She walked away…
Not even leaving her shadow behind.
Because the next time I saw her, her cold body was in a casket.
Buried with the secret she wanted to tell me.
Julianna
My wedding ended just like it began. Without any joy, but with much heartbreak. After Killian left me at the altar, my father and William Spencer did everything to please the guests. They knew there would be gossips, but they’d also do their best to bury them – as they always did.
My father-in-law introduced me to the guests, one by one. I talked; nodded when I had to; smiled when I was asked to; laughed when I was expected to.
The guests stared and openly judged.
Why the black veil?
Killian married her only because he had to. This will be a loveless marriage.
He didn’t even bother to lift her veil or kiss her.
I wonder if the rumors about her scars are true. Is that why she hides behind a veil?
Killian left her at the altar.
They whispered behind my back and gave me the fakest smiles when I locked eyes with them. I kept my head high, gaze unflinching because these people were nothing but vultures.
Filthy rich but heartless. They were looking for a weakness and I wasn’t going to let them step over me.
Not today and not in this lifetime.
By the end of the evening, I was more mentally exhausted than ever and it was taking a toll on my body. My legs had grown considerably weaker, trembling under my own weight and the heavy dress. My limp was more pronounced and I flexed my toes in my ivory, pearl flats. They were custom-made to match my dress.
My face had started to itch, my skin feeling stretched tight over my bones. The urge to scratch my flesh was strong and I fidgeted with my hands, burying them into the thick tulles of my gown so I wouldn’t end up doing something embarrassing like lift my veil and claw my face until it bled.
When I woke up from my coma, pain came in a series of waves, similar to grief. And for the longest time, I wanted reprieve from it. Popping the sleeping pills like my life depended on them, I chased the numbness – the world between reality and unconsciousness.
Until I started to obsess over it.
We were all addicted to something that took pain away.
But me?
Well, I needed it.
Pain buried its fangs into my flesh, tearing into me, sinking its poison into my veins and I craved it more than I wanted solace or needed salvation.
Pain was a dwelling of madness, but it was exactly what kept me sane.
After dinner, I excused myself – not that I was needed, anyway – and Selene helped me back to my room. This part of the castle was eerily quiet and dark. The castle was built in mid-1800s and nothing had changed. The walls were still the same. The windows, the doors, the wooden planks – everything was still antique and practically ancient.
I was very much interested in anything historical, but I never imagined that I’d get married in a real castle and definitely not as beautifully deserted and grand as this one.
I itched to explore every corridor, every room and crevice of this place, to let the history of this castle bleed on my fingers. I heard these walls held a tragic love story and it called to me. The echoes of the whispered heartbreak lured me into its depth the moment I stepped foot into this castle.
The wedding was over and done with. I had two weeks to explore this Isle and all the secrets that came with it. Just not tonight.
All the fight had left my body and I swayed on my feet as we climbed up the stairs that led to the East swing, where my room was located. I barely even noticed the frames on the walls or the chandeliers decorating the corridor.
The moment I stepped into my room, my legs gave out from under me and I sagged onto the floor, my gown practically enveloping me.
“Do you think Killian will come to you tonight?” Selene asked, while slowly unlacing my wedding dress. “It’s your first night as a married couple, after all.”
“He didn’t even kiss me at the altar. I don’t think he’s coming to my room tonight.” I hoped not.
“I think your father expects–”
“… bloody sheets in the morning?” I cut her off, my heart hammering in my chest.
“Julianna!” Selene hissed, outraged. “I was not going to say that.”
I shrugged and lifted my black veil off my face. Selene was the only person who has seen me without the veil.
She had seen all of me.
Every single flaw.
All the little imperfections that marred my skin.
Selene took a deep breath, once again composed, before she pulled apart the last lace and I could finally breathe. The corset had been pushing into my chest and against my rib cage for hours. “I was going to say that your father expects you and Killian to get along.”