“But I’m not. When Nash died, I died with him.”
“That’s not true.”
“You don’t know me enough to argue otherwise.”
She was right, but Nash was dead and she was very much still alive. “Look, I never really lost anyone close to me, so I can’t imagine the anguish you’re going through nor do I want to be an arrogant jerk who advises you how to grieve.”
“Much appreciated.”
“But you’re not dead. You’re young and beautiful, and you have your entire life ahead of you. It’s waiting. You just have to wake up one day and decide to start living again.”
She looked at him with an unreadable expression. Whatever she wanted to say, something held it back. Maybe she wanted to tell him to go to hell but was simply too polite to utter the words. Or maybe he hit the nail right on the head, and she couldn’t think of any more excuses. Or maybe this was the last thing she wanted to think or talk about.
“Your name reminds me of that song.” He hummed, trying to find the beat. “It’s late September and I really should be back at school…”
Her eyes closed and her mouth formed a sad smile. “Maggie May.”
“That’s it.” His mind shuffled through forgotten lyrics and he softly sung, “Wake Up Maggie, I think I’ve got something to say to you…”
She smiled. “That’s where my name comes from. People think it’s short for Margaret, but it’s not.” The tears in her voice added a raspy edge that soothed his ears.
“Tell you what, how about later tonight we hang out. I have to work most of the day, but I shouldn’t be too late getting home.” She had an awesome firepit in her backyard. Maybe they could chill and have a fire. “I’ll bring the whiskey.” He raised the bottle in his hand.
She looked away. “Um…”
“Or not. Whatever.” Had he sounded completely desperate?
“Today’s sort of a special day. I already have plans.”
Right, because it was the anniversary. He was an idiot. She would probably be busy with family. But she also didn’t completely reject the offer.
“Rain check?”
She looked up at him and hesitated. “S—sure. I’m usually around after six, and I don’t work on the weekends.”
He wished Kelly would wrap up his art tour soon. He loved the extra money from working shifts at the bar, but his recent schedule didn’t leave him much time for anything else.
“Great. Maybe sometime this week.” He could ask one of his cousins to cover a shift.
He walked her to the exterior door and held it open. “There’s a motion sensor light that will kick on when you’re halfway down the steps.”
“Thanks. And thanks for…” She waved a hand at the empty apartment.
“Any time, neighbor.”
She smiled and it seemed as sincere as it was beautiful.
A strange fizzy sensation came over him, and he had the urge to lean down and kiss her. His head lowered and her eyes widened.
She staggered back. “What are you doing?”
Jarred by the panic in her voice, he stilled. Totally inappropriate. What was wrong with him? “I’m sorry. I just… We were talking and the lights are dim. I wasn’t really thinking about anything other than how pretty you look, and now I can see I’m only making things worse. I swear, I’m not some creeper you have to worry about. It’s just been a really long time since…” He forced his mouth to close before he totally emasculated himself. “That was really pervy of me, wasn’t it? God, men suck, don’t they? I’m totally embarrassed. I just had a temporary lapse of judgement.” He swallowed. “Please say something.”
Her mouth opened but no sound came out.
Voices from the bar below broke the silence as the door at the bottom of the stairs opened. “Ryan, are you up there?”
His spine stiffened at the sound of his mother’s voice. “That’s my mum.”
Maggie stepped onto the cement landing. “I don’t want anyone to see me.”
“Especially her,” he agreed. His mother would automatically assume something was going on if she found him up here with a woman. Footsteps sounded behind him. “You’d better go.”
She nodded and mouthed, Thanks.
“Ryan? Who left the bloody light on?”
He smiled at Maggie and hissed, “Run.”
She darted down the steps, and the back light kicked on. He shut the door just as his mother made it to the top step of the loft.
“Hey, Mum.”
“For Pete’s sake, Ryan. We asked you to go for napkins twenty minutes ago. Everyone’s down there lookin’ like a bunch of dirty vagrants. The kids have meat drippings running down their necks, especially that one with the weak chin. What the hell are you doing up here anyway?” Her eyes dropped to the bottle in his hand. “Hand it over.”
He passed her the bottle, and she twisted off the cap, tipping it back to her lips for a long sip.