Once We Were Starlight

Rise into the sky. Those words. I’d heard them before. I had the sudden flash to the instructions that Zakai had hidden beneath his pillow. The instructions on how to fly a plane.

My fear spun wildly, tears still tracking down my cheeks. And yet, a sense of calm also began to descend. Zakai had a plan. Free yourself, he was saying, and go to the desert. Meet me at the plane.

He was going to attempt to fly us high into the sky, on a plane he’d only read about on a piece of paper.

A suicide mission.

Hopeless.

And our only choice.

I was dragged from the room as Zakai was wrestled away, our arms reaching for each other, but no cries on our lips. A wild hope clutched at my breast as I gazed upward, my eyes imploring the stars. Help us get free so that we might escape and find each other under your great glow.

As I sat in the candlelit room, awaiting the desert-colored man who had purchased my time, I dried my tears. He might have purchased my body, but he had no right to my soul. I heard Zakai’s bellow from beyond and put my hand over my mouth, biting the tender skin of my palm so as not to scream. I couldn’t imagine what Zakai was feeling—the terror, the fear—not knowing what he’d see or hear from where they held him. We were both bound, though not both by chains. Startled, I jumped to my feet as the door opened, letting out a quiet cry to see that it was Tal, the eldest of the contortionists with a voice as sweet as golden honey.

“Oh, poor Karys,” she said, rushing toward me and wrapping me in an embrace.

I found momentary comfort in the warmth of her arms before pulling back. “They have Zakai outside, chained to the wall,” I said in an exhale of panicked breath. “They’re going to hurt him. They already have . . .” I hiccupped, unable to continue.

“Shh,” she said softly, stroking my hair. “Zakai is smart. Zakai is strong and cunning. He will survive.”

I nodded briskly, wanting to believe. “A man has purchased me, Tal. I’ve never been with another man. Perhaps he’s like Berel—”

“I don’t believe it. He doesn’t look cruel. You will be fine.” And though I wanted to hope, when she turned away, I saw her swipe at her tears. “Think of the song, my darling. About the little bird finding her voice. Pretend we are in the courtyard and I am singing it to you. Feel the sun on your skin and smell the sweetness of the ripe persimmons. Go there in your mind, my love, and nothing or no one can touch you while you are away. Now, let me clean you so you look presentable.”

Tal wiped my face with a soft cloth and reapplied the kohl, helping me to bathe and rubbing sweet almond oil on my skin until it shone in the candlelight. She then left me quickly, and I heard the quiet sound of her choked cry as she moved away, into the night.

Moments later, the fabric over the door was pushed aside, and the desert-colored man entered the room. I stood frozen, my eyes wide and my hands clasped in front of me.

His brow wrinkled and he dropped the curtain back into place, glancing behind him once and then approaching me slowly. “Your name is Karys?” His accent was strange, but he spoke in English, a language I knew almost as well as my native tongue. He was older than me and Zakai, but not as old as Haziq.

“Y-yes,” I answered.

He held out his arm. “I’m Cody Rutland.” I stared at his hand, unsure what he was waiting for me to do, remembering the gesture that I sometimes saw Haziq perform. I reached out, grasping his palm.

“Cody Rutland,” I repeated.

“You’re shivering, Karys. Please don’t be afraid of me. I’m here to help.”

To help? What did that mean? Outside Zakai’s bellowing yells started up once again and I grimaced as he called my name, the heavy sounds of chains being lifted and beat against the stone. He sounded like the winter wind, as though he alone might tear our small world down, brick by brick, with his rage-filled wrath.

The man, Cody Rutland, turned his head, looking in the direction from which Zakai’s yells were coming. I stared at him, the anguish most assuredly plain on my face as we then heard the sounds of a struggle, of a loud crack, and then Zakai’s cries were no more. I let out a choked whimper that I couldn’t hold back and Cody stepped forward. “Karys, I’m here to help,” he repeated.

“Help, how?” I asked on a breath.

He nodded to the bed of pillows. “Please. Sit down.”

I swallowed, hesitating, but doing as he said. What else could I do? Fight him? To what end? He was twice my size and Haziq’s bodyguards were not far away. Please be what Tal said you were. Please be kind.