"She does have certain hawklike qualities," Josh said, looking over at her. My dorm mother was cutting her food into tiny morsels and lifting them to her pinched lips with clipped, precise movements. "We can go to my dorm."

"Please. Mr. Cross will totally hear us," I said. "You're the only one in the entire building. He's got nothing to distract him."

"Reed, look at the man. He's about four hundred years old. If he gets enough turkey in him, he'll pass out before he even gets to Ketlar."

I glanced over my shoulder. Mr. Cross lifted a napkin to wipe gravy from his moustache. Then he took a second helping of turkey. Seconds already.

"Looks like we're good to go, then," I said with a smile.

Josh smiled back. "Looks like."

158

A SOFT PILLOW

"So, wait. You've never broken a bone? Not one?" Josh asked in awe as we approached Ketlar. "How is that possible?"

The air was crisp and cold, and ten thousand stars winked at us from above. I tipped my head back and turned around, feeling heady and drunk, even though there wasn't an ounce of alcohol in my system. I was practically tingling from the novelty of the evening--the campus so deserted and still, the amazing food, laughing nonstop with Josh through dinner with no one watching me. Plus there was the anticipation of what might be to come. Maybe nothing. Maybe something. I didn't want to think about it too hard. That always seemed to ruin things.

"Perfect balance, stunning athleticism, fear of hospitals," I replied. "Why? Have you?"

I put my arms out and turned in a circle, enjoying the feeling of my hair down my back, the feeling of freedom I was experiencing. Savoring every minute of it.

"Are you kidding? I was a menace as a kid. Falling out of trees,

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falling off of bikes, falling down stairs. If it was in my sight, I fell off of it. You should have seen the time I broke my pinky. The bone was completely sticking out the side of my hand. My brother even threw up. It was totally wicked," he rambled nervously. He shoved his hands into his coat pockets and shivered, bouncing a little on his toes.

I bit my lip to keep from grinning too hard. I was making him nervous. Clearly, he wanted something to happen here. His manic behavior was giving it all away.

"I even broke my jaw!" he announced, like it was an achievement.

"Really? How?"

"That's what happens when parents drag their kids to country houses where there's nothing to do," Josh told me. "It was in Litchfield. Lynn and I were bored, so we tried to break the sound barrier on my Razor scooter. There was a brick missing in the sidewalk and I went airborne. A bike rack broke my fall. Excruciating. Excruciating! Plus I had to have my mouth wired shut for, like, ever."

I cracked up laughing, stopped twirling, and fell sideways into Josh, nearly knocking us both over.

"Oh, yeah. You have perfect balance," Josh said, laughing as well.

For some reason this made me double over and gasp for breath. I felt like Josh was somehow feeding me laughing gas. No guy had ever had that effect on me before.

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"Get it together, Brennan. We're supposed to be stealth here," he teased.

"You're the one who hasn't shut up since we left dinner," I pointed out.

He stared at me for a second, his eyes searching mine, back and forth, back and forth, like they couldn't figure out what to focus on. "Right. You're right. Sorry. I'll stop now."

"No. It's okay," I said, laying a hand on his arm. "Let's just both whisper from here on out."

"Good plan. Good plan," Josh said.

He reached for the door and held his finger to his lips, widening his eyes comically. I nodded and tried not to laugh. Together we slipped inside and Josh held the heavy door until it closed, making sure the click was minimal. Inside, he pointed at Mr. Cross's door and once again widened his eyes in warning. Ever so quickly, we tiptoed past the closed door. The second we were in front of it, a giggle welled up in the back of my throat. I slapped my hand over my mouth. What was wrong with me? Did sneaking around really make me this giddy? Doing it with the Billings Girls had never had this effect.

Of course, none of them was as cute as Josh, nor did they smell as good.

Tags: Kate Brian Private
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