“What are you doing here?”
That single question, even as uninviting as his stark tone implied, sent a riot of goosebumps popping along Elise Beaudoin’s skin. She remembered that voice, as if it were spoken in her ear only yesterday instead of the years between them, and her breath caught painfully in her chest. The desire to fall into his arms, regardless of the consequences, tightened her muscles and made rational thought difficult. He looked the same — God, did he never age? — not classically handsome, but unique and different, and always virile and powerful. The tension between them pulsed like a live wire, sparking dangerously within the confines of the executive office and Elise knew that it would always be this way with them. She’d never been in his Colorado office but she could’ve picked out every piece of furniture and color swatch — she knew his tastes like her own — and it suited him perfectly. Gage Dillinger had always been ruthless in business; his penchant for the jugular had served him well, she noted as her stare flitted among the fine furnishings and dark-paneled walls. Her stare returned to his, daring him to throw her out as he should for the both of their sakes yet she knew he would not.
“I’m getting married,” she said, barely able to manage the words. When she was with her fiancé Scott, she felt no hesitation in saying those words. She loved Scott; he was a good man. But standing before Gage made the words seem forced from her mouth. “I thought you should know.”
“Why?” His cold and distant stare might’ve fooled another, but Elise knew beneath that cool exterior burned a passion that distance and time had not squelched. Perhaps it’d been foolish to come here but she’d known in her heart, she wouldn’t be able to walk down that aisle, dressed in white, to pledge her heart to Scott when another had already staked their claim. She needed closure. At least that’s what she’d told herself as she’d purchased her plane ticket to Colorado and lied to Scott about her trip.
She’d called it business. Well, it was...of sorts.
Scott, bless his naïve heart, had bought her lie without reservation. And why wouldn’t he? Elise had been lying to the poor man from the beginning.
“I need...” Oh God. How could she say the words? How could she tell Gage that she needed him out of her system so she could marry another? It seemed wrong...but not as wrong as the secret between them. She swallowed. “Gage...I just needed to see you.”
His blue eyes — eyes she remembered roaming her body with a fever that no aspirin could ever cool — flashed and hope lit up her belly like a Fourth of July sparkler. After what seemed an eternity, he broke the tense silence with a shake of his head, his expression softening by the barest of margins. “Elise,” he murmured with a hint of anger. “You should’ve stayed away.”
She nodded. “I know.” God, how she knew. “But I couldn’t.”
“Does he know?”
“Of course not. And he will never know.”
A smile that flirted with cruelty lifted the corner of his mouth. “Why not? Your beloved doesn’t deserve to know that you were once in love with your brother.”
“Step brother,” she whispered, tears filling her eyes at how casually he spoke of the thing that held them both hostage. And she knew with a fatal certainty that she was still in love with Gage no matter that she could never truly have him. She lifted her chin. “Scott is a good man. He treats me well and I’m a lucky woman.”
“I know,” he said, surprising her. She raised startled eyes to his. “I may be far, but I can’t help myself when it comes to you. If he wasn’t worthy of your love...I’d never allow this wedding to happen.”
The possession in his voice and the matter-of-fact tone sent shivers racing down her spine. It was probably pointless to ask but she did anyway. “How did you...?”
“Elise,” he said, his tone faintly patronizing. “I make it my job to know what is happening in your life. My promise to you was that I would stay away, not that I would stop caring. I’ve held up my end of the bargain...you, on the other hand, have broken it by coming here.”
“I’m sorry,” she admitted, knowing she was taking a risk. “I just need some closure so I can start fresh with Scott.”
“And you thought coming here was going to accomplish that?” he mocked, shifting in his chair. The movement reminding her of a jungle cat, all sinew and muscle beneath the silk of his skin. The subtle nod of her head was her only answer. She was too busy undressing him in her mind to form too much of a valid argument. The fact was, she had no business coming here tonight. It’d been pure lunacy to board a plane to the one man she needed to keep from her life. They were two people who could never be together. The fallout would devastate so many. Which was why Gage had moved to Colorado and Elise made a point to be out of town on the rare occasions that he visited. “And what kind of closure are you needing, sister dear? I moved three states away. I never call...aside from disappearing from this planet, I’m not sure how I could further accommodate you.”
“Stop being a cold prick,” she said.
“Stop being a tease,” he countered, his eyes hard. “There’s only one reason you would show up unannounced with that look in your eyes...you came to get fucked. As if one last time would ever be enough between you and me. We both know the answer to that, which is why I moved away. I tried to make this easier on us both. We need that distance to protect our family from ourselves. The devastation would be horrific. We both agreed, it wasn’t worth it.”
