“I thought only a first born son could inherit?”
“One of the rules I changed was that the ruling Knight could name their successor. Male or female.”
“You really picked her?” There was awe in her voice as I rested my chin on her shoulder.
“Aurora isn’t just ambitious. She’s smart and fair, and it helps that she despised her brother even more than she despised me.”
“She sounds like a lovely woman.” I could hear the smile in her voice. “So you rewrote the rules. Why would you need her?”
“I wanted you and Caylen to be safe. I needed to be sure no one would come after you.”
“You asked her to protect me?”
“Yes.”
“And now that she’s the Knight, you answer to her?”
“I answer to no one. I’m free, Sprite.”
“Really?” The longing in her voice made me hopeful that just maybe there was still room in her heart for me.
“I guess that would make me an unemployed ex-convict.” I was far from penniless, but my joke fell flat when she didn’t laugh as I intended. Instead, she turned in my arms to kneel between my legs.
“You really did all of this while we were apart?” It was hard to let my hands roam beyond her waist when she laid her hands on my thighs.
“The only way I could stay away from you was to do everything I could to make things right and to hope that one day, you could forgive me for not doing it sooner.”
“You’re not playing fair when you say things like that.”
I cupped the back of her head, holding her stare as my thumb caressed her cheek. “This isn’t a game, Sprite. Not for me.”
“Then why couldn’t you say all of this three months ago?” There was no anger in her voice. Only hurt that I hadn’t come for her sooner.
“Believe me I wanted to. I almost did many times, but Lucas needed me to help him find out what happened to Z. I needed those answers too.”
“Oh.” She lifted her hands from my legs to wring the hem of her flannel. “What did you find out?”
“Not anything useful. It’s like he just disappeared.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Me too.”
We spent the rest of the afternoon talking about the last three years instead of our ambiguous future. I knew most of everything that had happened, but I needed to hear it from her that she had been okay. She told me she used the senator’s money to pay for school and then seed money for Rogue Designs. In two years, she’d managed to find over forty clients, ranging from local business owners to national fast-food chains all the while studying for a degree in graphic design. When the conversation turned to Caylen, the pride and love that bled from her were something we had both missed out on as kids. She told me about Anna studying medicine and Tabitha pursuing journalism.
I noticed she steered clear of the subject of her father, and I wisely chose not to mention him, either. Her father and I may no longer be enemies, but there would always be bad blood between us.
When there was nothing left to talk about, I helped her clean the brownstone, something she says she can never accomplish when Caylen was around. After cleaning, we spent the rest of the night watching movies until she decided to call it a night.
I had been staring into the dark and hadn’t noticed her return an hour later until the smell of her peach-scented soap reached me. I placed the envelope I’d been clutching on my lap to hide my reaction as she stood in front of me.
“Here.” She thrust the blanket and pillow that she’d been holding toward me. “The couch isn’t too comfortable to sleep on, but I’m sure it’s better than what you’ve gotten used to.”
“Thanks.” I made sure my hands touched her when I took the blanket and pillow and hid my smile when she shivered. Her gaze dropped to my lap, out of instinct or desire, I didn’t know, but it made me even harder.
“What’s that?”
I stood up, forcing her to take a step back to make room for me. What I had to say wasn’t something I wanted to do sitting down. “I know I asked you for the weekend, but I think all that needed to be said has been said.”
“Really?” She made a sound of disbelief. “Because I think there’s just one more thing you still haven’t said.” I was thrown when her eyes filled with tears, and her voice broke. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt her.
She wanted me to tell her how much I fucking loved her, but I couldn’t do it unless she was completely sure she wanted to hear it.
“I never wanted to call what I felt for you love. I saw what love does, and I wanted more with you. I was just too much of a coward to tell you.”