Right now they felt like a lie.
…
“Well, you’ve gone and fucked things up beyond repair, haven’t you?”
Daniel had never hated living in a small town as much as he did in that moment. People knew where to find him far too easily. If he was in a big city, he could blend into the crowds until no one bothered to look sideways at him. No one bothered to meddle.
He opened another beer without looking at Adam and frowned at Ollie. “Some guard dog you are.”
“This house only has room for one guard dog.”
Him. He transferred his glare to his best friend. “Bite me.”
“Wrong again.” Adam dropped into the chair next to him and snatched the beer out of his hands. “What the hell were you thinking?”
Word sure as fuck got around fast. Daniel checked his watch. “It’s been less than twenty-four hours. How the hell did you find out?”
“You know your cousin. She’s got feelers all over this town.” Adam motioned with his fingers. “Hope went to Jessica Stroup’s after your fight, and Jessica called in Jules as reinforcements.” He sent Daniel a significant look. “She also called Mrs. Moore.”
Just like that, he was back in that perfectly white room hearing the woman condemn him with a few well-placed words. You love your guilt more than you love my daughter. It merged with the look of betrayal on Hope’s face right before she walked out of his life. He rubbed the heel of his hand over his chest. “I don’t know where it went wrong.” He continued before Adam could tell him he’d fucked up again. “No, that’s a lie. It went wrong right around the time I got behind the wheel thirteen years ago.”
“For fuck’s sake.” Adam took a swig of the beer and set it aside. “You’re the one who gave me the kick in the ass I needed to stop being a self-fulfilling prophecy. I didn’t realize we were going to have to switch roles.” Adam reached over and scratched Ollie behind her ear. “That accident fucked us all up. Every single one of us. But let me ask you something—”
“I don’t want to hear it.” Daniel pushed to his feet, driven by the pent-up tangle of emotions poisoning him. “This shit… I keep hurting her, Adam. It doesn’t matter what I do or how I do it, I keep hurting Hope.” What if I hurt our baby the same way? He scrubbed a hand over his face. “Maybe it’d be best if I just got the hell out of everyone’s lives.”
He opened his eyes at the sound of clapping and frowned at Adam giving him a standing fucking ovation. “What the hell?”
“Are you done with your pity party?”
“It’s not a fucking pity party. It’s the truth.”
“It’s the truth you’re forcing. Once upon a time, you told me that I just needed to break the cycle. Well, man, look in the mirror.” With one last pat of Ollie’s head, he started down the porch steps, delivering a parting shot over his shoulder. “But are you really going to be okay with Hope settling down with some other guy and your baby being raised calling someone else Daddy? Because that’s what’s going to happen if you don’t pull your head out of your ass. She might love the shit out of you, but Hope lands on her feet. This time won’t be any different. The only choice is whether you’re at her side when she does.” And then he was gone, climbing into his old truck and taking off down the driveway in a cloud of dust.
“Bastard always did like to make an exit.” Daniel dropped back into his chair and stared at the horizon, his thoughts tumbling over themselves and getting nowhere. He wanted to call Adam and rail at him, to tell him that he had no fucking idea what Daniel was going through. But it would be a lie. Out of his two friends, Adam knew better than Quinn. He always had. They both had a vein of guilt that ran deep, though the source wasn’t the same. Adam had managed to put his aside.
Daniel wasn’t sure he could.
Hope deserved better than him. He’d known it from the time he was a teenager, and that hadn’t stopped him from pursuing her then. Hell, it hadn’t stopped him the last few weeks, either.
Ollie whined, and he scratched her behind the ears, earning a lick. “It’s not that easy.”
But the truth of it was, he was the only thing standing in his way.
Hope had already proven that she was willing to set aside the past and give him the benefit of the doubt. Her mother might not, but he wasn’t trying to have a relationship with her mother. That said, Lisa Moore had some good fucking points. He sighed.