“What if I said I’ve been intimate with someone for the past month? How would you feel?”
She squinted at me, mouth agape. “Skeptical. Uh … I’d ask who? There’s like … one maybe two eligible men in this town who are worth looking at.”
“Who?”
Bella shook her head slowly and shrugged. “Mike Holmes and Brian Hosier.”
Pathetic. Epperly was so dang small. It didn’t take her more than two seconds to name two of the three eligible bachelors in Epperly.
“Is this hypothetical? Or did you have sex with our banker or Dad’s attorney? Or are you thinking of dating one of them? What’s going on?”
“I’m not having sex with or dating Mike or Brian. My question was how would you feel? Regardless of who it hypothetically is or would be.”
Her gaze dropped to her plate as she used her fork to pick at her eggs. “I mean … it would feel a little weird. It’s always been Dad. But I’m not naive. I know you’re too young to never think about getting married again.”
“Whoa. No. I’m not talking marriage, Bella.”
Her head shot up. “You’re not?”
I laced my fingers behind my neck and looked up at the ceiling on a long inhale. “What if I wanted …”
“Sex?” Bella laughed as if it were a ridiculous thought.
Releasing my neck, I leveled my head, eyeing her without blinking. “Would that be so crazy?”
Her head jerked back a fraction, eyebrows knitted while her eyes shifted side to side for a few seconds. “Kinda. I mean. You just want to live with someone? You don’t want to get remarried?”
I raised her so well in the eyes of the church—except for a few minor slips like losing her virginity before marriage and underage drinking. Even if she didn’t follow the rules, she knew them. She knew them well enough to hold me accountable to them.
“I don’t want to live with anyone at the moment except you.” I blew out a long breath. Beating around the bush was getting me nowhere. “What if I had sex with someone just because I wanted to have sex?”
Lord help me. I never imagined those words coming out of my mouth directed at my eighteen-year-old daughter as if I needed permission to have sex. She sure didn’t ask me for permission before she had it.
“Then I’d say you’re going to Hell.” Bella smirked.
It nearly brought me to tears because I felt this shift between us. Yes, she was and would always be my little girl. But in that moment, she became my friend, a young woman who I could confide in to at least a small degree.
“I hope not because that would mean you’re going too.”
“So …” She rolled her lips between her teeth. “Are you having sex with someone?” The transparency of her expression sent waves of guilt through me. She wanted the answer to be no.
“You look pained, Bella. Is it because the idea of me having sex makes you cringe? Or is it the idea of me having sex with someone who’s not your dad?”
“Both. Brian is Jaime’s uncle. And Mike helps coach the football team. So when people find out, it’s just going to be a little weird because we go to church and you’re not married. I know it’s not like you’re having an affair—” Her eyes widened. “Oh my gosh! Please tell me it’s Brian or Mike. Please don’t tell me you’re having sex with a married man.”
I flinched. “No! Of course not.”
She blew out a long sigh. “Okay. Just promise me that if you go public with this, you give me a heads-up so I can figure out what to tell my friends. And can you just tell me now, is it Brian or Mike?”
It’s Kael. And he makes me feel twenty again. And he’s also the Devil for running Smith’s out of business.
I didn’t tell the kids I was closing up shop after the holidays. Dealing with the anniversary of Craig’s death while trying to muster holiday cheer seemed like enough to think about without the doom and gloom of the family business closing.
“It’s not—”
Bella held up her finger as she brought her phone to her ear. “Hey, Erin … yeah. I’m planning on it. Cool. Seriously? That’s totally sweet. Meet you there around six.” She ended the call.
“Holiday Fest?”
Bella nodded. “What Did You Expect? is doing face paintings for ten dollars, and all the money goes to Toys for Tots. That’s so cool, huh?”
I nodded. “Very cool.”
“I might do it. Kael’s one of the people doing the painting. It’s for a good cause, and I can think of worse things than having him look into my eyes while being just inches from my face.” She waggled her eyebrows. It was so not her. It was her dad. Craig waggled his eyebrows all the time.
“Please don’t forget you’re a senior in high school.”