He shifted on his feet. “It can’t be that bad. Just tell me.”
She took a deep breath. There was nothing to be afraid of. The worst case scenario? He said no. She’d be fine. The rejection wouldn’t break her. “All right…I wanted to keep in touch with you after this weekend. I wanted…more.”
She saw his body tense. “What do you mean, keep in touch? You mean as friends?”
“Well, no, not exactly. I mean, maybe at first.” She fumbled over her words. “But I’d like to be…more. Maybe? I don’t know. We could text or email or Face Time. I mean, I know there’s an eighty perfect chance of failure, but if we both worked hard at it—”
“You’re babbling again,” he said, his voice flat. “I don’t understand what you’re asking for.”
“I know. I’m making a mess of this.” She covered her face with her hands. “Forget it. Forget I said anything.”
“It’s too late for that.” She heard him pick something up off of the floor and set it on the bed. Kayla lowered her hands and looked at him. But then she wished she hadn’t. It was his suitcase. “You really want more than what we agreed upon?” He sounded as if he couldn’t believe it.
“I do.” She wrapped her arms around herself. “But something tells me that you don’t. Am I right?”
He laughed harshly. “You’re right.” Suddenly, he looked different. He looked…cold. “I thought we were perfectly clear on where we stood from the first day. Jesus, Kayla, I’m leaving the country in a couple of days. Why the fuck would you want to start a relationship now, of all times?”
“I know you’re leaving. I’m not an idiot.” She clung to her forearms so tightly it hurt. “And I don’t know what you make me feel. I just know that I feel something. I like you a lot. And I’d like to know you even better.”
Cooper opened the top of his carry-on. “You know how we said this was temporary, and that I could leave at any time if I changed my mind?”
“Yeah. Of course. You want to leave early?” She thought she might throw up at the thought.
“I don’t, but I’m going to anyway.” He was staring at her, but he wasn’t really looking at her. It was as if she wasn’t even there. “I’m not going to the wedding with you, and I’m not going to any more parties. It’s over. We’re done.”
She froze, her heart twisting. “Is it because I want more?”
“Yes.” He threw a shirt in his suitcase. “I told you that I didn’t want a relationship. I told you why. Nothing has changed. I don’t want you to fall for me, and I’m not going to fall for you. I have obligations, and they don’t involve falling in love with a girl I met on a plane.”
She stumbled back from him, trying not to feel betrayed. They’d both known going into this that they were temporary. That the relationship wasn’t real. But he’d said he was going to stay until the wedding, and now he was running. Running from her, even though he’d promised to play the part until the wedding.
She’d thought he meant it. She’d thought she mattered. That had been her first mistake. Her second had been falling for him.
But he didn’t need to know how deep her feelings for him were. They could part ways without him ever realizing the truth. “Then go. I’m not stopping you.”
He dragged a hand through his hair. “Don’t be like that. I’m doing this for you.”
“For me?” She laughed. “Yeah. Okay.”
He flinched. “It’s true. It wouldn’t be right to start something when I leave. For me to hold you to a promise when I’m going to be gone—and maybe even dead. You don’t know what that does to a person. I do. I’ve seen it. You don’t want it, Kayla. And you don’t want me. Trust me.”
“Oh, so the man says I don’t want to worry, huh?” She held her arms out, finally, blessedly, pissed off. He was making decisions for her. Screw that. And screw him. “Well, if the man says so, then it must be true.”
He slammed the lid to his case shut and zipped it up. “Don’t turn this into something it isn’t. I’m not fighting with you about this.”
“Of course you’re not. You already had the argument in your head and ended it before I could say a word.” She gave him what she hoped was a feral smile. “You made the decision for me—what is there to fight about?”
He yanked his suitcase off the bed. “You weren’t there, damn it.”
“For our argument? You’re right. I wasn’t.” She pointed to the door. “Now get the hell out. I thought you were different. I’m sad to say I was wrong.”
He took a step toward her, his hand raised toward her. “Kayla—”
“No. Don’t.” She shook her head and backed up. “Just go. We’ve both said enough.”
She was such an idiot. She’d gotten attached to a guy who had told her from the start he was leaving. He’d said, point blank, that there wasn’t a chance that this fake relationship would go anywhere.
And like a damn fool, she hadn’t believed him.