“Because I thought I’d like it. But I didn’t enjoy what just happened. I don’t think I’m submissive.”
Jake was silent for a moment and when he took a step back she thought he was going to let her go. Then he lowered his brows.
“On your knees, sub. Now.”
No one was more shocked than Molly to find she’d slipped off the bench and onto her knees without a thought.
“What-what just happened?” She stared up at them both in confusion.
“You are submissive,” Saxon told her. “Your instincts were right about your needs. But sometimes what you think you want isn’t what you need. Under the right circumstances, you’ll submit beautifully, but you have to learn to let go. Sometimes our heads get in the way, and we need to listen to our body more. What’s your head say right now?”
“That I should get up, flip you both the bird, and storm off.”
Both men gave her stern looks. Hmm, probably not what a good submissive would say.
“Are you sure you’re being honest with yourself?” Saxon asked.
Damn him. No, she wasn’t. She looked at Jake uneasily. This wasn’t something she wanted to admit, especially in front of him.
“Molly,” Saxon warned. “I asked a question. I don’t usually have to ask twice, and you won’t like it if I do.”
She thought about challenging him, but that dark glint in his eyes told her it was probably a stupid idea. Molly was a lot of things, but stupid wasn’t one of them.
Her traitorous body wanted more but it wasn’t just a physical reaction. She liked Jake, she was attracted to him. And this was something she’d been interested in for a long time.
“I want more,” she muttered.
Saxon raised one eyebrow. “I think you thought you’d come here and maybe get an erotic little spanking. A bit of slap and tickle.”
Slap and tickle, really?
“But you never really intended to submit, did you? Anyone can give you a spanking, sweetheart. But a Dom is going to want your submission. When your experience didn’t match your expectations and you started to feel uncomfortable and upset instead of using your safeword you decided to just suffer through. Why is that?”
“Because it was my fault. He did exactly what I
asked him to.”
“So, you were still trying to control the situation. You’d withdrew into yourself where he couldn’t reach you. Now, you can run away and lick your wounds, or you can be brave and try again. But this time you need to be honest with your Dom. Tell him your true limits. If he asks you how you’re doing, you tell the truth. And if you need to, use your safeword.”
“I don’t think he’ll want to scene with me again.” She worried at her lip. Could she do this again? Could she truly let go?
“Oh, I’m not pairing you with Mark, sub.” Saxon turned to Jake. “She’s all yours. I’ll have the contract brought over.”
He walked away, leaving her gaping at his back. Then she looked up at Jake.
“He can’t just leave me to you.” She wasn’t some pawn to be given away.
“He can and he just did. But you have the option to use your safeword and leave. Are you sure you want to walk away without knowing, though? Because you could spend the rest of your life wondering what if, and, believe me, that’s no fun. This is like falling off a horse. You get back on immediately or you probably never will again.”
No, she wouldn’t be back if she left now. And the idea of playing with Jake . . . well, it both terrified and excited her. Was she brave enough to do this? No regrets!
“I’ll stay.”
“Good.” His expression didn’t change at all. Was he happy or upset? Damn stoic man. Couldn’t he show a little emotion? She started to wonder if she’d made the right choice when he gave her a smile.
“It’ll be okay, Molly. I know it’s hard to trust, but will you give it a try. For tonight?”
She licked her lips. “I do. I mean, I will. I do trust you, Jake.”