So Good

Stephan looked at me again. “You look like shit.”

My face throbbed at the mention of the fight, but I welcomed the pain. I deserved it.

For a few moments, the only sound was all the noise pollution surrounding us. And then Stephan straightened and crossed his arms over his chest.

“I fucked up by not telling you, Stephan.”

He stayed silent.

“I love you. You’re my brother, my family, but I won’t let her go. I can’t. I love her enough to deal with any repercussion being together causes.”

Stephan exhaled, sounding defeated.

“I’ve never loved anyone the way I love her, Stephan. She’s it for me.”

“It’s wrong,” my brother said again, as if he wanted to say it over and over again. I couldn’t blame him.

“It doesn’t feel wrong.”

Stephan closed his eyes and shook his head.

The silence stretched out between us for a few seconds. There was a hell of a lot I wanted to talk about, but didn’t know what to say that hadn’t already been spoken.

And still Stephan remained silent.

“It was wrong to do it behind your back, but that’s the only thing I’m apologizing for. Because what I feel for Ivy is real.”

Stephan stared at me. “I know you care about her, but see it from my point of view.”

I did.

“I know you need time to process all of this, to understand it even, and I can give you that time.” I felt my body grow harder. “But hear me on this, Stephan. You can beat my ass and I won’t fight back, but I won’t let her go.”

I’d said all I could. It was up to Stephan to know that it was the truth.

“I don’t know whether I can be okay with this.” He ran a hand over the back of his head. “She’s my daughter, Matthew. You’re my—”

“I know,” I said softly. “Believe me. I beat myself up over it for so long it was eating away at me.”

“A part of me wants to pack her up and get her the fuck out of here. I want to protect her.”

“So do I,” I said with determination in my voice.

We stared at each other for long moments.

“I love her, Stephan. I’ll take care of her with my life.”

“People won’t understand,” he said instantly.

I shook my head. “They don’t have to. No one has to understand because it’s no one else’s business. The only opinion we care about is yours, Stephan. That’s all that matters.”

23

Ivy

I found my father working on his car in the garage, the sound of classic rock pumping through an old, outdated radio he had sitting on his workbench. The banging of a tool hitting the cement seemed overly loud, but not as loud as my heart racing.

It had been several days since he’d found out about Matthew and me, and although we hadn’t ignored each other, I definitely felt the tension between us.

I took another step into the garage, seeing his big body hunched under the hood of his car. He cursed and pulled back, shaking his hand and looking down at it. And then he glanced over at me, a momentary expression of surprise covering his face before he masked it.

“Hey,” I said softly and smiled.

“Hey,” he said roughly and went over to his workbench to grab another tool.

More silence descended and I felt the awkwardness grow. I twisted my hands in front of me, looking down at them, hating that there was this wall between us. I couldn’t blame him, but I wished he would talk to me about it.

I heard him clear his throat and I glanced up, seeing him lean against his workbench, his arms crossed over his chest and his focus on me.

“We should probably talk about this, right?” His voice was pitched low, but it was gentle, maybe even understanding.

I nodded, not trusting my voice in that moment. But silence wouldn’t solve anything. “Although I don’t know where to start,” I finally said.

“I’m not sure either, sweetheart,” he said softly. “But I spoke with Matthew. He pretty much told me everything.” He looked down at his boots and exhaled again. “It’s hard to grasp, I won’t lie. But at the end of the day, I just want you to be happy.” He looked up at me again and I swallowed roughly. “I just want to know that you’re taken care of, that you succeed in life, and that you’re loved. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

God, I was going to cry if this kept up.

“Your happiness has been the only thing that I’ve ever been concerned about, Ivy. It’s why I kept my relationship with Cora from you for longer than I should have. That’s why I didn’t tell you about me losing my job right away.” He shook his head slowly and stared me in the eyes. “Because I figured that would be a blow to your happiness, and I didn’t want that.”