take advantage of him. Or rather, he totally wants to take advantage of you. He looks at you like you're his prey or something."
I roll my eyes at her and reach over to our table to take a sip of my water. When I set it back down, I tell her, "He doesn't look at me in any particular way. No different from the way he looks at you and Kelly."
"Well, if he's looking at me the way he's looking at you, then I'm going to take advantage of that."
I take my palm and smack her lightly on her forehead. "Leave him alone. He's a babe in the woods when it comes to confident women."
"Just my type," she says, and then sashays off to conspire with Kelly. They both whisper to each other, cutting glances at Zach. I just shake my head, because although my girls like to talk some smack, I know they'd never make a move on him. They're very understanding of his circumstances and would never do anything to take advantage of the situation. Doesn't mean they're not talking about the fantasy of it though... right this very minute.
Zach bends over the table again, and I'm actually mesmerized by the way the muscles in his forearms flex as he holds his pool stick. He's developed a habit of sticking his tongue out of the side of his mouth just a tiny bit when he lines his shot up, and of course, I can't see that tongue without thinking about what it did to me.
I have never been so blown apart in my life as I was this afternoon. My face heats when I think about the fact I shamelessly stripped in front of Zach, and then proceeded to pleasure myself while he watched me closely. I had been so turned on, so consumed by lust, that when he asked me to release him from his promise not to touch me, I never gave it a second thought. I wanted his mouth on me more than I wanted to preserve the sanctity of my job in that moment.
I can try to rationalize to myself until I'm blue in the face that I was indeed teaching Zach something of our sexual culture, or I can even justify it by saying it was the only way to keep Zach here in the States, but if I'm honest with myself... I said yes to him because I wanted it for myself and for no other reason. Consequences be damned.
"There's my girl," I hear at my ear, just before a pair of arms wrap around my waist. For a brief, thrilling moment, I think it's Zach. But no... it can't be him because I'm staring blatantly at him while he plays pool right at this very second.
Craning my neck to the side, I realize it's Michael who now has my body wrapped tight in his embrace and is resting his chin on my shoulder. I glance briefly at Zach and see his head tilted up from the table, watching us with curiosity, but his eyes are cold.
Shrugging my shoulders upward, I dislodge Michael's chin and step out of his tight hold. Turning to him, I say, "What are you doing here?"
"You mentioned you were coming here tonight with your friends, and I thought I'd surprise you. My buddy, Philip, and I were up for a night out on the town."
I try to give Michael a light smile, but my lips turn down in dismay. While Michael is a great guy and our dates have been lovely, they've just been a few dates. I'm not prepared to handle the warmth of his gaze as his eyes rake down my body in appreciation, and the fact that Zach is here just makes this seem awkward to me.
"This was sort of a girls' night out," I tell him, now succeeding in giving him a chastising smile.
Michael inclines his head toward Zach. "All evidence to the contrary."
"Come on, Michael. You know what I mean. This is my girls' night out and Zach is here as my guest, so he can experience a little bit of the nightlife culture."
"Well... if you don't want me here," Michael says with a kicked puppy look, "of course, we'll go. No worries."
He starts to turn away, but guilt floods me so I reach out and touch his arm. "No, I didn't mean it that way. Of course you should stay. You and Philip can play pool with us."
Michael beams at me, and then waves his friend over to introduce us. Kelly and Lexi walk up and we make all the introductions, although Kelly and Michael know each other through the University. When I turn to find Zach, I see him casually resting a hip on the edge of the pool table, his hands clasped around the top of his cue. I motion to him with my hand and wave him over.
He stands from the table with unbelievable grace, and his eyes hold mine as he walks over to us. His expression is unreadable.
"Zach... I'd like you to meet a friend of mine. This is Michael, and his friend Philip."
The men all shake hands, and Michael says, "It's great to meet you, Zach. Moira told me all about you today at lunch. I'm betting this is all a step above what you're used to, right, man?"
