Steam rose from the mug. You go out of your way to forget, and yet you save all the evidence. Hell, you couldn’t even bring yourself to leave Alexandria.
She opened the closet, turned the light on, and set the mug on a shelf before kneeling beside a box marked High School. Carefully, she removed the lid. On top was the white cap and gown she’d worn at graduation. She pulled out the hat and flicked the gold tassel. She’d been seventh in her class. Though her GPA had been the highest senior year, the valedictorian was selected on the four-year average. It didn’t matter that she’d come to the party late. Or that she was smarter than Nan Graham. All that mattered was that she didn’t have a four-year record to average.
Below the gown was a collection of school newspapers. She’d wanted to write for the Jefferson Journal, but working thirty hours a week at the pizza place and school had eaten all her time.
Charlotte closed the box and set it in the living room inside a sturdier moving box. She sealed the box and marked it with the word Storage. She stared at the bold black lettering, her pen hovering. Why couldn’t she just let go? Wasn’t everybody better off if she let sleeping dogs lie?
“Shit.” She scratched it out and then wrote Trash. Afraid she’d overthink it, she recapped the pen and returned to the closet.
The next few boxes were much the same. Bits and pieces of a past she’d never been able to release. Like the first box, she marked each as Trash.
The last and most battered box was shoved in the back corner. This was the carnival box that held the memories of her mother, Mariah, and Sooner.
Her hands trembled when she opened this box. Her first image was of an old carnival program. It featured Madame Divine on the front. The image was not her mother’s, hers, or Mariah’s. The photo was of a woman who’d sat in the tent long before them. Her mother had wanted Grady to change the picture but he’d refused. One night they’d gotten drunk and begun to fight. Her mother had brought the picture up and he’d told her the woman in the picture had been a lover whom he’d adored more than his own life. But she’d left him for a rich man.
Under the program, there was a photo of Grace in costume. She couldn’t have been more than sixteen but there she sat trying to look into the camera as if she had a lifetime of sophistication and experience behind her.
She traced the outline of the girl’s rounded face. “I look like I’m twelve.”
What the hell kind of man would put a kid like that to work?
She knew exactly what kind of man. A manipulator. A charmer. A man who used girls.
She dug deeper and found the pictures she’d tried to forget. They were of two young girls. One who looked awkward and scared. The other who looked like she owned the world. Sisters. And until that last fall they’d been closer to each other than anyone else in the world. That last fall had changed everything. Sooner had been born. And Mariah had died. A barely tolerable world had become unbearable.
She traced Mariah’s face, which was so much like Sooner’s. “Mariah, the girl doesn’t know any different kind of life. She doesn’t know it can be better. And Grady will see to it that she never does know different.”
So what are you gonna do, Grace? Bitch and complain, cut and run, or stand and fight?
She checked her watch. The carnival would be open for another hour. Time enough to visit.
He stared at the woman Maya lying on the floor. Her eyes were shut and her mouth slack jawed. With a cattle prod he poked her in the chest. She didn’t move. He pinched her arm. Hard. She didn’t respond. Her breathing was so shallow and quiet he thought for a moment she’d stopped breathing. He leaned close and pressed his ear to her chest. Under the fabric, he felt the faint, but steady beat of her heart.
She was alive.
He’d overdosed her. He’d thought he’d not put enough in the syringe, and fearing she’d call out in public, he’d injected her a second time. Now he could see that he’d overdone it. She’d not awaken for another day at best.
As much as he wanted to begin the inquisition now, it would have to wait. Killing her now wouldn’t be right. He needed the confession before God granted him the right to take her life.
He kissed her on the lips. They were soft and supple. He let his hand slide to her breast, and he massaged the soft mound and then pinched and twisted her nipple.
She moaned, and a faint line appeared on her forehead. Despite the drug, she felt the pain. He got hard.
He squeezed again and again. She moaned. His erection pulsed. “Even asleep, you have power over me.”
He moved the edge of the gurney and grabbed fistfuls of her fabric skirt and dragged the hem up to her waist. He took a moment to stare at her long smooth legs. He grabbed a hold of her ankles and pushed them wider apart.
