Well, not technically. You haven't heard anything. You've read something, but you haven't heard anything.
“Reed?”
“No. I haven't,” I said.
Could they get a search warrant for a minor's dorm room? Maybe they didn't even need one. Maybe they were searching it right now. Maybe they were just keeping me here while their goon squad tossed my stuff. I had to burn the note. I had to get back and burn the note now.
“I haven't.”
99
The detective and the chief stared at me for a long, long moment. Long enough for me to remember Ariana's advice that I should be prepared for this, that I should know what I was going to say. Long enough for me to start to sweat. Long enough to imagine what it might feel like to be loaded into the back of a police cruiser and taken downtown for further questioning.
Was this the reason for her warning? Was she just trying to make this experience easier on me? Maybe she didn't suspect me of anything. Maybe she was just trying to be nice.
Damn. Why didn't I listen to her?
“You're sure.”
“I haven't.”
They were the only two words I could think or say.
I haven't. I haven't, I haven't, I haven't. If I made myself believe it, maybe they would too.
“Okay, then, Miss Brennan,” the chief said finally. “Thank you for your time.”
100
MODEL FRIEND
When I walked out of the office I felt hollow. I felt like I had been used up, wrung dry, and tossed aside. I felt like I needed a nap. I shut the door behind me, leaned back against the cool brick wall, and let out a breath. I looked up at the ceiling, where a frosted- glass light fixture hummed.
Dear God, please let Thomas come back soon. Or call someone. Anything. I just want this to be over.
'You okay?"
Kiran stood up from the wooden bench directly across the hall, unfolding her long legs and snapping her compact closed. Her makeup was freshly applied, with a new coat of shimmering lip balm and ten miles of lengthening mascara. As always, she looked as if she'd just stepped off a runway in Milan, whereas I probably looked like I'd just been run over by a jumbo jet on a whole different kind of runway. In Detroit.
“What are you doing here?” I asked, my heart in my throat. I had thought I was alone.
101
She looked at me as if I had just suggested she switch to Cover Girl. “I wanted to see if you were okay. God. Sorry for the intrusion.”
“You wanted to see if I was okay?” I asked, stupefied.
'Yes. I heard you were next up on the list and I thought, you know, that this might be . . . difficult for you,“ she said, almost reluctantly. ”But if you want to be alone ..."
She flicked her bangs away from her eyes and turned down the hall. I stopped her with a hand on her arm. The velvet of her jacket was so soft I instantly withdrew, afraid I might damage it.
“No. That's okay,” I said. “Thanks for coming.”
Of all the Billings Girls, I would have thought Kiran would be the last one to publicly display any kind of affection. For me, anyway.
She looked me up and down and flashed a hint of a smile. “No problem. Come on. Before Naylor catches me outside of class. Woman has been trying to snag me all year.”
Together we speed-?walked down the hall and into the back stairwell. The very same stairwell I had raced through on the night she and her friends had ordered me to steal them a physics test from one of the downstairs offices.