“Maybe. Mostly just having him.” Her gaze softens as her expression gets dreamy. She sighs that I’m madly, passionately in love sigh. “Sorry. I’m sure that’s obnoxious”

“It’s sweet.”

“I love him so much. It’s crazy.”

“I love him so much. It’s crazy.” I take another bite. Let the sugar chase away my thoughts.

I hate admitting she’s right, but I feel better with food in my stomach.

Like maybe there’s some way to fix this.

“Do you love him enough to wait for him?” she asks.

The words wash over me. They make so much sense, but they feel so far away. “Why do you say it in that tone?”

She finishes her coffee. “That tone is your mind knowing I’m right.”

Maybe. I pry a chocolate chip from a pancake, let it melt on my tongue. “Can you shrink me and fix it?”

“No. You’re my friend. And I’m not gonna be that kind of shrink. But it probably does have something to do with your mom being a drunk.”

“Alcoholic.”

“Choosing booze over you.”

“Yeah.”

“And you were scared Ryan was going to choose her over you.”

“Maybe.” Definitely. Even I know I’m walking around with a mountain of baggage over my mom. Even I know I left because I was afraid of getting rejected again.

But it feels more obvious on her tongue.

I run away when I get scared.

When I get hurt.

It was the right call with guys who didn’t treat me well. With shitty jobs. With my mom.

But with Ryan—

I need to be strong enough to stand and feel this.

To listen to him.

To give him time to love me.

I think.

My brain is running on too little sleep for this to make sense.

I finish a pancake and a half and the rest of my coffee. “Can you take me home? I need to sleep.”

“Sure.” She hails the server for the check. “Are you’re going to be okay?”

“I’m not sure, but I think so.”

Chapter 50

Tags: Crystal Kaswell Inked Hearts Romance
Source: readsnovelonline.net