“Tell Francesca I love her.”
Those won’t words of hope. Those were wo
rds of despair. No, no, no. I refused to believe the tone I was hearing from Carson. My voice grew stronger. “You’re going to tell her yourself, Carson.”
The darkness came again as I fought to keep my eyelids open. It was hard to stave off the tiredness that threatened to consume me. “I love you, too, Willow.”
I knew the impending exhaustion was about to win, but we needed to remain conscious. “Carson, fight. I love you, too. You’re my best friend.”
“I know, Willow.”
Our voices grew more tired. I knew it. He knew it. We needed to save our energy. I wanted to sleep.
“I love my baby, Willow. I want to be a father.” Now he sounded scared.
A half smile appeared since my energy had waned. “Tell him thank you for fighting and I love him.”
Tears filled Marie’s eyes. “I will, sweetheart.”
My eyes fluttered closed.
I stirred as the nurse adjusted the blood pressure cuff on my bicep. It was dark outside, like it had been the last few times I had awoken. After clearing my throat, I asked, “How long was I out?”
“Just a bit. I’m going to call the doctor. He wanted to run a few tests the next time you woke up. The Whitmores took your grandfather to the cafeteria to eat. I’ve been in here with you since they left about ten minutes ago.”
I readjusted myself slightly. “Good. Nonno needs to eat.”
She gave me a reassuring look. “He’s a sweet man.”
I shifted my legs. Everything was still so damn sore, like I’d been run over by a car. “How’s Carson?”
“We’ll get an update when they come back. I just came on shift.” Her hand lay on top of mine.
“Thank you.”
Another doctor came in the room. He was younger than the one earlier. Everything was still slightly hazy. A light was shined in my eyes and my reflexes were checked. “Things are looking better, Ms. Russo. It seems both you and your baby are fighters.”
I nodded and winced slightly. The doctor hadn’t missed it. “I’m going to give you something for the pain. It’s safe for the baby.”
“Thank you.”
Moments later, the nurse stuck a syringe into the IV, and fuzziness clouded my mind. Before I knew it, sleep claimed me once again. The more I slept, the faster tomorrow would be here for me to see Carson.
I awoke feeling more refreshed than I had the last few times. This was the longest day of my life. Each time I came to, Nonno and Bennett told me tomorrow hadn’t come yet when I asked to see Carson.
Apparently, I had only taken a nap.
Doctors checked me often. With the light bothering me, the shades were drawn. My diet was limited to liquid only.
Time wasn’t making much sense at this point. The ache in my body still hurt like a son of a bitch, but it had ebbed slightly.
The doctor came in, checked me, and then nodded to Nonno. Things were progressing and the baby was fine. “Nonno, when do I get to see Carson?”
“Today, baby girl.”
Excitement bubbled through me. I needed to see that my best friend was okay. The nurse came in with a breakfast tray. There were two roses on the tray next to the protein shake. “Those are beautiful.”
She pointed to the flowers. “I guess someone fancies you in the kitchen. Special treatment.”
Tack.
Had he been here?
I knew those were from him. They had to be. My arms were steadier as I reached for the petals and caressed them. He was watching me; I knew it. It was his way of saying he knew the baby and I were okay—the reason for two roses.
The Whitmores walked in, having changed from the clothes they’d been wearing.
Taking my shake, the nurse commented, “By dinner tonight you should be on solids.”
“Sounds good.” A weariness settled over the room. The mood instantly shifting
“What’s going on?” I cautiously asked.
Marie sat beside me and took one hand. Nonno took the other. Bennett’s head tipped downward before meeting my eyes.
This was bad.
Dread filled me. What happened?
Whatever came next was going to change my life forever. I felt it to my core. My eyes scanned everyone as the telltale monitor with my heart rate beeped faster. No one spoke. “Please tell me what’s going on… now.”
Nonno cleared his throat. “Carson sustained much worse injuries than you did. His seatbelt came undone and he was thrown around. He’s on life support.”
“No, no, no, no!” This wasn’t happening. No way was this real. I shook my head, ignoring the dull throb that reared its ugly head. My chin trembled. “You said… you made it seem.” I was close to hyperventilating when Bennett stepped in front of Marie. He gently took my face in his hands.
“Willow, I need you to breathe. In through your nose and out through your mouth.” He exaggerated the motions, and I followed. “Do it again.” I followed his instructions. “Listen, I get that we misled you, but we had to get you through the critical stages. The stress isn’t good for you or the baby.”
