The Journey Home

Cale and I had hardly spoken to each other. Other than helping each other give Lily a bath together, we pretty much just took turns with her. I lay in bed almost every night and fought to hold back my tears. I longed for something more with Cale and Lily. But I felt so guilty for the things that were running through my mind. I closed my eyes and pictured us walking along a path, each holding one of Lily’s hands as she begged us to swing her again.

My phone vibrating on the table pulled me out of my daydream. I picked it up and saw it was a text from Andre.

Andre: Ciao, Bella. Have you missed me? I’ve missed your touch, your smell…me buried deep inside of you. I’m leaving first thing tomorrow morning.

I put my phone down and tried to push the panic down.

“Are you okay?” Monica asked me. I smiled and nodded my head.

“Yep, just my boss.”

Oh God. Why did I just lie?

Cale stood and began dancing with Lily as he sang to her. My insides melted instantly as I tried to ignore the pulsing sensation between my thighs. I wanted him. I wanted to share this life with him so bad.

Andre. I cared about Andre. Thinking like this was wrong. It was just wrong.

I cleared my throat as I pulled my eyes from Cale. “Andre’s flying in tomorrow.”

Monica spun around. “Why is he coming here? What about Cale? What about Lily?”

Her outburst caught me off-guard. “What about Cale and Lily?”

Her eyes flicked between Cale and me. She almost seemed panicked. “You’re just going to leave them?”

My mouth gaped open. “Um…considering the fact that I’m not Lily’s mother, or Cale’s wife, I don’t think it’s my place to stay here any longer.”

My hands shook as I fought the battles taking place in my heart. I could easily text Andre and tell him to wait another week. I know he wouldn’t argue with me. Or I could walk away, leaving Lily and Cale on their own. I was so tired of walking away.

Monica sat down next to me. “Listen, Maddie, I’m not trying to tell you how to live your life. But your being here is really helping Cale.”

I laughed. “We don’t even talk to each other.”

“You know what I mean. It’s like, with you here, he feels like he can do this. You were the only person who could snap him out of it after Zoey’s death. Can’t you just give it another week?”

I looked back out at Cale and Lily. My heart exploded with something I had been trying to fight for months.

I texted Andre back.

Me: Ciao! Things are crazy here. I’m trying, along with Monica and Cale’s mom, to help him and Lily get settled. Zoey didn’t prepare at all for the baby. This week’s task is to get the nursery ready. I’d hate for you to come now when we wouldn’t get to spend any time together. Do you think you could hold off a week? P.S. I’ve missed you too.

I set my phone down and waited. Since Andre had questioned my feelings for Cale in Italy, I was worried he would think there was more going on then there was.

Andre: Wow. That has to be really hard for Cale that Zoey didn’t have any plans. I’m so sorry, babe. I don’t mind waiting another week if needed. I promise to completely relax you when I get there, though. I have plans for endless massages and orgasms.

My stomach clenched at the thought of what Andre would do to relax me. I bit my lip and felt my cheeks flush.

“Damn, girl. Is that boy sexting you?”

I giggled as I rolled my eyes at Monica.

Me: You have no idea how wonderful that sounds. I’ll text you later this evening or tomorrow. Maybe you can help me…relax.

Andre: Son of a bitch, Maddison. I’m in a meeting fighting to keep my dick from growing.

Me: Haha! Talk to ya soon!

Andre: Arrivederci, Bella.

I set my phone down and picked up the report I’d been working on earlier. The main perk of my job was I worked mostly from home, except for when I had to travel. I sighed as I tried to concentrate.

I heard the door to the deck slide open. I looked up to see Cale walking in with Lily. He was grinning down at her, and I couldn’t help but smile at the love on his face.

Monica laughed. “Jesus, Cale. You’re going to spoil her by carrying her around all the time.”

He didn’t even look up at Monica. “I don’t care. She likes being in daddy’s arms.”

My stomach dropped and I had felt a slight pinch of jealousy.

Monica stood and walked over to kiss Lily on the head. “I’m going to miss you my sweet, little peanut.”

I snapped my head over. Both Cale and I blurted, “What do you mean?”

