“Flying a helicopter was his dream. But when he left the army and faced the fact that he had four mouths to feed, he stuck with the family trucking business. He still found a way to take me and my brothers up in a helicopter and teach us the ropes.”
“You could enlist,” she said. “The army is always looking for pilots.”
Chad shook his head. “Logging is in my blood. This place, this land—I love it here. I know it doesn’t sound like much of a dream, flying around the forest and hauling out trees, but it’s mine.”
Who was she to challenge a person’s hopes and dreams? Lena slid another quarter of the more-peanut-butter-than-jelly sandwich out of the bag and took a bite. Her goals for the future included finding a job and maybe, if she could push past her fears, accepting a Silver Star for serving her country.
And finding her way back to that moment last night, when she’d hovered on the edge of an orgasm . . .
When he’d touched her, awakening her desires with his words, this charming man had offered a glimpse at what the future could hold for her. Maybe she was finally starting to recover from the shattering trauma of surviving in a war zone. Or maybe it was this man, and his wicked demands, that had delivered her one step closer to normal.
“What if you knew it was just for show? What if it was clear from the start that rings and promises were not part of the deal?” She lowered the sandwich to her lap, her gaze fixed on Chad’s chiseled, too-good-to-be-true features. “What if I pretend to be your girlfriend?”
“A fake relationship?” Chad blinked and stole a quick glance at Hero as if checking in with her canine companion to see if she’d lost her mind before looking back at her. But her dog remained focused on his toy.
“We could go out on dates and hopefully change this town’s perceptions of you. At least until you find a copilot.”
“Lena, I appreciate the offer. But I’m not sure that’s the best idea—”
“It is,” she said. “Everyone sees me as damaged and untouchable. They would never guess it was just for show.”
His brow furrowed. “You really want to do this? Go out to dinner with me and let Independence Falls think we’re dating?”
“Yes. But I have an ulterior motive.” She drew a deep breath. “I want our relationship to be real at night. When we’re alone.”
Chapter 6
CHAD FOCUSED ON the smudge of peanut butter on Lena’s cheek. Nine times out of ten, he could read a woman’s signals and follow her words, even if she said one thing and meant another. But with Lena, he needed clarification. It was like flying over a logging site. A little bit to the left led to trouble when you had a giant metal hook hanging down and a person on the ground trying to grab it.
“I’m going to need you to spell out what you’re asking for,” he said.
She looked him straight in the eyes. For the first time since he’d met this mysterious, intriguing woman by Eric’s pond, he saw a soldier. The wealth of determination in her expression blew him away.
“I know last night didn’t end well—”
“You’re the first woman who has ever pulled a gun on me in the sack.”
“You’re the first man to touch me and leave me wishing for more in nearly eighteen months,” she countered. “More if you count the fourteen months I spent in Afghanistan.”
“Wow,” he muttered, his mouth full of fake meat. What the hell else was there to say to that? “Wait, you think I healed you?”
Because if she thought last night had ended well . . . shit, what the hell had her sex life been like before she’d gone to war?
“No. But you made me think I’m closer to normal,” she said softly. “And that’s my dream. I love Hero, but I hate the fact that I need him. And—”
She drew a deep breath, her gaze dropping to the blanket. He had a feeling there was so much more she wasn’t telling him. “And we have chemistry. I want you to touch me and whisper dirty things in my ear.”
Chad let out a slow breath, running his hands through his hair. “Lena, I’d like to help you. And for selfish reasons, I’d love to take you up on your offer. I want to fly almost as much as I want to breathe. But I’m not so sure I’m the right guy. I don’t know the first thing about what you’re going through. I never served. And aside from hanging out with Georgia, I don’t know anything about PTSD.”
“I’m not asking you to be my shrink,” she said. “I have one of those. I want you to be my lover, or at least try. And I’ll do my best to convince Independence Falls that we’re dating. Of course, if the thought of sex with me turns you off—”
“No.” He wanted to agree to her plan. It was as crazy as flying blind over a forest, but part of him wished he could make Lena his.
“If we do this,” he said, in his best no-nonsense voice, “I don’t set the limits. You do. Understood?”
She nodded.
“I’m game for anything. I want you, Lena. But I think we both know this is shaky ground. Promise me, you’ll tell me no whenever you need to say the word. I don’t need a reason. And I swear, I’ll always listen.”