I could feel consciousness drifting out of reach. My fingers itched to let go of the bed and make him stop, but the need to make him lose control had me gripping the sheets tighter. Just as I had begun to fall under, he lifted my head, gifting me air, and came with a grunt, so savage it pushed me over again.* * *“I WANT TO do it,” I announced after our shower. I was still feeling weak and sore in all the right places as I watched from the bed as he dressed. Given the dark, casual clothing and granite set of his jaw, I knew where he was going and why. “I want to be the one to end him.”
“No.” He stepped into black jeans similar to the pair he wore last night. “I don’t want you anywhere near him.”
I climbed from the bed, taking the sheet with me. This was not a fight I relished having naked, but by the time I found my clothes, he’d be gone. “That’s not your decision. It’s mine, and I’ve made it.”
“You went through enough last night.”
“And I never want to feel that vulnerable again. It will never be over for me unless I end it myself. My son almost died because of him. If you don’t let me end him, then I want to be there when you do. I need to see him die for myself.”
He paused from pulling on a clean black hoodie and fixed me with his troubled gaze. I felt kicked in the stomach.
He looked ready to deny me what was mine, and I was more than ready to fight for it, but then he said, “Dress warm and meet me in the library in thirty minutes.”
“Thank you.” He didn’t respond as he pulled me into him and ripped away the sheet. I was fully naked against his clothed body, but I could still feel his heat.
“I’d give you my life if you asked for it.” He looked ready to kiss me, so for once, I beat him to the punch. As I played with his tongue, I considered pulling him back into bed with me. That was until he lifted me and carried me back to the bed. I was disappointed, however, when he backed away looking hungry as he bit his lip.
“Thirty minutes,” he warned, and then he was gone.
I quickly dressed in a pair of blue jeans and a blue and gray flannel. When I was ready to leave, I crossed the room to Caylen’s crib and stared down at him. I almost lost him last night, and I realized there would never be a moment when I didn’t fear it happening again.
I forced myself to leave him and knocked on Anna’s door moments later. She opened almost immediately as if she had been waiting for me.
“I’d ask if you’re okay, but…the wall.” Her greeting was glacial, but it didn’t keep heat from spreading through my body and ending at my cheeks. “All morning.”
“God,” I groaned. “Tell me you didn’t hear.”
“Oh, I heard.” She blushed, despite her feelings toward Angel. “He seems… thorough.”
You have no idea.
“I came to talk to you about last night.” I desperately needed to change the subject. She opened the door wider to allow me inside.
“I wanted to talk to you about that too. Lucas, Z, and Angel’s extremely hot cousin were particularly tight-lipped at breakfast, though they did notice your and Angel’s absence.”
Her jaw dropped. “The senator came last night to trade the book for me and Caylen.”
“Angel tried to give you up to that creep?”
“No, but he used us to set a trap and Caylen—” I couldn’t bring myself to say the words. “He almost died, Anna. Aaron tried to kill him.”
“Oh, Mian.” Her embrace held my tears at bay though her calm reaction was surprising.
“I thought you’d be ready to storm out that door and call out Angel.”
“After yesterday, I kind of understand what’s at stake.” She squeezed me before letting go. “I still want to kick Angel in the ball sack though.”
We burst out laughing even though the look in Anna’s eyes promised she most certainly would if given a chance. “I’m glad you’re all okay. Even Angel. I thought I heard gunfire, but it sounded so far away I couldn’t be sure. When I tried to leave and warn Angel, I found my bedroom door locked. I couldn’t get out.” She lifted her hands to show me the bruises on her fist. “I yelled and pounded on the door, but no one came.” She scoffed and muttered, “Angel must pay the servants a fortune.”
“I don’t have much time,” I said, switching lanes. “I came to see if you could keep an eye on Caylen for a few hours.”
“Of course, but where are you going?”
I shook my head, not wanting to get into it. I knew Anna would try to talk me out of it, and for now, I didn’t want to give her anything to worry about. “I’ll tell you later. I have to go. He should be waking up soon, and he’ll be hungry.” I didn’t stick around for her to argue and hurried down to the first floor.