Tears tingled behind her eyes. Everything he said was true. His father, her mother, their blended siblings...the fallout of their love affair would shatter their family if discovered. But she knew there was no way in hell she could let Scott completely into her heart
when Gage was so firmly planted there. “I can’t marry him without this,” she said, tears falling from her eyes. “I can’t. Believe me when I say that I love him but when I close my eyes at night, you are there. You’re in my dreams, my nightmares, my waking moments. I can’t seem to escape the memories or the desire that haunts me.”
“That’s the price we pay,” he said, glancing away as if scalded. “For the greater good, remember?”
“I remember everything.”
“As do I.”
“Gage...I need this. Please.”
“You’re asking the impossible from me,” he said.
All mocking fled from his expression and he seemed as stripped bare and vulnerable as she. In that moment, they were equally miserable, wanting the one person who was off-limits for so many reasons. She took a brave step forward, needing to explain, needing to find the right words to persuade him. “I can’t have you and it kills me a little bit day by day. When Scott asked me to marry him, my first answer was no. I couldn’t do it. How could I say yes to him when my heart was still saying yes to you? But Scott wouldn’t give up on me and he kept asking. It was then I realized that if I didn’t close the door permanently on you and I, that I would die a bitter old woman who had nothing and no one. So I finally said yes. I will build a life with this man and have his children but tonight, I need you. I need you to help me say goodbye to the past so I can move on with my future.”
“What you’re asking...it won’t help. It will only make things worse,” he said hoarsely. “It will awaken a beast that’s been fitfully sleeping since the day I left California. I’ve built a life here...away from you...and it has taken every shred of self-control to keep from dragging you back to Colorado with me, damn the consequences! And now you show up, begging me to fuck you so you can forget me?”
Shameful, hot tears coursed down her cheeks. The truth was certainly uglier when verbalized than when hidden behind private justifications but she held his gaze without flinching. “Yes,” she admitted, not bothering to wipe away her tears. Let him see how much she hurt inside to ask. Let him know nothing she said or did came without cost. “I’m only here until tomorrow. My flight leaves at 10 a.m. We have twelve hours to get each other out of our systems. Then, I’m going to board that plane, sore and bruised in every way, and I’m going to forget anything ever happened between us, now or in the past. You will do the same. I will marry Scott and you will find someone you can love without restrictions. Someday, we might even be able to face one another as we should...as brother and sister.”
“You’re living in a dreamland,” he said bitterly. “There is no one for me but you.”
She closed her eyes. “There has to be. There will be. But not as long as you have me in your heart.”
“This is —”
“The only way,” she cut in, more sure than ever before. She advanced, resolve emboldening her step. Her nerves were suddenly calm, but excitement fluttered in her belly. She held his stare, murmuring with promise. “Time is wasting, my brother. And I need you. Now.”
***
Gage heard the sultry promise in her tone and his cock hardened to the point of pain. He never expected to see Elise walk through his door, not now, not ever. They’d made a pact to protect their family from ever knowing what they’d done together so many years ago it hardly seemed real but seeing Elise — beautiful as ever with her long blonde hair and willowy figure — made him realize that nothing had been forgotten. Desire pulsed in his blood like a drug and it was a miracle he hadn’t thrown her down on the plush carpet already. He’d tried to erase the memory of how it felt to lay chest to chest with her, milking every last shudder from her responsive body. But the effort had been futile. Every woman paled in comparison to Elise; his sexual encounters were perfunctory affairs with little emotion and he never found them very satisfying beyond the superficial point of achieving his release.
As such, he’d gained a bit of a reputation as being a heartless bastard. If only they knew his heart belonged to a woman whom he could never have.
She asked so much of him, but even as he railed at the unfair request, he knew he would never refuse her.
He loved her desperately — pathetically.
And if she needed him to fuck her brains out, he’d do it.
But forget her? Never.
Elise was fool if she thought she could forget him. They had something between them that defied understanding. Hell, he’d tried rationalizing what was between them a million times over without success.
He’d taken her virginity on her seventeenth birthday and everything had changed. Suddenly, he was no longer just her stepbrother...he was her lover. Her first lover.
And his heart had tripled in beat. The attraction that sizzled between them from the moment they were introduced had leapt to forest fire proportions without much provocation and before they’d known how to stop it, they’d been naked in each other’s arms, fucking like bunnies whenever they could get the chance.
God, it’d been wrong. But it hadn’t stopped them. That summer had been epically taboo but those memories kept him warm at night when his heart felt cold and brittle.
