Magnus rol ed his eyes. "Youre just determined not to be any help at all, arent you?"
The demon shrugged, a peculiarly human gesture. "You forced me to tell the truth. I told it. "
"Well, then, have you ever heard of a demon like the one I was describing?" Will broke in, a tinge of desperation in his voice. "Dark blue, with a raspy sort of voice, like sandpaper-and he had a long, barbed tail. "
The demon regarded him with a bored expression. "Do you have any idea how many kinds of demons there are in the Void, Nephilim? Hundreds upon hundreds of millions. The great demon city of Pandemonium makes your London look like a village. Demons of all shapes and sizes and colors. Some can change their appearance at will-"
"Oh, be quiet, then, if youre not going to be of any use," Magnus said, and slammed the book shut. Instantly the candles went out, the demon vanishing with a startled cry, leaving behind only a wisp of foul-smel ing smoke.
The warlock turned to Will. "I was so sure I had the right one this time. "
"Its not your fault. " Will flung himself onto one of the divans shoved up against the wall. He felt hot and cold at the same time, his nerves prickling with a disappointment he was trying to force back without much success. He pul ed his gloves off restlessly and shoved them into the pockets of his stil buttoned coat. "Youre trying. Thammuz was right. I havent given you very much to go on. "
"I assume," Magnus said quietly, "that you have told me all you remember.
You opened a Pyxis and released a demon. It cursed you. You want me to find that demon and see if it Will remove the curse. And that is all you can tel me?"
"It is all I can tell you," said Will. "It would hardly benefit me to hold anything back unnecessarily, when I know what Im asking. For you to find a needle in -God, not even a haystack. A needle in a tower full of other needles. "
"Plunge your hand into a tower of needles," said Magnus, "and you are likely to cut yourself badly. Are you really sure this is what you want?"
"I am sure that the alternative is worse," said Will, staring at the blackened place on the floor where the demon had crouched. He was exhausted. The energy rune hed given himself that morning before leaving for the Council meeting had worn off by noon, and his head throbbed. "I have had five years to live with it. The idea of living with it for even one more frightens me more than the idea of death. "
"You are a Shadowhunter; you are not afraid of death. "
"Of course I am," said Will. "Everyone is afraid of death. We may be born of angels, but we have no more knowledge of what comes after death than you do. "
Magnus moved closer to him and sat down on the opposite side of the divan. His green-gold eyes shone like a cats in the dimness. "You dont know that there is only oblivion after death. "
"You dont know that there isnt, do you? Jem believes we are all reborn, that life is a wheel. We die, we turn, we are reborn as we deserve to be reborn, based on our doings in this world. " Will looked down at his bitten nails. "I Will probably be reborn as a slug that someone salts. "
"The Wheel of Transmigration," said Magnus. His lips twitched into a smile. "Well, think of it this way. You must have done something right in your last life, to be reborn as you were. Nephilim. "
"Oh, yes," said Will in a dead tone. "Ive been very lucky. " He leaned his head back against the divan, exhausted. "I take it youl be needing more . . .
ingredients? I think Old Mol over at Cross Bones is getting sick of the sight of me. "
"I have other connections," said Magnus, clearly taking pity on him, "and I need to do more research first. If you could tell me the nature of the curse-"
"No. " Will sat up. "I cant. I told you before, I took a great risk even in tell ing you of its existence. If I told you any more-"
"Then what? Let me guess. You dont know, but youre sure it would be bad. "
"Dont start making me think coming to you was a mistake-"
"This has something to do with Tessa, doesnt it?"
Over the past five years Will had trained himself well not to show emotion -surprise, affection, hopefulness, joy. He was fairly sure his expression didnt change, but he heard the strain in his voice when he said, "Tessa?"
"Its been five years," said Magnus. "Yet somehow you have managed all this time, tell ing no one. What desperation drove you to me, in the middle of the night, in a rainstorm? What has changed at the Institute? I can think of only one thing-and quite a pretty one, with big gray eyes-"
Will got to his feet so abruptly, he nearly tipped the divan over. "There are other things," he said, struggling to keep his voice even. "Jem is dying. "
Magnus looked at him, a cool, even stare. "He has been dying for years,"
he said. "No curse laid on you could cause or repair his condition. "
Will realized his hands were shaking; he tightened them into fists. "You dont understand-"
"I know you are parabatai," said Magnus. "I know that his death Will be a great loss for you. But what I dont know-"
"You know what you need to know. " Will felt cold all over, though the room was warm and he still wore his coat. "I can pay you more, if it Will make you stop asking me questions. "
Magnus put his feet up on the divan. "Nothing Will make me stop asking you questions," he said. "But I Will do my best to respect your reticence. "
Relief loosened Will s hands. "Then, you Will still help me. "