I followed his breathing again before I asked, “How much time has passed since I woke up?”
“Three days.”
“Th-three days? Three days?” They’d been playing this game with me for three fucking days! I was furious. I was tired of the games—all of them. Alex had manipulated me, and now they had, too. It hurt my family would distort the truth for three days. I stared at them, trying to comprehend.
Beep. Beep. Beep. My heart rate escalated.
“Willow, I need you to breathe with me,” Bennett said. I followed his motions. “The doctors aren’t going to let you see Carson if your vitals are all over the place. Carson needs you to be strong. He needs to hear your voice.”
He was right. I kept doing the deep breathing exercises. The beeping on the monitor slowed. “What’s wrong with him?”
Bennett ran a hand through his hair. “He had some internal bleeding. During the operation, he went into cardiac arrest three times. They had to put him on life support to stabilize him. His body couldn’t handle much more.”
Tears formed and cascaded down my face. There was no stopping them. “Were they able to get the bleeding to stop?”
“They think so. The brain swelling hasn’t gone down yet. We’re waiting for that, and then hopefully we’ll be able to tell more.”
My heart broke thinking of my best friend in the hospital… broken. I felt lost. Francesca.
“Where’s Francesca?”
“She’s up in ICU with Carson. Each person is allowed two hours a day for the time being.”
He was going to be a dad.
He was going to be a husband.
We were going to have our kids together.
The wheelchair squeaked against the linoleum as a nurse took me to ICU. For now, my movement was to be limited. Plus, I still had an IV attached to me. At this point, it was easier to be in the wheelchair than walk.
Seeing myself in the mirror, I’d been shocked at the face looking back at me. I had cuts and bruises from head to toe. My hand rested on my stomach. Thank goodness this baby was a fighter.
Thank you for not taking my baby.
The wheelchair stopped at the doors that led to ICU as the nurse signed me in. I overheard them say as soon as the young lady left we would be buzzed back.
Francesca came through the doors with a tear-streaked face. She stopped, apparently not expecting to see me. “Willow!” She rushed to my side and knelt beside me. “Thank goodness you’re okay. I’ve been so worried.”
Dark circles under her eyes confirmed how much this affected her, too. “How is he?”
She shook her head and grabbed my hand, unable to speak.
I reassured her. “Carson is a fighter. His last words were of how much he loved you and the baby.”
“I need him to fight, Willow. I can’t do this without him.”
She burst into sobs, and Marie was instantly by her side. I felt helpless in my whe
elchair. “Let’s get back to the hotel, dear. You need rest.”
Francesca nodded, and she was led away by the Whitmores without another word. She looked utterly broken. The wheelchair started to move again, and I held up my hands as my bottom lip quivered, fully realizing what I was about to see.
This was real.
Carson was hurt.
His life hung in the balance.
The nurse checked on me. “Ms. Russo. Are you okay?”
I shook my head. “I need a moment.”
A tear raced down my cheek, followed by another. My heart was broken—for all of us.
The nurse crouched down in front of me. “If this is too much, we can try again later.”
The doctor’s words about too much stress flitted through my head. I had to be strong, or they were going to take me back to my room.
I had to see Carson. I needed to see my best friend.
Forcing the tears away, I repeated the breathing exercise Bennett had done with me earlier. “I’m ready.”
The door buzzed open to the secure ICU area. I knew I had to remain outwardly calm though I was terrified on the inside. The wheels squeaked again.
This was hard.
Harder than I imagined now that I was here, in the moment, rolling down the hallway to his room. I bit my lip to stave off the tears. Carson needs me. Monitors beeped while patients lay motionless in their rooms.
This was my reality, yet it felt like a dream.
We stopped at the door to what I assumed was Carson’s room, and the nurse opened it.
I gasped and the tears fell against my will.
My sweet best friend lay broken in a bed, battered far worse than I was, a white gauze bandage wrapped around his head.
I must stay strong. I must stay strong. They cannot take me away yet. I need to see him.
The nurse touched my shoulder. “I know this is hard, but I truly believe it helps to talk to them.”
I nodded, unable to speak yet.
She rolled me closer to the bed. His only movement was the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest. The noise from the machines filled the silence. I wanted to see his blue eyes looking at me with love and him to tell me everything was going to be okay.