The Journey Home

I wanted him, and I was having a hard time fighting it. Damn him for being so sexy.

I took another step, but stopped there.

“Do you, um…do you want me to feed her while you go workout?” I asked.

I somehow managed to push my feelings down, back into that part of my heart that was forbidden.

Cale’s smile vanished, and his eyes filled with something I hadn’t seen in a while. Loneliness.

He came closer to me and looked down at my lips. I sucked in my lip and looked up into his eyes. “Is that what you want?” he barely whispered.

I knew what he wanted to hear. But my phone vibrated and I looked down to see Andre’s name flash across the screen.

I looked back up at Cale with a fake smile across my lips. “Yep. I think it would do you good to get out of the house.”

He looked down at my phone, shook his head, and then glanced back at me. He shoved the bottle and bib into my hands, turned, grabbed his keys, and left.

I’D BEEN SITTING at the bar for almost four hours. My phone went off again with yet another text message from Maddie.

Maddie: Okay, asshole. No one works out for four hours! Where the hell are you?

I set the phone down, ignoring the text. The dark-haired brunette down the bar had been eye-fucking me for an hour. With each beer I drank, and each shot I downed, she moved closer. I smiled as I caught her looking, again. She winked and I turned to Louie.

“Give me another shot, Lou, will ya?”

He shook his head. “Cale, do you have a ride home?”

I felt a hand slide down my back. “Yes, he does.”

I turned to see the brunette sitting down next to me. “My name’s Jackie. What’s your name, good looking?”

I smiled my crooked smile at her and replied, “Horny as fuck.”

She let out a fake laugh, making sure her tits bounced in just the right way. My dick jumped a little.

She ran her tongue along her teeth and hissed, “I bet I can take care of that for you, handsome.”

I placed my hand on the back of her neck and pulled her closer. “I bet you could.”

The memory of Maddie staring at me earlier popped into my head. I knew she’d been turned on. Her continuing to fight it did nothing but piss me off. I’d heard her in the guest room the other night, and I thought she was just getting herself off until I heard her whisper fucking Andre’s name. I heard his voice and realized that she had his ass on speakerphone—they were having phone sex. I’d stormed down the hallway and locked myself in Lily’s room. An hour later, I heard Maddie trying to get into the room. I knew she went to see Lily every night around two in the morning. There was no way I was going to let her into my daughter’s room.

Jackie ran her fingers though my hair. “Your place or mine, baby?”

I smiled. “Mine.”

JACKIE LAUGHED AS she pushed the door to my house open and we both stumbled in. I was so shit-faced that I knocked over a lamp, resulting in a loud crash. Jackie and I had stayed at the bar another couple hours and, after a few more drinks, we’d taken a taxi to my place.

I pushed her against the wall and kissed her hard as she moaned into my mouth. Then a light came on.

I heard Maddie gasp before she said, “What the hell?”

Jackie pushed me away. She looked at Maddie,—who happened to be holding Lily—then glared at me.

“Oh my God,” Jackie said. “You’re married? And you have a baby?”

Maddie was so pissed that I could almost see her whole body shaking. I threw my head back and laughed. “Hell, no. You see, Jackie, Maddie here thinks I’m not good enough for her. I’ve never been good enough for her. All she does is push me away.”

I saw the hurt flash in Maddie’s eyes.

Jackie stared. “Um, the baby?”

I smiled. “Oh, yeah…she’s mine.”

Jackie grabbed her purse. “She can’t be more than a week old, Cale.”

“Um…she’s almost three weeks,” I said.

Jackie pushed me and I fell over the back of the sofa, crashing onto the coffee table.

Lily started crying as Jackie approached Maddie. “I’m so sorry. I’d have never …oh God, I’m so sorry.”

She turned and made her way out the door. “Wait! Jackie, it’s not what you think!”

The door slammed and I just stood there, staring. I was too afraid to turn and face the wrath of Maddie. But I could feel her— I was pretty sure her eyes were shooting daggers.

“I’m going to go put Lily down in her crib once I get her back to sleep. Then you and I are going to talk.”

She spun around and walked up the stairs. I let out a breath and stumbled into the kitchen. I somehow managed to get coffee going and had almost drank a whole cup when Maddie came in.

“So, is that something Lily should expect often from her father? Bringing home a stray whore every now and then to fuck?”

I closed my eyes. “Go to hell, Maddie.”

“I’m already there, Cale.”

I turned and looked at her. “If you hate it here so much—hate me so much—there’s the door, sweetheart. Don’t let it hit your ass on the way out.”

She laughed as she came closer and poked me in the chest. “There is no way in hell you could do this without my help.”

I knocked her hand away. “I could, and I will…until I have to go back to work.”

“What? What do you mean?”

I turned and poured another cup of coffee. “I have to go back to work, Maddie. How the hell do you think I pay for all of this?”

I heard her sit down. “But…what about Lily? Who’s going to take care of her when you’re gone for weeks at a time?”

I shrugged. “I’ll hire a nanny I guess.”

“No,” she whispered. “Cale, why are you doing this?”

I slammed my mug down so hard that it broke into pieces. I turned and looked at the only girl I’d ever loved. The one I’d never be able to have.

“Because, Maddie,” I said. “I have a fucking job that takes me out of town for weeks at a time. I didn’t sign up for this shit. I didn’t ask for her! I didn’t ask for my life to be turned upside down.”

She jumped up. “You have a child now. You’re going to have to make changes. You’re all she has, Cale. You’re going to have to take another job. Work for your father or something.”

I took a step close to her. “I’m not working for my father. I have a fucking job! I want my old life back!” I yelled.

Maddie was startled, but she held firm. “Oh, boohoo for you. Your old life is gone. The only thing that matters is Li

ly. She’s all you have.”

I took a step back. Tears filled my eyes. “I know, Maddie. You don’t have to remind me. I know.”

I was walking away when she grabbed my arm. “What do you want from me?” she asked “I can’t say anything without you turning it against me. So I walked away from you. It was the biggest mistake of my life, but I can’t change the past. What do you want me to do?”

I grabbed her arms and shook her. “I want you to fucking admit you love me. I want you to admit that you want me as much as I want you.”

She stared at me. Her eyes said that she loved me, but her body stiffened as she looked away from me. “I can’t tell you that. I…I have a boyfriend and—”

I pulled her to me and slammed my lips against hers. I moved my tongue along her bottom lip, praying she’d open her mouth to me. She moaned and pushed her hands through my hair as her lips parted. Our tongues began to dance, gently at first, but soon becoming more heated. I pulled her body to mine and pushed my hard dick against her.

“Cale,” she whispered as she pulled her lips from mine.

I picked her up as she wrapped her legs around my body. I pushed her against the wall. I slipped my hand under her shirt and I moaned when I realized she wasn’t wearing a bra. Her hard nipples begged to be sucked.

“Jesus, Maddie. I want you.”

I pushed up her shirt and moved my lips down to her nipple and began sucking on it as she called out my name. I slipped my hand into her pants and then into her panties where my fingers teased her. She began pushing against my hand and I couldn’t wait another second. I pushed two fingers inside of her and was met with nothing but pure heat and wetness. She clamped down on my fingers and pulled them further in.

“You’re so fucking wet, Maddie.”

“Wait, Cale…we can’t…oh, God.”

The doorbell rang. It seemed to pull Maddie to her senses. I set her down as she pushed me away, pulling her shirt down. Her chest was heaving as she attempted to slow her breathing. The doorbell rang again. I turned away and headed to the door as I adjusted my rock-hard dick.