Once We Were Starlight

But if he is kind, why is he here? Sundara’s customers were not known for their kindness.

Cody Rutland paused, appearing to struggle with the words on his tongue. Distant moans caught my attention and I gasped as Zakai began to yell again, though with less vigor than before. Still, my heart rose to my throat and a breath of relief parted my lips. He was alive. The rattling chains and sounds of a beating came moments later, followed by silence once again, the rest from his yells both a comfort and a horror.

“He’s a fighter, isn’t he?” Cody Rutland murmured as he came to sit beside me.

“Y-yes,” I said, eyeing him. My thoughts spun. Zakai told me to get free, and meet him in the desert. Zakai is strong, but they’ve taken his strength away. How will he meet me now? Will this man hurt me? Will he touch me how Zakai touches me? Sickness rose in my throat and I wrapped my arms around myself.

The man sighed, plucking a grape from a dish next to the bed. “Karys, do you know what sex trafficking means?”

I tried to focus on his words as a shiver of fear rolled through me. Sex trafficking. I shook my head.

He popped a grape into his mouth and chewed. “It means what’s happening here is illegal and that Haziq Hadid is a criminal. You are a victim of his crimes.”

I stared at him. I had no knowledge of those words.

Cody Rutland stared at me for a moment and then released a breath. “You’re going to have to trust me, Karys. Others are coming to help. They’re on their way, but it’ll be a little while. This must be done right. It might be hours.”

“Hours,” I said. I knew hours now. A measure of time. There were twenty-four hours in a day, and the remaining twelve of this one stretched before me like a looming shadow as the sun disappeared.

“What are you going to do with me?” I asked meekly.

“I’m not going to do anything with you. But I will need to make some sounds, if we’re going to convince the men with guns outside that things are going as they expect they are.” He took in my confused stare for a moment and then continued. “It’s also important that I’m convincing if your . . . friend out there is going to stay alive and intact. They want him to suffer, and our pretending will keep him safe.”

I swallowed, nodding, hope flaring in my breast. He’s not going to touch me? He’s not going to hurt me? “Keep him safe,” I repeated. I’d do anything toward that end. I’d sell my soul for Zakai if I was asked.

Cody Rutland nodded once and then made a moaning sound that made me blink and look away, heat infusing my skin. It sounded as if I’d pleasured him and yet he was halfway across the room.

Outside, Zakai’s chains began rattling viciously and his yells took up again. I heard the laughter of Haziq’s men somewhere close by. I clenched my eyes shut, my ribs squeezing tight.

They want him to suffer, and our pretending will keep him safe. Cody Rutland was making sounds as if we were mating so that the guards would continue to enjoy Zakai’s pain. As long as they were having fun, Zakai’s life would be spared. I let out a squeal of pain. Zakai yelled and raged, and the guards shrieked with laughter.

It went on like that for what seemed like forever, my heart crying inside me, my soul numb, my only reprieve coming after Zakai became so unruly that the guards could be heard beating him once more. Then silence would descend and later the blessed wails that told me he was still alive. Still fighting. But for how much longer? No one could survive that kind of continued beating, could they? And if he died, I would die. A star could not live with only one half. Its light would fade to nothing and blink to darkness.

Cody Rutland grew tired, finally taking a seat on the cushions near the door. I sat down too, and though my eyes were so heavy I could barely keep them open, I refused to sleep. If Zakai was still fighting, so would I . . . in the only way that I could.

Stay alive. Keep him safe.

And yet, I knew that while his body might be spared, this night was killing his soul.

A shadow moved behind the curtain and I sucked in a startled breath, Cody Rutland and I coming to our feet at the same moment. Cody reached for something in the back of his pants but before he could grab it, a heavy pot came down on his head and he crumpled to the floor.

Zakai stood behind him, his face mangled, but fire gleaming from the depths of his swollen gaze. My heart lurched and I let out a strangled cry as I clapped my hands across my mouth.