“No. I don’t suppose you would. Never mind. All that matters is that everything’s fine, now.”
“Where is my baby? Is she in the nursery?”
“Uh-huh.” Amanda grinned. “And she’s making all the other little girls look homely by comparison.”
“Amanda’s right.” Marta smiled as she stroked Carin’s hair back from her temples. “She looks just like you, darling. Well, except for her mouth. I suppose she has her father’s…” Everyone looked at Marta, who colored. “I mean, she’s gorgeous.”
Carin sighed. “I’ll bet she is.” She looked past her mother, at Slade, and smiled. “What are you doing here?”
“Well, Lara and I had nothin’ better to do…” He grinned. “Boston’s only a hop, skip, and jump away, honey. We figured we’d come down and wait for you to open your eyes.”
“That was sweet of you.”
“Heck, the Barons are nothin’ if not sweet.” He walked to the other side of the bed and took her hand. “Travis, Tyler and Gage all send their love.”
“Give mine to them, please, when you talk to them.”
“And,” Amanda said, “my Nicholas will be by, in a little while.” Tears rose in her eyes and she brushed them away. “You gave us a real scare, Sis.”
“Well, I didn’t mean to,” Carin said, and smiled. She let her head fall back against the pillows and her smile faded. “I’m sorry I put you through all of this.”
“There’s nothing to be sorry about,” Marta said. “I just wish you’d come to stay with us at Espada, months ago…” She cleared her throat. “Well, that’s all water under the bridge. The important thing is that you’ve come through this, and that you have a healthy baby.”
Carin nodded. “I just wish…” She swallowed past the sudden lump in her throat. “I wish it could have been different. That—that I hadn’t disappointed all of you.”
“Nonsense, darling. Who could be disappointed at having a new little person in our family?”
“I told her the same thing, Mother.” Amanda looked up as Lara came into the room. “Doctor’s coming,” she mouthed, and Amanda nodded. “I said we’d all be in this with her, that she didn’t have to face it by herself.”
“Damn right,” Slade growled. “Whatever happened to the idea of Responsibility, with a capital R?” Lara shot him a warning look and he frowned. “Well, hell, it’s the truth, Sugar, isn’t it? If Carin had told us, right off, one of us Barons—hell, all of us—would have gone down there to Brazil and—”
“Brazil?” Carin struggled up against the pillows. “What do you mean, you’d have gone to Brazil?” Her eyes flashed to her sister. “I never told you about—about anything.”
Amanda cleared her throat. “Uh, no. No, you didn’t. Not—not at first.”
“Not at first? Not ever. You asked and asked and asked, but I never said—”
“Actually, you did.” Amanda hesitated. “Look, why don’t we discuss this another time? When you’re feeling stronger.”
“I feel strong enough now. What do you mean, ‘actually’ I did?”
“You were groggy, Sis. And you—you called for him. For Raphael Alvares.”
Carin turned pale. “And you told everyone else? Oh, Mandy, why? Why did you do that?”
“I didn’t tell anyone. Well, only Nick, but—”
“Then, how does Slade know?”
“He just—he just knows,” Amanda said, and shot Slade a look.
“He knows, because you told him. And what for? I certainly don’t want any of you hustling off to Brazil to tell Rafe that he—he fathered my child.”
“Well,” Jonas said, “fact is, nobody has to do that, ’cause—”
“The fact is that no one will,” Marta said. Jonas snorted, and she cleared her throat. “Go to Brazil, I mean.”
“I hope not. Raphael Alvares is the last man I want to see.”
“Sweetie,” Marta said gently, “you don’t mean that.”
“I mean every word.”
“Maybe now’s not the best time to make decisions,” Jonas said. “You might want to think about things. And your baby’s got a stake in this, missy.” He ran a finger around the inside of his shirt collar. “Maybe I learned it a little late but a kid’s got the right to grow up knowin’ who his…who her father is.”