She lay limp, waiting for him, and already he found the lack of challenge deflating. Frustrated, he grabbed the folds of her blouse and ripped it. Buttons popped. He then pulled a switchblade from his pocket and sliced the center of her bra, which snapped open and freed her full breasts. He traced her nipple with the tip. When she didn’t react, he sliced a little deeper into the areola. She whimpered and blood oozed from the cut.
His excitement returned. Of course, he’d not kill her now, but perhaps he could find something interesting to fill the time. He moved to a table where he kept several of his toys. Rummaging through the devices, he selected a thick, hard rubber shaft. He cut her panties free and tossed them on the floor.
“You’ll be sorry you ever tempted me, witch.”
He drove the shaft into her with so much force a tear ran down her cheek.
The night air had grown cool when Charlotte arrived at the carnival. The same familiar scents greeted her as it had the other night, but this time she’d been prepared for the memory triggers, and she’d not allowed herself to go back.
Digging her hands in the pockets of her suede jacket, she moved through the dwindling crowds toward Sooner’s tent. She hesitated at the flap, wondering if this was really what she wanted.
Ignoring the warnings, she pushed open the flap and moved into the dimly lit room. A soft light glowed in the corner, and hidden speakers played a quiet soothing tune. Incense burned.
Sooner sat at her table, her gaze turned down onto tarot cards arranged into the Celtic Cross pattern. “So you’ve come back to offer me more advice?”
Charlotte moved across carpeted floor and took the seat in front of Sooner. Lavender incense burned and added a tang to the air. “I didn’t see a line so thought I’d better jump at the chance.”
“Traffic is always slow on Mondays.”
She remembered. She smoothed her hands over her jeans. “I’ve never sat on this side of the table before.”
Sooner slowly gathered her cards. “All those years of readings and you never had one.”
“No. I didn’t have any interest.” She tried not to marvel at the girl’s resemblance to Mariah. “What’s the old saying? The cobbler’s wife has no shoes.”
Sooner shuffled the cards and laid them out on the table between them. “Why don’t you let me read for you? It’s the very least.”
“I can tell you what you’re going to see.”
Sooner arched a brow. She’d chosen just the right shade of purple and brown eye shadow to make her green eyes pop and even mesmerize. “Oh, really? What do I see?”
“Work. More work. A few thousand bills. More work.”
Sooner studied her a beat and then lowered her gaze to the cards. She ta
pped a card featuring a heart with three swords driven through the middle. “Sorrow. You are not a happy woman, Charlotte Wellington.”
“What tipped you off? The mention of nonstop work or a few thousand bills?”
Sooner shook her head. “It goes beyond that. This sadness runs deep.”
Charlotte sat back in her chair. She folded her arms over her chest, nearly unfolded them but didn’t, fearing she’d appear jittery or nervous. “You know I have a past with Grady. And if you’ve grown up with him, then you know it wasn’t a lot of chuckles.”
Sooner stared at her. “He’s a prickly, possessive old man, but he has his good points.”
“I take it you haven’t told him you are leaving?”
“No.”
“Tell him and then we’ll chat about his good points.”
The girl smoothed her flat palms over the silken tablecloth. “What was it like when you left him?”
“Not pretty.”
“Tell me.”
“I’m not sure how this turned into a counseling session.” She did unfold her arms this time and shifted her position in her chair.
“You came to me. There must be a reason.”
“I came here to talk about you and your future. Not me.”
“I am not nearly as interesting as you. I find you curious.”
“Why?”
“You lived this life. But you did not let it eat you alive as it has so many. You got out. I am getting out. I’ve a lot to learn from you, Aunt Charlotte.”
“It wasn’t easy. In fact, it was the hardest thing I ever did. But I can help make it easier for you.”
Sooner ignored the statement. “I did a little poking around the carnival. You triggered memories with the older guys the other night when you paid us a visit.”
“I thought I might.”
“Grady was married to your mother?”
“Yes.”
“What happened to her?”
“She died when I was thirteen. That’s how my sister and I got the gig in this tent. She’d done it before us.”