“Luca, if I were to give you the opportunity to show me how different you are, what would we do?” I asked, unsure. I was walking on an iced lake, each step a gamble, but a part of me wanted to believe in the fairy tale, if only for tonight.
“Anything you want,” he answered without a hint of artifice or manipulation.
Fear and uncertainty fought a battle with hope and longing. Was I willing to see Luca differently? Was I willing to put my heart on the line for a second time when the stakes were so fucking high?
“Say yes,” he urged, my entire future riding on one seemingly small choice. “Say yes, Katherine. Please.”
“I’m afraid,” I whispered. “What if you hurt me again?”
“I won’t.”
“You don’t know that.”
“Let me show you.”
Luca held my gaze as we both held our breath. The energy in the room swirled with possibility. I swallowed. My brain knew the right way to respond, but my lips were moving before conscious thought could stop them.
“Okay, Luca...”
And it was done.
Brain, zero. Heart, one.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Luca
I IGNORED THE pinch of guilt as I gathered Katherine into my arms, squeezing tight. I had broken through the first barrier. Someday she would realize that this had been the right choice.
“Thank you,” I murmured against the crown of her head, inhaling the citrus scent of her hair. “I will show you that I’m a different man.”
That part wasn’t a lie. I wasn’t the same kid who had carelessly broken her heart without realizing the depth of his consequences.
Of course, in some ways that was a good thing and in some ways it wasn’t. I knew the value of having solid people in your corner, but I also knew that you couldn’t always afford honesty.
But for now, we were cocooned in Malvagio’s nest of iniquity, safe from prying eyes and free to be whomever we chose.
And in this moment, I chose to be her willing everything.
I rose and poured cold artisan water into frosted glasses for us both. She accepted the water and finished it with greedy gulps and a satisfied sigh. “Perfect,” she murmured with a smile as I agreed.
Once finished, I climbed back into the bed and pulled her close. I would worship her body many times tonight, but for now I was content to just hold her.
Her arms closed around me as her head nestled on my chest.
“Tell me about this place,” she said with a small giggle. “I mean, a sex club operating right under the nose of the snootiest people in society? I would kill to see the looks on some of those snobby matrons if they found out who exactly was a member.”
I tapped her nose playfully. “That’s the point—they never will. Malvagio’s member list is a closely guarded secret. That’s why it’s so difficult to get a sponsor and even more so to become a member.”
“So what’s the point? All this cloak-and-dagger, secret passwords, anonymity...it’s kinda silly, don’t you think?”
“Of course it is, but as you know, the wealthy bore easily. Malvagio plays to their twisted sense of privilege, and the Buchanans were brilliant enough to take advantage.”
“How do you know the Buchanans?”
“Dillon and I met in grad school. Jesus, he was crazy. I never saw a man treat his body the way he did and not die as a consequence. But he dropped out of grad school before getting his degree—something about his old man cutting him off. We lost touch until a few years later, when I saw him by chance in a bar, still abusing his liver with impunity, but he’d changed from a reckless asshole to a ruthless prick who’d amassed quite a fortune on his own, without his daddy’s money. I was fucking impressed.”
“That is impressive,” Katherine agreed.
“I was happy for him. His dad...what a piece of work. You think my father is an overbearing dick? Dillon’s father made my father look like Santa Claus.”
Katherine looked up at me. “Seriously? That’s pretty bad.”
“Yeah, the Buchanans got all messed up. Honestly, I don’t even know how Dillon managed to find a woman like Penny to straighten him out. All the Buchanan boys have changed for the better, but damn, I never would’ve thought it could happen.”
Katherine cast a dubious glance my way, saying, “Well, they do own a clandestine sex club—they can’t be all that lily-white and reformed.”
I laughed. “True enough. I guess they were lucky enough to find accommodating women.”
“I guess so.”
She traced a small circle around my nipple, causing it to perk immediately. I sucked in a tight breath. “Careful, or you’re going to get fucked again.”
“I’m not complaining,” she answered coyly. “If there’s one thing you do well, it’s what you do in bed.”
“Perhaps I should put it on my résumé.”
“Perhaps.”
I resisted the urge to push at my growing erection. Any touch would only make things worse. I tried to focus. Clearing my throat, I said, “The club was actually started by Nolan and Vince, Dillon’s twin brothers. Dillon only just recently acquired the club when Nolan decided he no longer wanted to be in the sex club business. Actually, it was his wife that suggested he find someone else to run the club, and he was eager to make her happy.”
“You mean his wife didn’t like her husband running a sex club? Go figure,” she said, chuckling.
“The Buchanan boys are the most wild, lecherous, fun-loving perverts I’ve ever known in my life. But once they got married, they became downright respectable. A little boring, if you ask me.”
“So you think marriage makes men boring?”
I answered her no doubt calculated question carefully.
“No, I think they got boring. I think that if you and I were married, there wouldn’t be a boring day for the rest of our lives.”
That part was true. I didn’t doubt that there would always be sparks and fireworks between Katherine and me. Our chemistry couldn’t be faked. There were some people in your life who interconnected with your soul in a way that was rare and precious. I wasn’t saying that the Buchanan men hadn’t found that—hell, maybe they had—all I knew was that I saw no reason to give up a harmless hobby just because another person said so.
“How long have you been coming to Malvagio?” she asked.
“Over the years, a handful of times. It isn’t one of those places where you want to spend too much of your time. It’s like eating a finely crafted dessert—too much of it is just too much.”
“Have you ever bought someone at the auction?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
I chuckled. “Because as much as I enjoy Malvagio, I’m not interested in sponsoring someone into the club. It takes too much time and effort. You have to understand most of the people who frequent this place are trust-fund babies who wouldn’t understand the concept of working for a living. I don’t have that problem. Boredom has never been my issue. I’m running the Donato empire, so free time isn’t something I have too much of.”
I enjoyed my captive audience. For the first time in years, Katherine was actually listening.
“And, to be honest,” I added with a shrug, “it’s fun and games when you’re drunk and everyone’s naked and fucking, but by the light of day, it’s like the mornings at a strip club—sad, run-down and smelling of stale beer and bad decisions.”
“This is the nicest strip club I’ve ever seen,” she joked. “But I get what you’re saying. It is a little on the sleazy side, but in an intoxicating way. As in, you know it’s bad, but you want it anyway.”
I laughed. “Dillon will be happy to hear his branding is hitting the mark. That’s exactly how it’s supposed to be. He doesn’t want people trying to live here. It’s a place where people can ind
ulge their fantasies, have fun in a safe environment and leave in the morning with a secret. That’s pretty much it. And because they don’t need the income, the money that the club makes actually goes to help fund a women’s shelter.”