Phae must have been using the monocle in his aunt’s garden that night, he thought. No wonder she’d done such a lousy job.
Still, it could have been worse if she hadn’t been using the gadget. But then again, if she hadn’t had the monocle she probably wouldn’t have attempted to plant the garden on such a dark night and Kent wouldn’t have nearly knocked his brains out on that stupid pole.
Further still, if she hadn’t done such terrible work in the garden and felt guilty about mistaking him for a robber, she probably never would have offered to come and fix the mess. And Kent might never have met her.
He grinned. Thinking in circles never helped anything.
“What’s wrong with you?” Phae asked.
“Nothing.” He groped in the dark for her hand.
She began to slowly lead him through the forest again. “We’ll be out of this soon. You’ll be able to see well enough to maneuver on your own once we’re on cleared ground.”
“Does that mean you won’t hold my hand anymore?”
“Yep.”
“You’re a hard woman, Phae Jones.”
“Don’t talk. Just concentrate on walking and not falling.”
They carefully picked their way through the woods. When they came to a clearing, she slid her hand from his grasp.
“Do you think your uncle found his keys yet?” Kent asked, stepping around a clump of rocks.
“I don’t know. Maybe. He had a flashlight.”
“Tell me about what you did tonight, Phae. I swear I won’t pass judgment,” he said with all the sincerity at his command.
“Okay, but one cheap shot and I’m gone. And that means you’ll have to find your own way home. Understand?”
Kent was growing weary of her threats and demands. The things a man had to do to get a woman these days. It was probably better back in the old days when you slung the woman you wanted onto your horse and rode off into the sunset.
He nearly laughed out loud when he thought of Phae, dressed in a frilly western dress, slung over his horse’s rump and cussing up blue streak, threatening to unman him the second they stopped galloping. That was his Phae all right.
And he liked it, dammit. He liked her, in fact. Maybe even more than liked. Probably.
“I won’t break my promise,” he said, “so get on with it.”
“Off to a good start already. But remember that I warned you.”
He didn’t respond.
“Okay. You asked for it. It’s a long story but I’ll try to keep it simple.”
“I think I can handle something complicated. I’m not stupid.”
“I didn’t mean it that way,” she said. “Damn. Touchy. Anyway, this all goes back to last year when we had a big flood.”
“Your uncle drinks because of a flood that happened last year?”
“Sort of,” she said. “Not really. Anyway, there’s a river, not much more than a creek actually, a small tributary, but it’s called a river, and it runs along the edge of Uncle Leon’s property. After the flood, the river changed course, and it moved about ten feet into Leon’s neighbor’s property.”
Kent stepped over a hole.
Phae clucked her tongue. “Be careful. Don’t twist an ankle. I can’t carry you out of here.”
He had another urge to pick her up and carry her off, but resisted it. “Why didn’t you stash your car tonight like last time?”
“I needed the exercise. You not up to a hike? I’m trying to take it easy on you.”
God, she was competitive. He grinned. “I’m fine, thank you very much.”
“So anyway,” Phae continued, “the river moving led to a feud between Leon and his neighbor, George Slinker. According to the original deeds, the property line between the two is determined to be the center of the river bed. It quickly turned into an ugly fight, mostly on George’s side. They’ve been in court multiple times and keep going back for more.”
“Who’s been winning in court?” Kent asked.
“Leon. The last judge told George that maybe he’d get lucky and one day another flood would give him back his ten feet and then some, but until then, he was shit out of luck.”
Kent grinned. “Did he actually say ‘shit out of luck?’”
“Yep.”
“I’d like to meet that judge.”
“Not in his courtroom, I promise you.”
“So what does the river and feuds have to do with Leon drinking?”
“That’s another long part of the story.” Phae sidestepped a large rock with agile grace that made Kent’s lower half clench.
“Well, it’s a long walk.”
“Okay. So Uncle Leon and Aunt Meg have been married like three years. It’s a second marriage for both of them, and they brought baggage with them. Uncle Leon’s first wife was something of a harpy who complained about everything he did, or at least, about everything he did that she didn’t tell him to do. And Aunt Meg’s first husband was a drinker and a cheater who couldn’t hold down a job.”
“Lovely.”
“I know. Oh, and Leon doesn’t have any kids from his first marriage, but now he has three. He adopted Meg’s two daughters and about a year and a half ago, Leon and Meg had a son together.”
“And they lived happily ever after, flood feud not included,” Kent quipped.
“You’d think,” Phae said, “but much as I love them, Leon and Meg are stubborn as anything and they’ve let their pasts get in the way of a good thing.”
“Stubborn people? In the Jones family? That’s weird.”
“Funny.” Her teeth flashed bright white in the faint light. “To make a long story shortish, after the feud started between Uncle Leon and George Slinker, Leon began going out to Trapper’s Tavern once in a while and drinking with the local boys. He said he was there to drum up local support for his court case.”
“Did it work?”
“Yeah, with the boozers who hang out at Trapper’s. But that didn’t matter. My Aunt Meg couldn’t stand it and didn’t want Leon turning into her ex-husband. Because she complained, and loudly, Leon said he wouldn’t be told what to do, and accused Meg of being like his ex. And so they both dug in their heels.”
“Seriously?” Kent asked.
“Seriously. Sometimes people make no sense. Meg is nothing like Leon’s first wife, and he knows it. He knows she has good reason for being afraid, too, with her past. But then, Meg knows Uncle Leon is nothing like her ex, and almost always nurses a single beer when he’s out. Honestly, I don’t t
hink Leon even wants to go to the bar anymore, except he won’t let Meg win.”
“Do they fight about this all the time?”
“That’s the thing. They don’t. Once a week, Leon has to make his stupid point by going to Trapper’s, and once a week, he comes home smelling like beer and he and Aunt Meg have big, loud arguments.”
“Wow. And they have kids …”
“Exactly. The kids seem to know it’s mostly bluster, I think most of the time. It never lasts long because Leon and Meg are really crazy about each other and make up right away. Uncle Leon’s loud even when he’s not in a fight. Still, most of us wish they’d quit it because we can’t be positive it’s not hurting those kids.”
“Couples fight sometimes. I’ve never known one that didn’t,” Kent said.
“Me either. My own parents got into it from time to time, and I remember being scared by it, but they always worked it out. If anything, I learned you can fight with someone and still love them, and you can work out your difficulties eventually.”
“Huh,” Kent said. “It’s like you’re making the point I’ve been trying to make with you.”
“I’m not talking about us.”
“Too bad.” Kent thought about what she’d said. “So that’s why you’re trying to scare your uncle away from drinking at Trapper’s Tavern? For Leon’s and Meg’s kids?”
“Yeah. That’s why.”
“It’s a good reason.”
Her response was warm and gentle. “Thanks.”
They walked in silence for a few moments before Phae said, “But there’s another reason, too.”
“You don’t want him drinking and driving?”
“Sure. But that’s not it. I told you about George Slinker. He’s mad that the court cases aren’t going his way, and he can be a real asshole when he wants to be. So, when Leon and Meg get into these fights, I guess George must be able to hear them. We think he waits for Leon to come home and sneaks around his house to see if they start fighting. We can’t be sure. But however George learns about the arguing, he always calls the sheriff’s office and demands that someone come investigate.”
“Huh.”
“I know. And James has to have his deputies go out there because, well, that’s how it is, family or no. Lately, it isn’t good enough for George to call the cops. Not long ago, George reported Meg and Leon to child services.”