We step right back into it.
Over and over again, like some sick cycle of torture.
I scared her.
And part of me needed her scared, I needed her to understand that the Family doesn’t care if you’re ninety or nine, they don’t care if you’re the favorite uncle, cousin, human. Because when you know too much.
It’s simple.
You know too much.
And we were done making an exception.
Because exceptions meant loose ends, exceptions meant emotions and feelings, and I knew that even though I loved Claire, even though I wanted to keep her, they wouldn’t let me make an exception to the rules of this life.
She would be a loose end.
And she would die.
I just didn’t know how to explain it to her without sounding like a monster. I could hear her tossing and turning in the bed upstairs. I forced myself to go to sleep and felt like I woke up ten minutes later when the sun made an appearance overhead.
I rubbed my eyes and sat up, making my way into the kitchen to make coffee.
I stopped when I saw my dad sitting at the breakfast bar already.
“It’s starting to freak me out how often I’m seeing you these days,” I grumbled, stealing his cup and sipping.
At least this time I didn’t get a slap on the back of my head.
The sleeves to his crisp blue and white pinstripe shirt were rolled up past a maze of tattoos that made him stick out in Washington and well, everywhere.
“We’re not in session.” He sighed. “Got a few weeks left to tie some things up here.”
I froze, stared him down over my mug. “What aren’t you telling me?”
“What do you want to know?” His smile didn’t reach his eyes. “She still upstairs?”
“Either that or she ran for the hills screaming, and I have to go find her, yeah,” I grumbled. “She saw me washing off blood, and I wasn’t…” I squeezed my eyes shut. “The shaking won’t stop. One moment I’m fine and then—”
“—you’re human.” He interrupted. “Never apologize for being human.”
“It’s not natural to kill someone you used to play tag with, Dad.” Suddenly exhausted, I sat down next to him.
He wrapped an arm around me. He’d never been afraid to show physical affection to any of us kids, if anything, I got more hugs than I did slaps. Like he knew the burden he asked us to carry was the hardest thing he would ever do and that hopefully, by keeping that human connection, we wouldn’t lose ourselves to the darkness.
“What are you really worried about?”
I gulped. “Her leaving. Having to—well, let’s just start with her leaving. I mean we’ve known each other for two months; I knew it the minute I saw her, she was mine.”
He listened intently. “And now?”
“And now I feel like I’ve fucking ruined her life.”
“I could make it all go away.” He sighed. “Sergio could help, but people would know. Andrei tries his best to keep a tight leash on everyone and everything, but we have people just waiting for us to crumble, to fall apart, people willing to do anything and use anyone in order to do it. She doesn’t understand that our enemies would love nothing more than to hurt her. There is no normal, and since she’s related…”
“Shit.” I rubbed my face with my hands. “That’s why you weren’t pissed?”
“She’s one of us. She has no choice son, had you not fallen ass first in love with her, we would have still had to bring her into the Family, you really think Nikolai would have let her stay unprotected that long? I know you hate school, but she’s got Petrov blood, which means she will always be in danger from not just our enemies, but theirs as well. You know that the Russian dynasty is still pissed that Andrei, the last remaining heir, joined our side. His blood is both Italian and Russian. The fact that Claire’s running around means she has a target on her back no matter what.”
“Fucking Andrei,” I growled. “He just had to go straight.”
Dad smiled. “Say that to his face and get back to me.”
“Hilarious, last time I teased him about shit, he broke my nose.”
“He’s young still.” Dad shrugged.
“What does that make you? Ancient?”
“Careful, I could still kick your ass.” He gleamed and then grabbed me by the neck and kissed my cheek. “Go explain to her, then get ready for school.”
I groaned. “Still?”
“It’s time,” was all he said.
“Shit, are you serious? It’s time?”
“The Elect.” He gave me a somber look. “You always knew it would happen with you, with the five eldest kids, the five strongest kids. It’s time to take your places.”
“Hah, can I be the one to tell Serena?”
We’d been at Eagle Elite flying under the radar, but now he was asking us to rise up, to become the Elect, to run the school with brutality and ruthlessness. I knew what it looked like because not so long ago, my dad had done the same.