"But you..." You're resisting me just fine even with all the illicit things you want to do to me.
I've seen your journal.
I know how you think of me.
I...
I stare back at him. "Do you mean you..." My voice is soft. Barely a whisper. "Do you want me?"
He plants his palm against my check. Wipes a stray tear with his thumb. "It doesn't matter. I'm your guardian. That's it."
"What if you weren't?"
"I am."
"But what if that didn't matter? What if we were just two people who wanted each other? If I had my own place and my own life?" I lean into his touch. "Would you want me then?"
Chapter Eighteen
Brendon
There's vulnerability in Kaylee's green eyes.
No matter what I say, my answer is going to break her.
I don't want you.
I want you, but we can't be together.
She presses her fingertips into her knees. Her eyes stay fixed on mine.
They demand an answer.
God, I wish I could tell her what she wants to hear.
I wish we lived in some alternate universe where this could happen.
"Brendon." Her voice is shaky. "I'm not leaving until you answer."
"You're my best friend, Kay."
She stares back at me as if to say and?
"If a million things were different, yeah. But they're not. Why focus on what ifs?"
"But you... you want to be with me." She sits up straighter. "You want to fuck me."
"If you wer
e some girl I knew, one who wanted me, then yeah, I'd fuck you."
"But you... do you want it now?"
Fuck yeah.
Let's go home now.
Straight to my room.