I loved the pain so much that I had another tattoo a month ago. My daughter is my life, and Tate, or Jett as his grandfather renamed him of late, has become my son. So, I had a willow tree on my right rib cage with a small Jet plane flying above it.
I also had the lights of a supernova right above the plane, so it looks as though the jet is flying towards the lights. When Shepard asked me, ‘Why the supernova?’
I told him, ‘Because Nova will be home one day, and I want her to know we never forgot about her.’ He broke down in my arms and cried. He told me, he loved me so much that he knows he'd never survive if he lost me. He will never lose me; I hope I never lose him. It's not like that isn't a real fear for me being the wife of a bikers VP. They could quickly lose their lives at any point in time. It scares the shit out of me on a daily basis.
However, thinking about my wedding day, and how it all happened, keeps me from having a breakdown with worry. I always get such a warm feeling inside of me when I think about the lengths Shepard went to, to make it all perfect for me.
My parents weren’t there that day. I would rather have died than have either of them there. My father is dead to me after what he did, and my mother, a stranger after she took his side. Shepard asked me repeatedly why I wouldn’t invite my family. I don’t have any, that’s why. It’s been just Willow and me for so long that I don’t feel we need anyone but the family we chose. The Snakes Henchmen are our family. Vincent and Tate are our family, and we need nothing and no one more.
Of course, Shepard told me that if I wanted we could marry in church, have a big white wedding. However, I didn’t care where we got married, how we got married, as long as we got married. It was the best day of my life, and I'm so excited about spending my life with him. Truly, I am.
However, right now, I am having a heart attack!
Two pink lines.
Two pink lines!
“Lyn, what you doin’ in there, gurl?” Taylor calls from outside the bathroom door. Hadn’t realized how long I’d been in here. “Babe, is everything okay in there?”
“Yeah!” I yell back while stuffing the pregnancy test into the unit beneath the sink. Out of sight is out of mind. “I’ll be out in just a minute!”
When I asked the girls around, I didn’t expect to have a breakdown. I just felt out of sorts and needed some girl time. I’ve spoiled that with the fact I felt sick and had to rush to the bathroom. While in here, I decided to get it out of the way and do the damn test I've had hidden from Shepard for the past few days.
I hadn’t done it before now because I was too damn scared in case it was positive.
How the hell did I let this happen? I’m twenty-eight years old; I didn’t expect to find myself pregnant at this age. I’m not old by any means, but I was nothing more than a child when I had Willow, we grew up together. However, here I am twelve years later, pregnant!
“You look like hell.”
“Thanks,” I mumble while dropping into the seat opposite the girls at my kitchen table.
Shepard was right when he suggested we move into his house; it’s bigger in every way. Big kitchen/dining room, huge living room, a bigger den, four bathrooms, four bedrooms. It looks like the extra bedroom is going to come in handy. Shepard will have to move his gym equipment to the basement, though, and that big backyard will be an excellent place for the baby to play when it gets big enough.
Listen to me, already decided to keep the baby without even talking to Shepard first.
“What’s going on?” I shrug at Hillary before dropping my head on the table.
I don’t want to deal with this right now, I feel like crap, and I assume I look it too. Hillary is so glamorous, tall, graceful. You can’t even tell the woman has had two kids, and there’s no way in hell you’d believe she’s the mother of a twenty-year-old.
She married Titus when Hammer was still in her belly. Hammer isn’t Titus’ kid by blood, but if anyone so much as says that to him, he’ll blow their heads off, and I do mean literally. Hammer doesn't know Titus isn't his father, and Titus doesn’t want him ever to know. He loves Hammer as his own, and that's that.
They also have Haiden, who’s around Tate’s age, couple months older, they’re best friends, and he often stays over with us.
Then there’s Taylor, my beautiful mixed-race best friend. Such a tough time she and BlackJack had when they first fell in love. BlackJack’s racist, very white family banned him from going near Taylor. He was seventeen, and she was fifteen. It almost broke him in two. They may have been kids, but they were so in love.
My Vincent, because they’ve been friends since Jack was a little boy, made Jack see that if he loved Taylor, he’d fight for her. By the time he was old enough to leave his family, he was a prospect with the Snakes. Jack told his father that if he couldn’t accept Taylor, then he wouldn’t be coming home. Both his parent’s said to him that if he went to Taylor, then he needn’t come back. He’s never seen them since.
Taylor’s parents weren’t too happy with her falling for a biker, but they allowed her to be with the man she loves, and they have two beautiful little boys together, Dante and Dominic.
I love both of these women like sisters. I’d be lost without them.
“Don’t give us that, something’s wrong. This isn’t like you.”
“I’m pregnant. How’s that for something?” That shot out my mouth before I could stop it. I lift my head to face them. I thought they'd go into it, but they don't, they both hug and congratulate me.
“How far along?”
“I don’t know, Taylor, I haven’t had time to think about it. I’m scared right now.”
“There’s nothing to be scared of,” Hillary smiles. “You are an amazing mother, Lyn.”
That’s nice of her to say. I don’t claim to be anything special. I love my children with ease because loving them isn’t hard to do.
“Mommy! Mommy, you have to come quick!”
“Willow, calm down.” My daughter is practically jumping up and down anxiously on the spot, trying to get me to follow her. When she yells how some older boys are fighting with Tate and Haiden, I’m out the door faster than I can blink.
Everyone in this town knows this house is the property of Shepard, Vice President of Snakes Henchmen MC. Only an idiot would cause trouble here.
The two men – and I say men because they have to be at least twenty – standing on my driveway, threatening my son and his friend, should know better than to try anything here. Tate isn’t quite fifteen, what the hell do these men think they’re playing at?
Neither man is all that built in size, they’re around six-foot, scruffy looking surfer types. I’ve never seen them around here before. Probably from out of town. All I know is, if they lay one finger on those boys there won't be a place in the world they can hide from their father’s.
Having made sure Willow stays inside, I make my way toward the men; my best friend’s in tow. There is no way on this earth I will sit back and watch these little fucks touch either boy.
“What the hell is going on here?”
“These stupid assholes think they can say shit to my sister!”
“Jett,” I take his arm, he’s so angry; he looks like he could kill someone, and he looks so much like his father right now. “What do you mean?”
Tate’s - or Jett as I indeed should refer to him as - chest rises and falls in quick succession. I’m terrified he’s going to blow. He’s not a small teenager by any means. He’s taller than me by a few inches. He works out with Haiden every single day, and it’s starting to show on his young body.
I look to the men in front of me, one of them, the tallest, smuggest looking prick with the stubble is smirking at me while looking me up and down like he wants to fuck me where I stand.
“Haiden, tell me what the hell is going on?” Hillary demands, just as I notice Taylor run inside the house. Haiden is also a tall kid, taller than Hillary. I'm guessing these two men don't realize they’re messing
with two kids five or six years their junior.
“We were just out here teaching Will self-defense when these idiots started wolf-whistling at her. They were saying stuff about taking her somewhere to do vile shit to her. They scared the shit outta her!” Haiden yells, without taking his eyes of the two men.
My stomach drops to the floor, and my head is suddenly full of memories I’ve tried so hard to forget. Things I will never allow to happen to my daughter.
‘You’re my special little girl, Lynette. Daddy loves you so much. That’s why we have to keep this our secret. We mustn’t tell Mommy. You promise?’
‘I promise, Daddy.’
‘Good girl,’