“Kas,” Cree says slowly, “would you like me to tie you up?”
“Yeah.” I clear my throat so I can speak more clearly and turn my attention back to him. “Yes, I think I do. I mean, if you want to.”
Chapter 5—Cree
My heart begins to pound in my chest. Though I recognized my attraction to her, and I’d hoped that she might be intrigued enough by our conversation that she’d consider maybe giving it a shot sometime, I wasn’t expecting our conversations to go in this direction so quickly. Now that Kas is asking, I can feel my excitement increase by the second.
I also know this is all new to her, and I need to take it very slowly and carefully, or I will completely screw this up.
“Yes, Kas.” I speak slowly and softly as I reach over and take her hand. “I would very much like to tie you up. Are you sure you want to, though? I don’t want you to do something just because of the stress you’re feeling right now.”
“You said it might make me feel better.”
“It might, but that’s not a given.” I feel like I’m walking a very thin line. I’m thrilled that she’s interested in tying, but I don’t want to make her any promises that it will help lessen her fear. Responses are so individualized.
“I’d like to give it a try.”
I try to read her body language and expression, but I’m afraid my own desire is getting in the way, and I’m only seeing what I want to see. Her eyes are already dilated from the low light, so that’s not any help. She’s breathing heavier than normal, but that could also be from stress, not anticipation.
Why am I trying to come up with reasons not to do this?
Because I don’t want to ruin this. I want her to feel more comfortable, not less, and I don’t know how she’s going to react. I’m used to people coming up to me who have some idea about what they want from rope, and Kas has no idea what she’s getting into. I could be a great first experience for her as long as I’m perfect, and perfect isn’t easy.
No pressure.
I let out a long, shuddering breath to calm myself.
“All right,” I say, “but I have to demand total honesty from you. If at any point you feel like it isn’t helping, that you’ve made the wrong choice or you are at all uncomfortable, you must tell me. Is that clear?”
“Yes.” She clears her throat a little. “I promise.”
“Let’s negotiate a little,” I say. After my speech about negotiating, I’d feel like a hypocrite if
I didn’t practice what I preached. I move around until I’m sitting cross-legged in front of her and then give her a moment to mimic my pose. “This can be as simple or as complex as you like. I’m going to start with simple since you haven’t tried this before. If you like it, we can always do something more complex later.”
“Okay.” Kas looks down at the floor.
As much as I enjoy her naturally submissive pose, I need to know for sure what she really wants from me. I reach out and place my fingers under her chin, tilting her head until she’s looking into my eyes.
“This is about what you want,” I say, “not what I want. Rope is naturally intimate and sensual. I will have to touch you in order to tie you, but if there are places you want me to avoid, I absolutely will. I want you to be comfortable.”
“I don’t mind if you touch me.”
“Anywhere?”
“Anywhere,” she whispers, blushing. “Am I supposed to, um, take my clothes off?”
“You don’t have to,” I tell her. “I can work with whatever, and since you’re wearing a tank top, that won’t be in the way at all. The only issue is if you’re wearing an underwire bra.”
“I am.”
“I prefer it if you take that off,” I tell her. I open up my backpack and continue to speak as I pull out five coiled ropes. “If you aren’t comfortable with that, you can leave it on. It just restricts what I can do. The shirt can stay. Clothing in general is not a problem, but I don’t want the underwire to press too hard against you. I can control where the rope goes, not so much the underwire.”
“So I just take my bra off?”
“Whatever you’re comfortable with, really. Leave it on if the idea makes you nervous. It just limits what I can do.”
“I can take it off.” She looks away from me. “Not sure I understand why, but it’s not a problem.”