“You are not as bad as her,” he tells me, and I roll my eyes. “You could never be that person.”
“But I am.” I put my hands up and then down again. “It was a lie,” I say softly, and that hits him more than what I said before.
“Nothing about that night was a lie.” He gazes at me. “Being in that hotel room with you. That was me. It was the real me. It was a me that no one has ever bothered to get to know. I wasn’t Manning, the captain of the Dallas Oilers. I wasn’t Manning, the guy who poses for pictures. I wasn’t Manning doing an interview. I was Manning, just the man.” I can’t say anything because of the huge lump forming in my throat. This was supposed to be me telling him to fuck off and calling him a cheater. This was supposed to be easy. I’m finally seeing that nothing is easy when it comes to him. “All week, I replayed that night over and over again. All week, it’s the only thing I could think of. You.” He points at me. “You were the only thing I could think of. Walking in and seeing you today was . . .” He runs his hands through his hair. “Fuck, it was like seeing a fucking angel. I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me.”
“I looked for a ring,” I say. “After the second time we bumped into each other, the first thing I did was look for a ring when I came to the bar.”
“I never really wore a ring,” he tells me. “But I especially wouldn’t wear a ring now.”
I throw my hands up in the air. “I don’t even know what that means.”
“Four years ago, I asked Murielle for a divorce, and she . . .” He starts to say. “She took off with Jaxon for two weeks. I couldn’t find her, and I had no idea where she went. She took my son and just left.” His voice cracks. Oh my god. I see when he takes his hand out of his back pocket now and uses his thumb to wipe away the tear.
“I have never felt so helpless in all my life. She agreed to come home only if I would never mention it again.” He doesn’t stop talking. “I would have promised her anything just to get Jaxon back.
“She came back, and I sat down with her. I poured out my heart to her, asking her why she loved me. Why she even wanted to be married to me.” My hand falls off the handle. “She didn’t even know the answer. She sat there, and I waited. I waited and waited, and the only thing she could say was how it would look.”
He puts his head back. “Her main concern is how people would look at her. I asked her if she loved me, and she said she did, but then she couldn’t tell me why. I was honest with her and told her that I didn’t love her. I loved her for giving me Jaxon, but other than that, we were so opposite.” My mind reels at all this information. I’m expecting him to stop talking, but he doesn’t. “I begged her to let me go.” He swallows now as his voice cracks again. “But she refused. I moved out of my bedroom that night. From that day forward and well, many months before, I stopped touching her. We were married for the sake of people. We were married for show. For fucking show. Me, the one person who keeps everything to myself. I am living a fucking lie.” He looks at me. “I stay with her for one reason and only one reason, and that is for Jaxon.” My heart breaks for him.
“I stay for my son. I stay so she doesn’t drag my kid through shit. I stay to keep the peace. But in the end, pieces of me were dying.” He shakes his head. “I didn’t even know until I saw you.” His voice trails off. “Until I touched you. I was happy to just go through life and give everyone else what they wanted. And then I saw you.” He stares at me. “I saw you, and something in me jumped off the ledge.” He steps to me, and I don’t move or do anything. He stands in front of me, and the smell of him comes over me. “Something in me woke up.” His voice trails off, and he looks at me. I don’t know what to say. He just gave me his whole fucking heart on a platter, and I don’t know what to tell him.
“Manning,” I whisper, my heart breaking for him.
His hand comes up now as his thumb rubs my cheek. “You are not a home-wrecker. Don’t you ever put yourself down like that,” he tells me, my heart hammering in my chest. He stands so close to me that if I took one step forward, we would be chest to chest. “In fact, you saved me.” He bends down now, and I stop breathing with his lips right next to mine. “You were the one who made me see,” he says, his own breath hitching. “That I wasn’t dead inside.” He leans closer until there is no space between us, and his lips are on mine in the softest kiss he’s ever given me. His hand cups my cheek as he pulls back. “You, Evelyn.” My eyes flicker open, looking at him. “You are what dreams are made of.” I just look at him, his eyes almost pleading with me. I can’t say anything. Not a word comes out. The lump in my throat makes it almost impossible to say anything without a sob ripping from me, and his hand falls from my cheek. “I am over my five minutes,” he says, his voice sounding so defeated. “Thank you, Evelyn,” he says and walks out of the house.