She needed comfort and I wanted to give it to her.
The tree snapping brought too many memories of Jasmine dying back. It was too close to feeling like a gunshot. So many unanswered questions as to what was actually going on. Guilt plagued me for getting Maren into this situation.
As we drove, my mind tried to fit the pieces together as to what was going on. An involuntary shudder went through her body.
“Maren, for what it’s worth, I’m sorry I came into your life and caused all this.”
She sniffled and looked my way. “I’m not.”
I was rendered speechless and something thawed within me. Focus, Bane. History cannot repeat itself. Jasmine and Faith came to mind as I remembered what it felt like as my baby fought to survive. My heart ached. Had Hampton been involved with Eric’s survival? Or was something else at play? Hampton had never seemed like a traitor and there’d been pure satisfaction in his eyes when Eric had been executed. What did they have on Hampton? Or had I completely misread him as a person?
Hell, I needed answers and all I was getting was more fucking questions.
I glanced at Maren again. She needed space to process as she watched out the window. Sarge sent me files the day after we’d talked as promised with a detailed dossier of his experience.
Eric Thornhill was a fucking thorn.
A few days after our conversation, a detailed brief had been uploaded with all of Eric’s whereabouts for the last six years. He’d been living in Mexico under the identity of David Churchill for the last five years. A year ago, he came back to the states.
Sarge believed he was closing in on Eric’s location in the Midwest. I assumed Hampton and Frankie were with him. Being centrally located meant that if they found me, they’d have a better chance of getting to me quicker.
For now, I wasn’t disclosing to Sarge that I’d heard Hampton there. Something deep within me … call it instinct, kept me from going there. If I was wrong, Hampton would pay the price.
When Eric was located, I was meeting up with the Black Division for one last hurrah. It would be surprising if anyone was still there that I’d worked with considering the survival rate. This time, when we located that son of a bitch, I was going to be the one to put a bullet in Eric Thornhill.
Maren didn’t know about these plans. I’d make sure she was safe before I left.
“Bane, how do you get past the hurt?” Her voice caught as she spoke.
Maren knew from my nightmare alone that I had issues. I looked at her and her red rimmed eyes softened me. “For me it was time and revenge.”
“Did revenge help?”
Had it helped completely? No. Hell what did I know about healing. “Probably not. But it gave me something to focus on. Maybe it never goes away but only dulls with time.”
“Have you tried forgiveness?”
“Forgiveness?”
Turning my way, Maren watched me, truly curious. “Yes, forgiving yourself for what happened to cause your nightmares. You’re a good man, Bane.”
“Some things aren’t worth forgiving. Would you forgive Frankie after all he’s done? He tried to whore you out for money.”
My words caused her to flinch and I regretted them, but couldn’t retract them. Maren challenged the very core of my existence. “Yes, I would. I’d forgive but never forget.”
Well hell, I had no words as we drove the rest of the way to the cabin in silence. Her words made me reflect. Forgiveness from the unforgivable. Was it deserved?
Maren knew I needed the silence as we got out of the vehicle and made our way into the cabin. I needed to make sure it was Hampton’s voice I heard on the other line before I threw out any accusations. I got my laptop and sat it on the arm of the couch as I downloaded the voice into my recognition software. Grabbing a blanket, Maren laid across my lap. The touch brought me comfort.
r /> Before long, Maren fell asleep. The progress bar was nearly done. I debated if my decision to not tell Sarge about Hampton was the right one. If I did, that meant I’d have to disclose Maren or lie. Lying was a worse offense than omission. The risk wasn’t worth it. I’d deal with Hampton on my own if he was indeed working for the other side. I hoped to hell he wasn’t.
The screen flashed green.
I clicked and it was one hundred percent confirmed to be Hampton.
Son. Of. A. Bitch.
Scrubbing a hand down my face, I had no idea how far this rabbit hole actually went. Glancing down at Maren, her eyes moved behind her eyelids rapidly. A grimace came on her face, then relaxed. Simply she whispered, “Choose me.”