It’d been damn entertaining.
“I’ll bring it over in an hour or so,” she said. “Today I have a class online that I have to be present for, and then I have to take a test at the school. I’ll come in between those two things.”
After agreeing to wait for her, I hung up, then went ahead and took a long, hot shower where I shaved every single piece of hair that needed to be shaved on my body.
Though, on my nether regions, that was the only thing that I ever religiously took care of.
Every few weeks I had a Brazilian wax done that would take every single piece of hair from down there. I’d been keeping it up for so long that I now bought my waxing lady Christmas and birthday gifts.
After my shower was done, I went ahead and found some breakfast, and was just pouring cereal into the second bowl when Wyett rushed through my door.
“Your bitchy neighbor is outside,” she said. “Looking for her paper. She’s accusing the ex-husband of stealing it because he still pays for it. The new mistress is outside, too, looking rather pregnant. And the asshole’s new wife, who’s also heavily pregnant, is watching on from the porch steps with a beer in her hand.”
“Not a real beer, right?” I asked, suddenly alarmed.
Wyett shrugged. “It’s been a while since I’ve tasted a beer thanks to my schooling and not having time, but I’m fairly sure I haven’t forgotten what a beer bottle looks like.”
I snorted and went to the coffee table where Lynn’s photo still sat front and center.
“You should cut that out and hang it on your bedroom wall to masturbate to every night,” Wyett teased me.
I rolled my eyes but had a thought of ‘she’s right’ before I viciously shut that thought down.
That was weird.
I tried not to be too weird.
Some weird I couldn’t help, but extra weird? I tried to keep that under control.
She walked over to my bedroom door and hung the dress from the back of the door, then came back out to pick up the bowl of cereal that I’d poured her.
“Frosted Flakes?” she asked. “That’s it?”
I shrugged. “I was out of Lucky Charms.”
Sometimes I mixed my cereals. Usually it was Frosted Flakes and Lucky Charms. But sometimes I got really adventurous and combined my Fruity Pebbles with Captain Crunch.
I was out of three of the four cereals and really needed to get to the store.
“At least that combination I can handle,” she said, shivering.
I rolled my eyes. “It’s not that bad of a combination. You combine fruit and peanut butter all the time. I saw you do it with apples last week.”
“You can tell yourself all you want that it’s normal to combine those two flavors, but it’s not. It’d be like combining Reese’s Pieces and Skittles. Those two do not, under any circumstances, go together,” she countered, taking a rather large bite and gesturing to the door. “I’m gonna take this with me. I’m running a bit later than I intended. I have to go talk to my teacher now, too.”
I waved her off. “I’ll see you tomorrow for lunch.”
She gestured to my hair. “Wear it curly. And forgo the contacts. You’ll rock it.”
I rolled my eyes.
“Love you. Thanks for the dress. Good luck on your final,” I called at her retreating back.
The door slammed behind her, and I went back to eating. But then I thought about the few comments that Lynn had made about my eyes, and how he’d liked the brown, and thought… maybe I would go contactless.
But doing things that would please Lynn wouldn’t matter. It wasn’t like I was going to see him anyway. Right?
CHAPTER 10
Hangover level: need sunglasses to open the fridge.
-Text from Six to Lynn
LYNN
“Tell me why you’re forcing me to go to this with you again?”
I looked down at my nephew’s wife, Mina.
“Because your man is out of town, he wants you watched, and the only way I can watch you tonight is by taking you with me,” I hedged. “Plus, you’ll get free food, get to meet some people, and you’ll get to hang out with me. You’ve been asking me out to lunch for three weeks now.”
“I think you mean protected.” She rolled her eyes. “That’s out of courtesy. It’s more of an ‘obligatory’ do you want to go out to lunch.”
I grinned at her. “Whatever.”
“You look like such a stuck-up in those suits,” she said. “I mean, you fill them out really well, Lynn, but I’m not used to seeing you in them.”
That was true.
I didn’t usually go so formal when I was dressing day to day. At least not before I’d gotten the title of mayor.
Now it seemed like my new normal.
“It looks good to attend other mayors’ functions. And this one is close to my heart,” I answered the rest of her previous question. “The community outreach function that he’s putting on is for adults in the area to get to know information about the children that are in foster care. Some people don’t even know that there are so many.”