?? he said. “After all, you’ve never been very concerned about your physical appearance, have you? It’s a mystery to me, since I can assure you that I’m a great admirer of your considerable physical attributes, as I’ve previously noted.”
She sniffed and refused to look his way.
He went on. “I’ll bet you a hundred dollars that when you tried on that little black dress I gave you, you nearly fainted when you saw how hot you looked.”
She swiveled in his direction so quickly that she nearly dislocated her spine. “There’s no way you could know that—” she said, stopping the instant she registered Kent’s mischievous grin.
“I knew it,” he said. “I knew you’d try it on.”
Phae crossed her arms over her chest and resumed her study of the far wall.
“I wish I could have seen it,” Kent said. “You probably looked hot enough to melt the mirror.”
“If you’re trying to flatter me, you’re going about it in the wrong way.”
“I’m not trying to flatter you. I’m trying to remind you that you’re a woman. I’d think you’d be aware of it after what we did together, but hell, I don’t know. Sometimes I think you’ve forgotten how womanly you really are.”
“I’m aware of my gender, so you can save yourself the trouble.”
“It’s no trouble, Phae.” He exhaled loudly. “You are my pleasure. I don’t understand why you won’t … oh, I don’t know. How do you expect me to respond to this Captain Nice Guy thing? Am I supposed to say it’s fine with me if you want to dress up in spy gear and endanger yourself and others in the process?”
“I’m not endangering anyone.”
“I still have a knot on my head that proves otherwise.”
“Self-induced, Kent. I didn’t push you into that pole. And anyway, that was a fluke, a mistake that will never happen again.”
Kent studied her for a few moments. “Why did you hide all of those people’s car keys in their mailboxes?”
“So their cars won’t be stolen.”
“I wasn’t aware the rate of car thefts had risen so dramatically in Zeke’s Bend since my last visit.”
“It hasn’t, and I like to think I help keep it that way. A car with the keys in it is a temptation. Those people might as well leave a pile of cash sitting unattended in their driveways.”
“I see,” Kent said. “So you’re protecting them from potential criminal activity. And how will these people find their keys tomorrow?”
“The first time I take someone’s keys, I leave a note in their car telling them to look in their mailbox. Most of the people I helped tonight are chronically forgetful. They know the routine.”
“Has it occurred to you, Phae, that if these people haven’t changed their forgetful ways, then they might not be in agreement with your assessment of the situation?”
“You’re getting smug. We’re not going to continue this conversation if you don’t watch the attitude.”
“ALL RIGHT,” KENT SAID WITH a sigh. “So why do you keep saving these people from themselves?”
“Because they appreciate it. Some nights I find little gifts addressed to me on their car seats. And some people have completely changed their ways and haven’t forgotten their keys in months. I can’t be out there every night of the week since I do have to sleep. But I go out as often as I can and the people I help appreciate it.”
Kent lowered his feet to the floor and leaned forward. “I assume you also check the locks and windows on every house in town for the same reason that you steal their keys.”
“Not every house. Just the ones that belong to forgetful people.”
“You’re a savior to the memory-challenged citizens, then. Oh, and children, too. I shouldn’t leave out all the bicycles you saved tonight. And, of course, there was the trash that you so gallantly lugged to the curb.”
Phae gave him a hard look.
“Okay, okay,” he said, holding up his hands as if in surrender. “I couldn’t help myself. Tell my why you went inside that one house. And how did you get on the other side of that wooden fence? It was at least ten feet high and I couldn’t see a break in it anywhere.”
“I grappled over the fence.”
“You what?”
“You heard me.”
“Oh, that’s too much,” he said. “And quit scowling at me. You can’t blame me for finding that absurd. You used a grappling device to scale that fence when you could have simply walked into the back yard. Don’t tell me you don’t see how ridiculous that is.”
“I don’t see it. I climbed the wall for a reason, so that you wouldn’t follow me, you big oaf. You were making so much noise bumbling around that I didn’t want you making a commotion while I slipped inside Mrs. Bradford’s house.”
“And now who’s being insulting?” Kent asked, barely containing his anger.
“You started it, buddy.”
“I think you should check my clothes and see if they’re dry.”
“Oh, you can dish it out but you can’t take it. That’s your problem. And your clothes can wait. First, you’re going to hear why I went into that house.”
Kent frowned but didn’t try to stop her.
