Shade ran to the bathroom while she put her shoes on, coming back with a fire extinguisher he kept under the sink. There were sounds of screams from upstairs and running feet as the fire alarm went off.
“How are we going to get out of here?” She looked frantically around the room, seeing they were trapped inside.
“The brothers will get us out,” Shade said grimly.
Going to his dresser, he pulled out a couple of shirts and then ran to the bathroom again to wet them. He came back with the wet clothes, tying one across her face then his own.
Just as he finished, they heard the sounds of a fire hose and an extinguisher from outside the bedroom door.
There was a loud bang on the door, and Shade opened it. Viper stood on the other side with just jeans and boots on.
“Let’s go!” he yelled.
Shade took Lily’s hand, pushing her behind Viper as he followed. It was pitch-dark except for the dying embers of the blackened walls. Viper was carrying a flashlight as the brothers put out the fire with water hoses, spraying the smoking couch. The steps to the upstairs were destroyed, the blackened door closed.
Viper led them out the side door as Lily started to cough, choking on the smoke.
Shade picked her up into his arms, carrying her back to the main part of the house and into the living room before removing the cloth he had tied around her face.
Beth handed Lily a glass of water while Shade stood near her as she quit coughing long enough to take a drink. Then the glass was falling out of her hands, crashing to the floor as she grabbed her head. The crowded room went quiet the instant Lily began screaming.
Shade dropped down to his knees in front of Lily, knowing it was going to be bad. He had witnessed the gradual, spiraling ferocity of her panic attacks and knew this was the worst he had seen. Seeing Beth’s terror for her sister, his assumption that it was indeed the worst was confirmed.
“Razer, call Rachel and tell her to get here as fast as she can. Beth, call her doctor.” Shade could do nothing except hold on to the woman he loved more than life itself as her tortured screams scored his soul with an agony he couldn’t stop.
His friends stood back, giving him space as she fell to the floor. All he could do was hold her, repeating her name as soothingly as possible.
Beth returned, falling to her knees beside him, calling for Lily as she held her hand. It seemed like forever, each minute ticking by endlessly, until Rachel ran through the door Cash was holding open.
“Move out of her way,” Cash ordered everyone.
Shade didn’t make a move to release Lily whose voice had broken from her screams of terror until Rachel motioned for him to move over, and he complied shakily. She sat down on the floor by Lily’s head, pulling it onto her lap. Her graceful hands went to Lily’s temples, pressing her fingers along them while rubbing in soothing circles.
Then everyone went silent as Rachel’s hushed voice spoke to Lily. “Lily, what do you need me to do?”
“Shade will come.” He tensed when he heard her hoarse voice.
Lily was staring blindly up at the ceiling, lost in a world of terror where he couldn’t reach her. He wanted to snatch her up and drive her to the hospital, but the doctor was on his way and he would get there quicker than taking her to the hospital.
“Where is he? Shade? Shade! Where are you, Shade? Was I bad? Is that why you’re not here? Shade, please help me. I’m so scared.
“Beth, please, I won’t be mad at you anymore. I’ll be good, I promise. Please, Beth. I want to go home. Please. Beth!
“Shade! Help me!”
While Shade nearly broke down in front of The Last Riders, Beth cried, her shoulders shaking as she held Lily’s hand.
“Razer? Razer! You promised me no one would hurt me. You broke your promise. Razer, please help!”
Razer fell down next to him. The tough brother had tears sliding down his cheeks.
“Shade! Shade!
“Pastor Dean! Please, help me!
“Vida? Sawyer? Where are you? Why did you leave me? Vida! Sawyer! Please, help me.”
Shade didn’t recognize the names and Beth shook her head, indicating she didn’t, either.
Cash let the doctor in who had been treating Lily since she had almost died and again after she had the panic attack at the diner. They had told him then what Rachel had done for Lily.
The doctor crouched down, taking Lily’s vital signs.
“Shade … Shade…” She kept repeating his name over and over.
Shade picked up the glass she had dropped and threw it across the room, feeling helpless to do anything for her. He had promised to protect her but he couldn’t, not from her own demons.
All of a sudden, Lily seemed to calm down, like she was hearing something no one else could. Shade hoped that somehow Rachel had finally reached her.
“I’m here! I’m here! Help me!”
Rachel’s face twisted as if she actually saw the horror Lily was seeing in her mind.
“Help me! I’m lost! I can’t find my way back!”
Beth sobbed at Lily’s tortured declaration.
The doctor sat on his knees, watching carefully, his hand on Lily’s pulse.
“The flames won’t let me pass, and I’m afraid to go the other way in the dark. I’m afraid I’ll get lost!” Lily screamed in terror.
Rachel’s brows furrowed.
“But you’re on the other side of the flames!” Lily cried out.
The members in the room stared at each other then looked back at Rachel. Everyone came to the same conclusion: Lily actually believed Rachel was with her.
“How did you do that without getting burned?”
Rachel shook her head.
“I want to get out of here,” Lily whimpered. “Can you help me?”
There was a pause.
“Then we’re both lost. I want to go home.” Lily started crying again.
After another pause, Lily screamed, “I can’t go through there!”
Rachel’s hands tensed at Lily’s temples, her face appearing heartbroken.
“No, I can’t!”
“Lily, your memories have broken free. There is no locking them away anymore. The only way to avoid it is to stay lost. You have to go through the flames,” Rachel spoke aloud that time, barely whispering.
“They’ll hurt me again!”
“No one is ever going to hurt you ag
ain. Didn’t The Last Riders save you tonight? They’re not going to let anyone hurt you again. You know that deep in your heart.” Rachel raised a hand in a turning motion then dropped it back to Lily’s forehead.
“I can’t,” Lily sobbed.
“Not alone, but together we can. I’m beside you. I won’t let you go. Shade is here and so are Beth and Razer.”
As Rachel spoke, Shade moved as close as he could to Lily, placing his hand on her shoulder. Next to her, Beth and Razer each held her hands tightly. “We’re all here for you, Lily. Lead us home.”
The doctor moved to the side, opening his bag and taking out a syringe before inserting it into her arm.
“It will relax her,” he said quietly so Shade could understand what he was doing.
Lily cried softly, her legs scissoring on the carpet as if she was actually walking.
Suddenly, a tortured scream filled the silence of the room as she withered on the floor.
Shade was about to yell at the doctor to give her something to knock her out when Rachel spoke loudly over her screaming.
“The pain will lessen as you go through the flames. You’ll leave the pain behind, Lily, because they can’t hurt you anymore. Keep walking.”
Lily began talking, revealing the monsters she had lived with while hiding them from the ones she loved. She had suffered alone with the memories of her childhood. Shade had heard most of it the night he had turned the lights out in the hospital. However, it wasn’t any easier hearing it again; it was actually worse because, this time, others were listening. He almost made them leave then decided against it.
For Lily truly to heal, she had to have others around her who loved and understood the horror she had survived. Keeping it a secret was driving her to lose her mind. The Last Riders were a family, and it was going to take a family’s love and compassion as strong as them to destroy her monsters.
Chapter 57
Shade carried Lily upstairs with the doctor following on his heels. He opened the third door down, thinking Raci could sleep with Rider or Jewell. He wasn’t letting Lily sleep in his basement room until the situation with the fire was sorted out.