Just seeing her again after all these years warmed him in places he thought were long dead.
He had hours of work waiting for him on his desk. He’d planned to work into the wee hours of the night — but he knew the minute Elise walked through the door, work had been kicked from his mind.
He rose and shouldered his coat. “I’ll have my car brought around,” he said by way of agreement. Further discussion wasn’t needed. They both knew what was going to happen and there was no sense in muddying the waters with talk that didn’t matter.
***
Elise watched Gage navigate the snowy streets with ease, gazing at him with open adoration. There was no need to blanket her feelings tonight. “I’ve missed you,” she said simply. He flashed her a dark look that should’ve disappointed her but oddly, she found it arousing. She thrilled in the knowledge that she was his weakness and always would be. It was fitting; she felt the same about him. “There is no one who knows my body like you.”
“If you keep talking like that we will not make it to my house. I will fuck you right now. There will be no finesse. It will be hot, dirty and raw. Is that how you want this reunion?” he demanded, almost savagely.
Sharp arousal spiked in her blood. Everything about them was primal. She wasn’t so naïve as to think that their reunion would be nothing but soft caresses and gentle murmurs. Anger at being denied rode the razor’s edge of lust and desire and it would take its price somehow. Her silence caused him to groan and press the gas harder. They sped recklessly down slick streets, as if the devil were on their heels, and Elise could feel her panties becoming damp as her need grew. “I don’t care how you fuck me. I just want you.”
Gage pumped the brakes and eased off the darkened road, fishtailing a little as he slowed to a complete stop. Her heart thundered in her chest as he threw the car into park with little grace or gentleness. Within seconds, he was on her, pulling her to him to savage her lips with a kiss that screamed of need and loneliness, of mind-shattering desire and blatant lust. His tongue plunged into her mouth, dueling with hers until she no longer remembered that what they were doing was wrong.
Her breasts ached as they swelled against the constriction of her bra beneath her blouse. Her skin prickled, hot and itchy, against the smooth silk. As if sensing her need, Gage filled his hands with her full breasts, squeezing the handfuls as if he couldn’t get enough. His groan filled the cab of the car and the windows steamed from their breath. There was an urgency to their touch as they frantically jerked at each other’s clothes, tearing buttons and cloth in their haste.
Gage’s fingers threaded through her blonde tresses and tightened at her scalp, giving her a delicious thrill that sucked a gasp from her lips. “Ohh, Gage,” she said breathlessly. “Fuck me! I’m yours!”
With a growl, he shoved her skirt up abov
e her hips as she braced herself against the door. His cock was out and ready, his pants barely clearing his ass as he sought her hot slit. They needed no playful interlude and Elise didn’t expect one, not their first coupling since that hot summer so long ago. It was going to be raw, angry, and dirty. Elise closed her eyes as his cock rubbed at her wet core, spreading her juices around her aching hot core, readying her for his first plunge. She didn’t have to wait long. Within seconds, he’d shoved his fat cock deep inside her, grunting with the effort as he thrust against her pubic bone. His awkward position didn’t stop him as he fucked her hard, jamming his cock so deep inside her she thought he might puncture her womb. She gripped the passenger side door armrest and groaned with each painfully sweet thrust. His cock had always managed to hit the right spot, the head rubbing against her G-spot with unerring accuracy. She gasped his name, urging him on, wanting him to release inside her. She wasn’t protected but she didn’t care. If she conceived this night, she would carry that secret to her grave. A delirious part of her hoped that his seed found fertile ground for she would desperately love that child as the only way she could hold onto her beautiful Gage. It was crazy and stupid but she’d stopped thinking clearly the moment she stepped onto the plane.
“You’re mine,” he gasped, jerking her close to claim her mouth as he fucked her. “Always mine!”
“Yess! Yes, baby! That’s it,” she moaned against the building pressure inside her. Reaching an orgasm with Gage was a pleasure she craved, needed like the flowers needed sun, and she was here with him now and for the next 12 hours they would belong to each other. A spasm rocked her womb and she clamped down on a cry as she came so hard she saw stars. Gage cried out, his thrusts becoming like an out of control robot on auto-pilot. He pumped his warm seed deep inside her, bathing her insides with his cream. His moan was accentuated by his harsh breathing and Elise knew from experience that Gage had come hard. They’d always had that effect on one another, from the very first time. Everyone had always told her the first time would be awful, but Gage had taught her the joys of oral sex before busting through her hymen so there’d been pleasure before the pain. And every time after that had been a revelation in carnal education.