“Nothi—”
“Don’t li
e, what you just said is not something you would say in normal conversation. And besides that, you never call me before work, and I can hear it in your voice—something happened. So tell me.”
He was silent for a few heavy moments, and in that time I felt the blood draining from my face.
“There are just times when I need to hear your voice. I need to be able to talk to you because I can’t see you . . . and I just need you.” He cursed away from the phone. “For so many reasons.”
I worried my bottom lip as I waited for anything else he might have to say, but there was nothing. “You’re scaring me,” I admitted softly.
“I want to be able to give you everything, Kamryn . . . and it kills me that I’m in a situation where I can’t. But you know what makes it that much harder? I feel like I don’t know how to get out of the situation and get through all this bullshit without you right there. Right. Fucking. There. By my side. But because of the circumstances, I have to find a way.”
“Brody . . .”
“And sometimes that just feels impossible.”
My chest ached for him, and it felt like I was struggling to stay standing as I listened to him admit all this to me. “Tell me what happened,” I pleaded.
“Nothing,” he finally replied. “Nothing happened, sweetheart. I’m just trying to figure out a way for this all to go away for us, and some days it seems harder than others. I wanted to vent and hear your voice. That’s all.”
My lips tilted up slightly, but that sickening feeling like he wasn’t telling me everything wasn’t lessening.
Brody
June 17, 2015
STEPPING INTO THE kitchen late that night after work, I froze when I saw Olivia sitting at the table.
“Brody, I—” She cut off on a sob and dropped her head into her hands, her entire body shaking with the movements. “I’m so sorry.”
I didn’t make a move toward her, and I didn’t say anything. It was all I could do to keep from clenching my jaw so hard that it felt like it was about to break. My hands curled into fists, and I crossed my arms over my chest to keep them close. I wouldn’t touch her, but I didn’t trust myself to not throw whatever was closest to me right now.
“They made me do it, you have to believe me. They made me say you planted it! I didn’t want to, but you know how my parents are.”
My eyebrows shot up at her desperate plea for me to believe her. Tears included, this was the sanest I’d seen Liv in years. “What are you saying, Olivia?”
“I didn’t—couldn’t do it anymore. I wanted to be with Tate,” she sobbed and clutched at her chest. “I can’t deal with this pain, Brody. It’s killing me! So I-I-I just took them all.”
Walking over to the kitchen table, I pulled out the chair closest to her and sat down. Leaning forward, I grabbed her arms as gently as possible, and pulled them back when she tried to cover her face again. “Olivia . . . what? No, the report came back. The doctor said you didn’t have any of it in your system.”
“They must have something on him, or paid him off . . . something! They told me they couldn’t have this ruining their family name, so they needed to make it seem like a medical condition. But, Brody, I swear I didn’t know they were going to try to throw the blame on you! I’m so sorry.”
I shook my head back and forth and leaned back in the chair. “No. No way. Liv, you’re just as manipulative as they are. The things you’ve been telling them—no. I’m not falling for this shit again,” I said as I stood to leave.
“Brody, please!”
“How do you expect me to believe you after everything you’ve done since we got married, Olivia?!” I yelled, and she flinched back in her seat. “I’ve excused your behavior, I’ve looked the other way, and I’ve tried to get you help. But no matter what I do, you and your parents are right there trying to screw me over for it.”
“I didn’t want to admit I needed help! I didn’t want to admit I was that weak!” she cried, her voice breaking on the last word. “I’m telling you, and I’ve told you—I can’t do this. But my parents . . . they don’t understand, and—and—what was I supposed to do, Brody? I couldn’t tell them that I wanted to die! I couldn’t tell them I didn’t have the will to live anymore, so I just put it off on you. I’m sorry for that, but it just seemed easiest at the time.”
“Seem—seemed easiest?!” Raking my hands roughly through my hair, I turned and took a few steps before turning back toward her. “Are you fucking kidding me? They tried to get me fired! They tried to get my peace officer license taken away, Liv!”
“They may have acted on things too harshly, but they were doing what they thought was best for their name, and for me. They’re just trying to protect me!”
“I don’t give a shit what they thought they were doing! The three of you—no! The four! You, your parents, and their attorney have been ruining my life. All of this has got to stop, do you hear me? You need to tell your parents what’s happening with you. You need to tell them that you’re suicidal, Liv. And you need to let me get you some help!”
She cried harder and shook her head back and forth. “I can’t! It would be such an embarrassment to them!”