Jack came into the room. “Oh, shit. Didn’t we tell you? Monica and I are going to Texas to visit my grandparents. You know, introduce my bitch to the rest of the family and all that shit.”

I stood so fast that my chair flew backward and crashed onto the floor. Lily instantly started crying.

Cale shot me a dirty look. “Good going, Maddie. You scared her.”

I gave him a dirty look back. “I didn’t do it on purpose. Besides, she needs to get used to loud noises or she’ll react that way all the time. Just like at naptime—you have to stop tiptoeing around. She needs to learn to sleep through noise.”

Cale laughed as he put Lily in her swing. “Like you’re an expert.”

“Fuck you, Cale.”

He winked at me and said, “You wish you could.”

“Well, now that I know the two of you are going to play nice and not act like twelve year olds, Jack and I can leave with the confidence that Lily is in good hands.”

I glanced back at Monica. “Wait. You two can’t leave us.”

Jack looked at me like I’d grown two heads. “Maddie, you know more about taking care of Lily than any of us. You’ll be fine.”

I shook my head. “I’m not worried about, Lily. You can’t leave me here with Cale.”

I felt his hot breath up against my neck as he came up behind me. “Don’t worry, Bella…I promise to behave.”

I spun around and punched him on the arm. “Stop calling me that, you asshole.”

Cale laughed as he turned and walked into the kitchen. I looked back at Monica with pleading eyes. “Please,” I begged.

She kissed me on the cheek. “Sorry, Maddie. We’ve had this trip planned for weeks. You’ll be fine. Stop trying so hard to hate each other. If you put as much effort into being his friend as you do trying push him away, you’d probably both be so much happier. You can’t push love away forever. Fate has a way of stepping in, one way or another.”

I stood there, staring at my best friend. I wasn’t sure if I loved or hated her right now.

I reached for my inner strength and pushed aside my true feelings. “Pssh, please. I don’t even know what you’re talking about. I have a boyfriend, and we’re very happy, thank you. I care about him, and he fulfills me in more than one way.”

Monica’s eyes changed. The way she looked at me, I couldn’t tell if she was feeling sorry for me or if she was pissed off. She rolled her eyes and sighed.

“Whatever, Maddie. I’m glad you’re enjoying your boyfriend.” Monica looked over my shoulder, and I was guessing Cale had come back into the living room. She shot me an evil smile. “Too bad you pushed Andre’s arrival back for a week. Hope you packed your handy, dandy vibrator. You need a serious orgasm, sweetheart. I know how bitchy you get when you need to…relax.”

My mouth dropped open as Jack busted out laughing. Monica turned and headed for the door. She waved, saying, “Have fun guys. Take care of my peanut for me.”

Jack slapped Cale on the back, then kissed me on the cheek. I stood there stunned. I was going to kill her. Kill. Her. She did that on purpose.

I wasn’t sure how long Cale and I stared at the door before he finally spoke. “I can’t believe they left us,” he whispered.

I closed my eyes and tried to push it all out. I turned to Cale and was about to say something when my whole world came

to a stop.

Oh Fuck. I’m so screwed.

He stood there, having the nerve to look amazing, with his toned body and messy, brown hair. His green eyes pierced mine, holding my stare longer than they should have. My eyes moved down his body. He had on a muscle tee that looked like it was two sizes too small, jeans that hung just barely on his hips, bare feet…and he was carrying a damn bottle full of milk and a bib.

Sexiest. Thing. Ever.

A soft moan escaped from my mouth. We were alone. For the first time we were truly alone. I licked my bottom lip back and forth and then bit down on it as I stared at him.

Maddison Powers what the hell is wrong with you? Turn away. Look. Away.

The smile that spread across his damn face told me he could see how turned on I was just by looking at him. The idea of him making love to me pushed itself into my mind. I placed my hand on my stomach and fought like hell to keep my fingers from slipping into my panties, relieving my ache.

I could almost feel his hands on my body. I kept telling myself: You have a boyfriend.

He tilted his head slightly, as if he was trying to read my mind.

The thought of his lips moving gently across my body as he slowly showered me with his attention did crazy things to my body. You. Have. A. Boyfriend.

I took a step closer to him. His smile faded for a brief second.