“No, things got rough, and neither one of us noticed the damn thing had broken.”
“Yeah, I’ll bet that’s what he said.”
“No, I believe him. We’ve been dating for over two years—”
“Jesus, Raji. I didn’t think you’d let it go on this long.”
“Yeah, well, we were just meeting and having fun. It’s not like we were living together.”
“Is he being a jackass about it?”
“No, he was perfectly supportive. Told me that he supported whatever I wanted to do. It was my body. All that stuff.”
“Well, that’s good. With all those weird Internet things going around, you can never tell who’s gotten stupid.”
“Yeah, he was pretty much perfect. He offered me any support I needed, financial or otherwise.”
“Is he going to drive you to the clinic and take care of you? Or are you going to have it done here? Dr. Jorgensen over in OB/GYN handles these things quietly for staff and faculty members. You can see her within an hour if you tell her what’s going on.”
Raji whispered back, “I’m not quite sure what I’m going to do yet.”
“What the hell do you mean?” Beth almost shouted. She looked around and then crouched down to whisper to Raji again. “You’re not going to throw your residency away over this. I won’t let you do it.”
“I mean, I’m not quite sure what I’m going to do yet.”
“I won’t let you marry him and drop out of the program and be a frickin’ housewife. That’s not you.”
Raji snorted. “I will not fuck up my life by getting married.”
“You can’t be a single mother and do your residency at the same time. Vanessa tried it, and she washed out to internal medicine in just a few months because she couldn’t handle the hours. I won’t let you do something stupid.”
Raji shook her head. “I’m not going to be a single mom. There’s a thing, in Indian families, an alternative. It’s kind of weird.”
Beth crossed her arms. “Go ahead. Hit me.”
“So I’ve got this cousin in India named Aarthi. She had an arranged marriage to a guy four years ago. It seemed to be working out. They liked each other pretty well, and everything seemed to be going well between the families. But then, when the time came to ‘complete the family,’ she couldn’t get pregnant. She hasn’t gotten pregnant even though they’ve been trying for three years. They’ve done IUI. They’ve done in vivo. They’ve done in vitro with a donor egg and donor sperm, and she’s still not getting pregnant.”
Beth asked, “Please don’t say what I think you’re going to.”
“It’s a caste thing. She can’t just adopt any baby out there. There are all sorts of taboos about it. The priests wouldn’t know what kind of pujas to say over the kid and stuff. They had an arranged marriage, so you know both sets of parents are very traditional.”
“I don’t like where this is headed at all, Raji.”
“So, in Indian society, if someone can’t have a baby, then her sister or sister-in-law has a baby for her. It’s normal. It’s expected.”
“Open adoptions always seemed weird to me.”
“The problem is that Aarthi doesn’t have any sisters, and the guy’s sisters aren’t up for it. So, she’s stuck. If I mentioned this to her, she would be all over me.”
“You can’t just up and go to India for nine months until you pop. You can’t take that long of a leave of absence from your residency.”
“I would stay here and do my residency until as close to the thing happening as I could. Then, the baby would be born there, and we could do an Indian adoption, which involves me just signing the papers because she’s family. No questions. No problems.”
“So, what? You would fly to India when you’ve got one week left? Or two? It’s not safe to go on such a long flight when you’re that far along in a pregnancy or so soon after a delivery. Can you imagine being at thirty thousand feet over the Atlantic Ocean and going into labor? Or if you had another problem? There’s nowhere to land!” She shook her hands like she was trying to fling off the anxiety of just thinking about it.
Beth had always been a nervous flier. On their high school senior trip to Washington, DC, Beth had been a basket case and insisted on holding Raji’s and Andy’s hands for the entire two-hour flight.
Raji said, “Look, I haven’t worked it out yet. It’s just that I have another option where other people wouldn’t.”
“What about Peyton Cabot?”
“What about him?” Raji asked.
“Have you told him about this adoption thing?”
“Not really.” Raji stared at the blue papery booties covering her sneakers. “But he said he’s okay with whatever I want to do.”
“Oh,” Beth said, her voice dropping in disappointment.
“Yeah,” Raji said. “Oh.”Chapter Thirty-FourThe Indian OptionRaji sat at her breakfast table in her silent apartment, gathering her courage.