“Sometimes you just can’t go back, Duncan,” she told him, her face filled with such sadness that he couldn’t bear it. He reached out and grabbed hold of her hand. “Three years have passed, Duncan. We can’t recreate what we had.”
“We don’t need to have the same relationship we had before, Laken.”
“But you would need to be in charge,” she told him. “You would need to go to the club, to tie me up, to dominate me.”
What the hell had happened to put such fear in her face? Had that asshole Ricky done something to her to put her off something she used to love?
“I need you. I can do without everything else.”
Laken snorted and shook her head. “I know you. Since I’ve been back, how many times have you tried to boss me around?”
“For all the good it’s done me, you used to be far more obedient.”
“I used to be a pushover. I was young and didn’t know my own mind. I do now.”
He stepped away slightly. “Are you saying that I forced you into something you didn’t really want?” She had loved being his submissive. At least he thought she had.
“No,” she told him. “You would never have forced me into something I didn’t want. But it’s not what I want now. Do you see? We can’t be anything more than friends, Duncan. Anything more just wouldn’t work.”
Duncan thought furiously. She wasn’t denying that she wanted him. Just that she couldn’t handle that side of their relationship.
“Why not? What are you scared of?”
Panic filled her eyes and she grew so pale that he reached for her, worried that she was going to faint.
“Why does there have to be a reason? I have the right to say no.”
Duncan stared at her for a long moment, knowing that she was trying to hide her fear behind her temper. He needed to figure out what the hell was going on with her and there was no way that would happen if she constantly erected barriers between them.
He needed to tear them down. But to do that, she had to let him close, had to trust him again. So for the moment he would give her what she thought she needed.
“Okay.”
She looked at him in confusion.
“Okay, what?”
“Okay, we’ll do it your way. We’ll keep things strictly vanilla. We’ll date and get to know one another again. I know there’s something you’re not telling me. I can’t force you to. But I will ask that you don’t lie to me.”
Laken gaped at him. Obviously she hadn’t expected that. “You can’t. Being a Dom is who you are.”
He stared at her thoughtfully. “I haven’t taken a sub since I was with you. At the club, I’ve watched, and occasionally I’ve helped out in a scene. But it all meant nothing without you.”
Although it would kill him, he was fully prepared to put his own needs aside and give her what she needed. But he knew that eventually she would be dissatisfied without his dominance. Her submissive side wouldn’t stay buried forever.
“I can only take what you choose to give me, sugar. You know that. If this is what you need in order to give me another chance, Laken, then I’ll take it and I won’t let you down. So long as there is honesty, respect and faithfulness between us, then we can work on everything else.”
Laken just stared at Duncan. Surely he didn’t mean it. Three years without taking another sub? She would never have believed it if it hadn’t come from his own lips. Duncan didn’t lie.
Could she do this? Date him? Just like a normal couple? Would she be able to hold onto her secrets around him?
This was a bad, bad idea. She was going to say no.
“Yes, I’ll go out on a date with you.” Idiot.
But the grin that lit up Duncan’s face was enough to help push her worries aside. This probably wouldn’t work.
But she simply didn’t have the strength to keep away from him.