“I understand,” she said quietly, pulling her hands back.
“Kat... If it were just me, I would say to hell with the press. I would stand on the street corner and hand out newspapers saying I was dating you.” AJ’s blue eyes peered into hers. “But, it’s not just me. This company employees thousands of people. Every single one of them is depending on me to keep us out of the muck Paul put us in.”
AJ paused and Kat tried to think, but her thoughts were swirling with only AJ as her anchor. Kat didn’t know how the particular shade of blue of his eyes could enchant her so completely. It probably had to do with that she saw a good man in those eyes. A man she wanted to be with. A man she was falling in love with faster than she ever could have thought possible. He was trying to do the right thing for thousands of people. Who could possibly blame him for wanting her to be a little more careful when those lives were on the line?
“With our stock price plummeting, I can’t afford to keep some of our locations open. If our publicity doesn’t get better, I’m going to have to start letting people go.” AJ sighed. “I hate that I’m going to take people’s livelihoods.”
Kat thought of her own parents. When she was a child, her father had suddenly been let go from the company he had worked at. She still remembered the stress of him searching for a new job while her mother picked up odd jobs that she could do from home in order to keep them in their house.
“I understand, AJ,” Kat said, reaching for one of his hands and squeezing them reassuringly. “I really do. You have to take care of your employees.”
He nodded. “I don’t want to lose you in the process, though. We just need to be more careful. Once this sex scandal blows over, we won’t have to worry as much.”
“Of course,” she agreed, putting her free hand on her belly. She was going to wait to tell him. Today wasn’t the right timing.
“You’re allowed to be angry with me, Kat,” he said. “In fact, I wish you were. It would be easier than having you look at me with those sad eyes.”
“How can I be angry with you when you’re just making sure that families keep food on their tables?” She looked up at him and smiled. “I know you want to be with me, but the situation makes it hard. You’ll just have to find a way to make it up to me.”
“I will, Kat,” he assured her. “This company is my life. I don’t know anything else. I hate what’s happening to it right now. At least he didn’t get either of them pregnant. Who knows how bad that would have been.”
Kat’s heart went through the floor and down to the basement.
“Yeah..” she agreed, her voice cracking.
There was no way she was going to be able to tell him about the pregnancy. Not now.
AJ grinned and wrapped his arms around her. “Thank you,” he whispered, pulling her closer to him. He seemed to be taking solace in her embrace which just made her feel even more guilty. “I promise I’ll make it up to you.”
Kat pushed her face into his chest, breathing in the scent of him. It was strange, but the smell seemed to settle her stomach. However, it did nothing to ease the ache of guilt.
The beep of the intercom caused them both to pull back.
“Yes?” AJ asked, leaning over his desk and pressing the button.
“The lawyers are here, sir,” his secretary informed him.
Weight settled around his shoulders and the happy light left his beautiful blue eyes. He sighed and stood up straight.
“Congratulations on the project. I’m proud of you,” he said, kissing her cheek gently. “Maybe we can have dinner tomorrow? I’m unfortunately stuck here tonight.”
“Dinner tomorrow would be great,” Kat replied before she could think better of it. She pulled him into another hug. “It’ll be okay.”
She wasn’t sure if she was telling him or herself.
26
Kat
Equal parts guilt and nausea waged inside Kat as she pulled up to the front door of AJ’s home. She thanked the driver and stepped out into the warm sunshine. She was just glad she didn’t have to drive herself. The morning sickness was getting worse and doing anything other than praying to the porcelain god was difficult.
But, she wanted to see AJ. Needed to see AJ. Even though she knew she couldn’t tell him why she was feeling so miserable, at least not just yet, she knew he would do everything in his power to make her feel better. Just being around him made her feel better.
The late July sunshine was disgustingly hot. It was dinner time, yet she felt she might melt under the sun’s rays. It made her feel even more woozy and weak, and she wished she had something more than a few sips of water keeping her up and moving for the day.
“Are you okay?” AJ asked, opening the door. He quickly ushered her inside. The air conditioning felt so much better after the heat.
“I’m fine.” The lie was an easy one. It was one all women say.