I guess I was the one who was going to have to clean it all up.
6.
I had trouble concentrating on my homework. After the scene Noah made, I couldn’t tell if I was appalled or wanted to applaud him. Either way, there was a tense energy in the house, so I decided to get out for the evening and attend a weekday mass. Clear my head and all that.
I definitely needed some quiet contemplation to sort through my feelings for Noah.
It was ridiculous. I shouldn’t have any feelings for him at all, never mind the fluttery, girlish ones I was currently experiencing. Why did he have to be so mysterious and handsome and dangerous? It was a cocktail just begging to be drunk by the likes of me.
I changed out of my uniform and into some jeans, a sleeveless flowy top and a long cardigan. Then I went downstairs and gently knocked on Sylvia’s bedroom door.
“Come in,” her small voice answered.
I ducked my head in. “I’m going to mass. Do you want to come?”
Her eyes lit up at the prospect of getting out of the house, even if it was only to go to mass. I knew she enjoyed the fresh air on the walk to and from the church, so I always invited her along.
I was wheeling her to the front door when footsteps sounded down the stairs.
“Where are you going?” Noah asked.
I turned around to face him. “We’re going to a late evening mass. Care to join us?” My invitation was mildly sarcastic. I suspected a church was the last place Noah wanted to spend time, especially after what he said about not believing in any religions.
His eyes narrowed the slightest bit as he looked from me to his mother. I noticed Sylvia’s shoulders stiffen right before Noah replied, “I’ll grab my coat.”
Well, that had backfired. Still, I wouldn’t rescind my invite. Noah had done something kind for me (in his own special way) by confronting Vee, and I was feeling quite warm towards him at the moment. I knew I shouldn’t, especially given how crazy he’d acted, but I couldn’t help it.
He returned a moment later, shrugging into his leather jacket, and we started the short walk to the church. I cast him a quick glance and saw he was already looking at me. I caught the barest hint of a smirk grace his lips before I quickly turned away.
“Where were you last night?” I asked casually.
“Working.”
My eyebrows jumped. “You have a job?”
“I bartend in the city a few nights a week. Last night things ran late, so I ended up sleeping on a friend’s couch.”
“Oh,” I said, surprised to have gotten a seemingly honest answer out of him. There was a silly part of me that wanted to find the good in Noah, probably because then I wouldn’t feel quite so guilty about my aforementioned feelings.
We walked in quiet for a minute or two, before I asked, “Remember that boy you told me about, the one who tried to bully you at school?”
Noah nodded, seeming intrigued by me bringing him up.
“That thing you said to him,” I went on in a small voice. “You only threatened, right? You didn’t actually do it?”
I saw a flicker of amusement in the curve of his mouth. “Of course, I didn’t do it. That would make me insane.” A pause as he tilted his head, thinking about it. “And a rapist. And though there are many of those in the world, I can safely say I’m not one of them.”
His attention went momentarily to Sylvia, who still seemed tense and uncomfortable in her son’s presence. Why though? Did they just have one of those distant and cold mother son relationships, or was there more to it? Vee and Sylvia weren’t very close either, despite living together in the same house. I thought it was a case of them having no other choice, and even though Vee could be cruel, she hadn’t yet resorted to the ultimate cruelty of shipping her mother off to a care home.
We reached the church just before mass began. I wheeled Sylvia to the last row, setting her chair next to the pew where I sat down. Noah moved by me, his leg brushing mine as he took a seat on the other side of me.
Father Connolly emerged in his vestments, first bowing to the ministers then venerating the altar with a kiss before incensing the altar and the cross. I took a sidelong glance at Noah and found him watching without expression. Something about his stoic profile distracted me while the parishioners stood, and I belatedly stood with them, as did Noah.
“In the name of the Father, and of the son, and of the Holy Spirit,” Father Connolly intoned before being met with the collective, “Amen.”