If she didn’t sing, I know what she’d be—a candy bar taster. I smile at the thought. She loves her Snickers, and every day, I bring along one just for her. It started on the first day we met—she shared her sandwich with me, and the next day, I shared my candy bar with her. And I watched her expression change from sadness to something that looked like genuine happiness.
It was a reminder of just how she would shine beside me. And over the years, I started seeing her as more than just a friend. I wanted to be her first kiss, her first love, but I never wanted to put pressure on her, so I just kept my mouth shut.
Autumn was the same age as my baby sister. The one I lost so long ago, even though I feel extremely protective over her, she’s become something else to me, something more.
My sister isn’t here anymore though, and I’m sure that’s why there’s so much bitterness and anger at home.
I haven’t seen happiness in our house for a long time. It all broke down one night when my folks had a fight. Mom took the car after storming out of the living room, and Hayley followed. My little sister got in the back and didn’t put her seatbelt on.
It was the saddest time in our house. My mother drank a lot, and my father worked a lot. And me, I would sit alone and listen to music. That is until I met Autumn.
She makes me happy.
Just like I want to make her happy.
I know how much it hurts to lose someone you love. Whether it’s a family member or not, the heartbreak is poignant, and Autumn and I have been through it. If I can make her smile every day, then I know I can be the best friend in the world.
I don’t know where she is today. It’s her sixteenth birthday, and I’ve brought her something special, a surprise. She’s always telling me how much she loves presents. And I love making her face light up in the way I’ve come to recognize as true happiness.
It’s been eight years since my eleven-year-old self sat beside her for the first time, and it’s the best thing I ever did. At the time, I didn’t realize the girl with the strange-colored eyes—one sparkling gold, the other a shimmering brown—would have such a strange impact on my life. As if she were meant to find me, or I her, and we were meant to be forever friends.
“Hi!” Her voice carries over the quad, and I glance toward her, finding Autumn racing up to me. She’s late, but she’s smiling, so whatever’s got her so excited must be good.
She's dressed in a pair of tight blue jeans and a hippie, floral top that makes her look more grown-up than her sixteen years. Her Converse-covered feet stop inches from me, her wild chestnut curls bounce, and my body does strange things when I look at her—things I haven’t wanted to think because we’re friends.
And if we’re friends, we don’t have those feelings for each other.
Right?
“Hey, you.” I smile at her. “Happy Birthday.” I wrap my arms around her, feeling her mold to me. My eyes close, and I inhale her perfume for a long moment. Her hugs have always been good, but right now, today, they feel like more. Different. As if I don’t want to ever let her go.
When we finally break apart, I shove out my hand, offering her the small box wrapped in bright, colorful paper. A squeal falls from her lips as she bounces on her feet, excitedly. Her happiness makes my chest warm, and I can’t help but grin at her.
She rips the wrapping, tearing at it until she finds the smaller box inside. The lid snaps open as she flicks the clasp, and her eyes widen when she sees the small gold locket with a bird carved into the front. Autumn clicks the lock open, and inside is the photo of us on my sixteenth birthday when she and I went out for milkshakes. The smile on her face is bright, her eyes shining with happiness, and me, I’m the stupid boy falling in love with his best friend.
“This is amazing,” she whispers, and when she glances up, I notice the shimmer in her unusual-colored eyes. The hazel is almost luminous, and the gold shines, just like the smile on her face. A songbird if ever I saw one.
I shrug it off, attempting to look cool, but inside, my heart is banging a nervous rhythm against my ribs. Autumn reminds me of what happiness should be. When I’m around her, all I want is to have her laughing and grinning. She means everything to me, even though we can’t be together in the way I want—as boyfriend and girlfriend.