“Mrs. Bradford is elderly and had a bad fall three weeks ago. She’s been bed bound ever since. Her daughter was caring for her, but I learned today that her daughter had to leave town tonight. Her son was supposed to stay with her and make sure everything was secure before he left. However, Mrs. Bradford’s son is the most lazy, worthless human being who ever walked the planet. I went in her house to make sure that everything was okay. And by the way, it wasn’t. The state of that unlocked back door should prove it.”
“Now, Mr. Kent Holmes,” she continued, “this inquiry is over. I hope I can count on your honor to prevent you from telling everyone that I’m Captain Nice Guy. I’ll get your laundry.”
She rose from her chair and walked out of the room with all the dignity she could muster.
She returned with his steaming clothes in less than a minute and tossed the bundle at Kent who was standing by the hallway, towel wrapped snugly around his hips again.
“They’re still a little damp. It’s an old dryer and takes a long time. You’ll survive, I’m sure,” she said.
Without a word and with an unreadable expression, Kent turned and headed to the bathroom.
Phae was waiting in the living room when he returned fully dressed.
He stopped near her. “Thank you for washing my clothes.”
“You’re welcome. Good night.”
“It’s not that easy, Phae. I’ve got a few things to say first and you’re going to listen.”
She doubted she could carry through with the threat she made to physically haul him out of her house, at least not without slipping a disk or two in her back. She gritted her teeth. “Get it over with.”
He loomed over her. “You have a problem, lady. Everything you did tonight, except what you and I just did on that couch, was basically pointless and could have resulted in you being shot as a trespasser, to say nothing of what could have happened two weeks ago when you attacked me in Aunt Eugenia’s back yard. Maybe helping out that old woman and keeping Leon off the roads were actual good deeds, but even those two acts could have been handled in a much simpler, straightforward manner.”
Phae hated that she had to lean her head back to look him in the eye. He probably planned it that way, she thought with distaste. It was business 101, physically intimidating others to gain the advantage. Well, it would give him no advantage over her.
“Once again, Kent,” she said, “you’re wrong. I didn’t attack you in your aunt’s garden. You conveniently took care of that job for me.”
She gloated inwardly when she saw him wince. “And by the way, Mrs. Bradford is blind to her son’s faults. She would have been insulted if anyone implied that her golden boy wouldn’t do right by her. As for Uncle Leon, he wasn’t as drunk as he looked. He has a low tolerance for alcohol and his blood level proba
bly was well below the legal limit. My plan wasn’t to keep him from driving. I drugged him to keep him from returning home.”
Kent’s blue eyes widened. “You drugged your uncle?”
“It was only a little something in the beer I left in his truck. I couldn’t let him go home, and I had to find some way to fix his truck without him seeing it, so I guess you could say I slipped him a little mickey. He won’t sleep for long.”
“I can’t believe you did that! You can’t go around drugging people willy-nilly.”
She shrugged and leaned against the door. “I can and I did. And I don’t think I’m going to tell you why, so don’t ask.”
“Ask you why? I don’t want or need to know why.” He began to pace back and forth in front of her.
“This is absolutely crazy,” he ranted. “I can’t believe this is happening. I thought, okay, so she’s bored and underutilized in this little town. She dresses up and has an adventure or two, adding a little excitement to her otherwise unfulfilling life. We could address that problem. It’s a simple matter to find you a more productive avenue to challenge you. But this … drugging your uncle … this goes beyond—”
“Shut up!” Phae couldn’t take another word from the man. “You’re not my judge and jury so quit acting like you are. You didn’t have these problems with Captain Nice Guy before you found out it was me. What’s your real problem, Kent? Why do you refuse to admit that I’m actually helping people?”
“I don’t have the problem. You do. You’re intentionally endangering yourself and others and I don’t like it. So what if Chicago was too much for you to handle? It doesn’t mean you can’t still succeed. If you want to challenge yourself, why don’t you try starting your own business where you could use that Harvard education and your tenacity in a positive way?”
She couldn’t believe he had the nerve to bring up Chicago. He knew nothing, absolutely nothing, but had the nerve to think he had her figured out. “When did you become the expert on what I need to do? You hardly know me. And like you’ve got so much room to talk. Or have you forgotten that you couldn’t handle your own company so you decided to quit and run?”
He glared at her. “That was a low blow, Phae Jones.”