He frowned and turned to her.
She looked as though she was swaying a bit, but she answered his questioning look in a steady voice. "We'll start meeting more ships soon. They can't see us like this." Her eyes dropped to the deck. "I'm sorry. They can't see your crew and ship like this."
"This is exactly what they'll see. In case you didn't just hear--Tallywood won." His tone was annoyed, and she removed her hand from his.
A strand of her hair teased her lip and she brushed it away. "I heard. But you aren't sailing into Sydney like this? With your sails in tatters and rigging strewn about?"
"That's just what I planned to do." He turned from her and strode to his cabin, immediately pouring a drink.
She was right behind him. "You order the crew to trim this ship!"
He took a large swig and ran a hand down his face. "My men are exhausted. I'm exhausted. We've lost."
"So that's it?" she asked in amazement.
"I'm turning in. Do you want to join me?" he added with a leer.
She opened her mouth, and he braced himself for a blistering reply. Instead, a sad emotion flickered in her eyes. "I would have expected this of you," she quietly replied, "in the past."
When she walked out of the cabin, he followed. "Nicole, wait."
She didn't acknowledge him.
"Nicole."
When they were topside, she started hauling coarse, wet ropes to coil them neatly on a belaying pin. Slowly, one man got up and began helping her, then another, and another. He watched as Jeb purposefully looked from Nicole to him. Then, with a flippant grin, he belted out a chantey with surprising force in his scratchy old voice. Before long the rest of the crew was singing and working beside her.
A battle lost. With a loud exhaled breath, Derek handed his glass to Jimmy and began assessing their sail situation.
An hour later a spotless Southern Cross, with all her remaining sail out, entered Sydney's harbor. The ship looked immaculate, and even though his men were flagging, morale was higher.
Nicole avoided him and, if she glanced at him at all, it was with an undecided look on her face.
When he was better able to see Tallywood's ship in the harbor, he experienced a deep measure of disappointment. Even though he'd known the man had defeated him, seeing the bastard's ship docked there, before his own, was still a blow.
But on the heels of that emotion, he was glad that they'd scoured the ship. The Desirade lay haggard and unkempt, her deck cluttered with refuse, the rigging hanging limply. The fact that a fellow countryman had arrived in front of all the crowds to claim a victory in that sad vessel embarrassed him.
Hell, people were even now lining the docks for their own arrival. The Southern Cross might not have won, but they would at least make it look as though they'd just completed a leisurely cruise. Thanks to Nicole.
When the ship was docked and inspected and most of the commotion of their arrival had died down, Derek scanned the decks to find her.
"In your cabin," Jeb related with a sly look in his eyes. He almost asked what the old man was talking about but decided not to bother. He was just too damn tired. And perhaps he was just too damn obvious.
When he entered his cabin, he found her in the wing chair bolted down in front of his desk. She didn't even acknowledge him. So she's pouting? He didn't need this right now.
"Listen, if this is about this morning, I admit I was an ass. I didn't react well to the word of our loss."
That sounded weak as soon as he'd said it. The resilience she'd shown in the last few days dwarfed his own. "Forget I said that. I know my flaws. But you don't have to hold a grudge."
When she said nothing, he grated, "Damn it, Nicole, I apologized. What else can I do? When I'm around you, I want to be a better man. Does that count for anything?"
She remained silent, and resentment sniped at him. He wanted to storm out. Instead, he strode across the cabin to face her.
And found her sleeping, her head on her balled hands against the side of the chair. He had to grin. She didn't even know they'd just fought.
She'd bathed and dressed in one of her own wrappers. Seeing her sleeping, so completely unaware of everything, made his exhaustion more acute. Although he'd planned to make love to her at last, he wanted to ensure it would be good for her first time. He didn't think his passing out on her directly after would be ideal.
He removed his clothes, then gently lifted her out of the chair, inhaling the soft scent of her skin. He cradled her into his bed and slipped in next to her. As soon as he closed his eyes, he slept.
Sometime near sunset, he awoke to the sound of her moving about the cabin.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he asked in amazement as he swiped at his eyes.
She stated the obvious, he knew, just to frustrate him. "I'm packing."
"I can see that. What I want to know is why."
"I think I've overstayed my welcome. And I have business in town."
He was on his feet immediately. She blushed and turned her head from his naked body--though not as quickly as she had in the past. He yanked on his trousers.
"What kind of business could you have?" Then a look of realization colored his face. "Tallywood. You're going after him."
"That's not it."
"What else could it be? Nicole, I have two crewmen following Tallywood everywhere he goes. The rest of the crew is out gathering information in the taverns and sailors' haunts."
"I'm telling you, that's not it!"
"You plan to 'investigate' him just as you did me? If Tallywood did this to us, he'll pay." His voice was harsh. This was what he'd feared. He'd known she would want to leave as soon as they landed. At least now he had an excuse to keep her. He grasped her arm. "I'm not letting you go get yourself hurt."
"Not letting me go?" Anger pitched her voice higher. "You haven't even asked me to stay."
"You're staying." He was being irrational, treating her unfairly, but worry made his words sharp.
She wrenched her arm away from him. "What does that mean? Are you keeping me prisoner again?"
He began pacing, rubbing the back of his neck. When he stood in front of her, he said, "It means I'm not letting you go."
She was silent for many moments. "Then I am a prisoner."
"I guess you are." He didn't want to keep her against her will, but he didn't want her in danger, either. Plus, he wanted something cemented between them, something binding that would make her want to return to him. "Nicole, you're not leaving this cabin until you admit you want me as much as I want you."
Though Sutherland watched her with that dark, hungry look that made her body go liquid, she refused to succumb. She knew she needed to get off this ship. Last night in her bath, when she'd finally had time to think about all that had happened, her circumstances had become clearer in her mind.
It had occurred to her that although she trusted this man with her life, she couldn't trust him with her crew's. Every now and then, like today, like right now, she could see traces of that selfish wretch she'd met in London. She believed him when he said he'd made sure they'd be released, but could she stake their lives on it? And what if something had gone wrong?
Sutherland thought she wanted to go after Tallywood when, in fact, she wasn't planning on it. Yet. She needed to get a bank draft to a contact in Cape Town in case the crew remained jailed and the officials in charge could be bribed. Although her instincts told her to trust Sutherland, she couldn't let him know what she had planned.
For one thing, she didn't think he'd give her the substantial amount of money she planned to steal from him. She would get away from him and then handle it alone.
Even now she would have been tempted to stay if only he'd asked her to, instead of ordering her. In fact, she'd thought he would and had doubted she could resist him, which was why she'd decided to sneak out while he slept. Now, his condescension and high-handedness infuriated her.