After the day we’d had, I didn’t think I could take another part of my body twisting itself up in knots, even if it was in a horny way.
“Irish twins are born within the same year. So, I was born on January fifth, and then Raoul was born on December twenty-third.”
“Wow, your dad was eager,” I chuckled, laughing harder when he glared at me.
“We don’t discuss that. It was immaculate conception, and they were blessed by it three times.”
“If you insist.”
Scowling at me now, his top lip curled at whatever was going through his head, and then he shuddered. “And how did you get to twenty-four and not know what sword fighting is?”
Shrugging a shoulder, I went with the truth. “Because I’m a girl who was more into art and science, so I never took part in sports.”
Now it was his turn to laugh. “Pretty girl, yes, sword fighting is a sport, but not the way we did it. We used to pee at the same time and try and knock each other’s direction off by aiming our pee at theirs.”
I was torn between finding it funny and finding it disgusting. Boys really are gross!
Reading my expression correctly, he nudged me gently. “Come on, you know you want to laugh.”
“No, I just know that after Sheena’s display today, I swore off having kids. Now, hearing that, I’m doubly sure I don’t want any because there’s a fifty percent chance it’ll be a boy who’ll have pee wars with his friends, and fifty percent chance it’ll be a girl who’ll have an ass like an assault rifle.”
Throwing his head back onto the pillow, Garrett burst out laughing, unaware that it put him at the perfect angle for me to swoon over.
I shit you not, I was swooning.
The man had a beautiful deep laugh to begin with, but when he was like this, I could see the muscles and tendons in his neck, fantasize about what his stubble would feel like rubbing over me, enjoy his smile and laughter and the way his—
“Zuri, why are you licking your lips while you’re looking at me? You did that when you were making your cake concoction with Rose, and I’m not sure I like it,” he asked, pulling me out of my musings and making me gag this time.
Regrets, we all had them, and that concoction was one of mine. My stomach hadn’t been in a good way the next day, and I could still feel it protesting.
“I was picturing—” I only just held back the gag “—mashed potato with jelly beans.” If I was honest, the prospect of eating those damn potatoes ever again was slim to none.
“You know,” he mused, sliding an arm under his head and staring at the ceiling, drawing my attention now to his bicep—yup, the one that got peed on. “My mom calls it creamed potatoes.” This time I couldn’t hold it back, and the violence of my stomach squeezing even made a noise come out that made him jump. “You okay?”
Oh, he did that on purpose. The words would say he was concerned, but the tone didn’t.
“Can we stop talking about it?”
His mouth twitched as he scanned my face, but thankfully he nodded and changed the subject. “I’m going to kick DB’s ass at work tomorrow.”
So was I. Maybe not at work, but the next time I saw him out of uniform.
“Was it necessary for him to get my toothbrush to clean the grooves in between the floorboards?”
“To be fair, yeah, it was,” he sighed. “It just sucks that you had an electric one.”
It wasn’t just an electric one, it’d been a limited edition My Little Pony electric one. Now, even if I changed the head on it, I’d have a turd toothbrush, and I just couldn’t do it.
“I hope I find another one. Those ponies brightened up my morning, and I loved the magical noise that came out of it after the two-minute timer was up.”
This time when he started laughing, I was close enough to watch it in high definition. My slutty vagina enjoyed it immensely, but my back and arm didn’t when the mattress started moving with it.
It was strange having Garrett in my bed and spending so much time with him, but if this was what our friendship consisted of, I was happy to grab it with both hands and legs and hold on tight.
But a girl could dream, right?
Chapter Seven
Garrett
“You know, Zuri needs a protection dog,” DB told me as we watched Alejandro working with the guy teaching de-escalation techniques. “And security.”
It’d been a week since the accident, and I’d just had my stitches taken out. Zuri had seen the doctor after me, but he wanted hers to stay in for another three days, so she’d gone home in a shitty mood.
Apparently, I couldn’t even begin to imagine how itchy her back and arm were. Given the scarring up my side, I kind of could, but being the sympathetic guy I was, I hadn’t mentioned it and instead offered to try and find something to help her.