I cringe over Michael's thoughtless words and expect Zach to erupt, but he just turns to me with a questioning gaze. "This was your date today?"
"Yes," I say quietly, lowering my eyes in shame that Michael was so callous in his words but not before I notice that Michael beams over the fact that Zach knows we went out on a date.
"That's right," Michael says as he puts his arm casually around my shoulders. "I've been dying to get some alone time with my girl."
Anger surges through me that Michael would be so proprietary. Sure, we've been friends for a few years but geez... we went out on two dates. I'm not his girl.
I smoothly shrug his arm off my shoulder and step forward to take Zach's cue from his hand. "It's my turn, right?"
"Actually, it's Kelly's," Zach says, and then turns to Michael. "And to answer your original question... No. This is not a step above what I'm used to. I find this modern existence to be dull at the best of times, uninspiring at the worst."
"Excuse me?" Michael says in disbelief.
"This modern world you live in. Everything handed to you and you do nothing overly hard to get it. You don't know what it's like to truly live until you need to focus all of your daily energies on avoiding death. You swing through a drive-thru for your evening meal while I go out and kill my food every day. You don't know how safe you are until you have to walk a daily path where at any moment, a deadly snake can strike at your ankle. Sure, you have your fast cars, loud music, and expensive meals at fancy restaurants, but you know what I think about all of that?"
Michael just shakes his head, his mouth hanging slightly open.
"I find it boring," Zach says. "Unfulfilling. A plastic attempt to take life by the horns."
"Well, I don't think that is really what I was trying to say," Michael stammers.
Zach's voice is menacing and filled with derision, and although I know his words have momentarily stunned Michael, I know he won't take lightly the backhanded slap that he's just been dealt. Reaching my hands up, I put them on Michael's chest and turn him toward the bar. "Look... why don't you and Philip go get a drink and then you guys can get in on the next game, okay?
Michael glances over at Zach briefly, and then dips his head down. "I didn't mean to offend him. He's a little over reactive, don't you think?"
"It's fine," I assure him just to get him away from Zach. "Just be a little more sensitive. I told you it was hard for him to leave his home."
"Sure," Michael says before he heads off to the bar.
When I turn back around, Zach is standing there. "It's your turn now. Kelly just shot."
Placing my hand on his forearm, I say, "Zach... I'm sorry. I didn't invite Michael here tonight, and I apologize for his thoughtless words to you."
Zach shrugs his shoulders. "We have thoughtless people in Caraica too, Moira. I've heard worse."
"Thanks for being a good sport," I tell him, giving his arm a squeeze before I release it.
"Come on, Moira," Kelly calls out from the other side of the pool table. "Quit yapping and start playing."
I turn toward the pool table, but Zach's hand snakes out and catches me by my wrist. I turn to look back at him, and his stare is intent. "What is this man to you?"
"Well... he's a friend."
"But you went out on a date with him. He touches you a lot. Do you want to have sex with him?"
Taking a deep breath, I let it out. "No, Zach. I don't want that."
"I don't like this feeling I have," Zach says with his brows furrowed in consternation. "I don't like watching him put his hands on you."
"It's nothing," I assure him, although I'm pretty positive that's possessiveness and jealousy that Zach is feeling right now.
"It is something, Moira. I've watched many of my tribe mates fuck Tukaba in the dirt not five feet from me. It never bothered me to share her. But this bothers me."
Pleasure courses through me as I realize that for all the times that Zach bemoaned the loss of his Tukaba to me, that she was nothing more than a convenient vessel for his release. I thought he viewed me the same way, but it's clear to me now that Zach is developing some feelings toward me.
This should dismay me because it just makes things more complicated. But on the contrary, it relieves me, because it gives credence to the fact that I'm developing some feelings myself where Zach is concerned, and it also validates that what happened this afternoon is something more than just a perverted escapade disguised as something else.