“Look,” Carin said wearily, “I know you all mean well, that you want to protect me and my daughter, but you have to understand, I did the right thing. Things were different for you and Tyler, Jonas—”
“Things are always different,” Slade said gruffly. “But a man’s entitled to know he’s a father, and to tell you how he feels about it. A woman denies him that right, he might do anything to claim his—”
“Slade, for heaven’s sakes!” Marta glared at her stepson. “Must we discuss this now?”
“You’re right.” He took a deep breath. “Carin, honey, I’m sorry.”
“No, it’s okay. I know you’re worried about me but trust me, this is—it’s different than it was for you, Jonas, or for you, Slade…”
“Yeah, sure.” Slade hesitated, then bent down and pressed his lips to Carin’s forehead. “Just keep something in mind,” he said softly. “Men aren’t always the enemy, kid.”
“I know.” She smiled, took his hand and brought it to her cheek. “I can think of a few who might even qualify as good guys.”
But not Raphael Alvares. She couldn’t imagine anyone thinking of him as a good guy. Still, he was the kind of man Slade had described, one who’d do whatever it took to get what he wanted. As little as she knew about Rafe, she was certain he’d move heaven and earth to claim a thing, if he wanted it badly enough.
He hadn’t wanted her.
She made a soft sound of distress. Marta grabbed her hand.
“Carin? Darling, what is it?”
“Nothing. Really, I’m fine.” She smiled and pressed her mother’s hand in reassurance. “I’m—I’m a little achy, that’s all.”
“Well, of course you are. Achy, and all worn out, and here we are, giving you lectures when we should be letting you rest.” Marta kissed her, then turned towards the others. “I have an idea,” she said briskly. “Slade, you go find us some coffee. Jonas, you wait in the lounge. Lara, you and I will go hunt down that doctor…”
Carin grabbed for Amanda’s hand as the Barons filed from the room. “Mandy?”
Amanda leaned towards her. “Mmm?”
“I want you to promise me you won’t do anything.”
“Anything about what?”
“You know what. I don’t want you getting the same silly idea everybody else seems to have about getting in touch with—with Rafe.”
Amanda colored. “Well—well, actually, Sis, when you kept calling his name, I thought—I mean, you seemed to want…”
“Not him,” Carin said fiercely. “Never him!”
“Well—well don’t worry about any of that now, okay? Just concentrate
on getting better.” Amanda’s voice softened. “And think about that little girl of yours, about how you’ll want to do all the right things for her.”
“Oh, I will.” Carin sighed. “I can’t wait to see her.”
“Look, why don’t I see if I can get the nurse to bring the baby to you right now?”
“Would you?”
“Sure.” Amanda put her arms around Carin and hugged her. “Meanwhile, just shut your eyes and rest, okay, Sis?”
“Okay,” Carin said, and yawned.
The door swung softly closed. Carin yawned again, closed her eyes and let her thoughts drift. Her baby. Her very own little girl. She could hardly wait to see her. Would she look like her father?
Rafe was so handsome. Those deep, dark eyes. That dark, silky hair. The firm mouth, that had felt so wonderful against hers…
He’d been such an incredible lover.
Strong. Powerful. His body hard and hot as he’d moved above her. His hands, all-knowing and clever, touching her in ways Frank had never touched her, until she’d cried out, arched against him, and then he’d slipped his hands beneath her, lifted her to him, entered her slowly, slowly, buried himself inside her.
She’d come even as he entered her, come again and again, and that had never happened to her before. She’d never flown so fast, so high, never wanted the night to last forever, the arms that held her to hold her forever…
Her eyes flew open. What was she thinking?
She’d just given birth. Sex was the last thing she ought to have on her mind and besides, why did she keep romanticizing what had happened? Rafe hadn’t even tried to pretend that taking her to bed had meant something; he’d walked away from her as if she were the cheap slut she’d made herself out to be.
Her throat constricted.
What did any of that matter now? She was tired, that was all. Overwrought, by what she’d just gone through. Rafe didn’t mean a thing to her; he never had. What she’d wanted from him was what he’d given her, oblivion in his arms, and if memories of that night still haunted her, it only proved how truly pathetic she was.
“Carin?”
Carin opened her eyes. The room was empty, except for her doctor, who stood beside the bed.