‘Would you like to hold Ella?’ Maisie asked. ‘You haven’t held her yet. You’ve barely looked at her.’ She hadn’t meant to sound accusing, but she saw Antonio flinch. Maisie took a slow, even breath. ‘All I meant,’ she said carefully, ‘is that you’ve said you want to get to know her. We have an eight-hour flight ahead of us, and surely there’s no time like the present?’
Antonio glanced at Ella, his face full of a sudden, surprising uncertainty. ‘I’ve never held a baby before.’
Was he actually nervous? ‘It’s like falling off a log.’
He gave her the glimmer of a smile. ‘Somehow I doubt that.’
‘Still.’
Antonio glanced again at Ella, as if studying a problem and thinking how best to solve it. ‘How do you do it?’
‘Supporting the head is the most important thing, although not as crucial as when she was a newborn. She’s stronger and sturdier now. She won’t break.’ Gently Maisie hoisted Ella up and held her out. ‘Try?’
Antonio drew back. ‘I don’t...’
‘Please, Antonio.’ And then, because she thought he needed the encouragement, she added softly, ‘You can do this.’
Something flickered across Antonio’s face and then he held out his arms, awkwardly. Maisie handed Ella to him.
The sight of their daughter in Antonio’s arms felt strangely, surprisingly profound. Antonio cradled her easily, her head resting in the crook of his elbow as she blinked up at him with wide blue eyes so like his own.
A small, incredulous smile tugged the corner of his mouth. ‘Well, hello there, bella,’ he said softly. ‘Ciao.’
Maisie let out a little laugh, a sound of pure emotion. She felt, bizarrely, near tears. ‘You’ll have to teach her Italian.’
‘Yes,’ Antonio answered, sounding firm, even fervent. ‘I will.’
‘And me, as well.’ Too late Maisie realised they weren’t likely to have that kind of relationship. Although Antonio hadn’t laid out the specifics, she’d gathered enough from what he’d said that they would live separate lives in Milan, connected only by their daughter.
‘Yes,’ Antonio said after a second’s pause, shooting her a swift, searching glance. ‘And you.’
‘I can just get a tutor,’ she half mumbled. ‘Or do something online...’
‘Why do something online when you have someone to teach you in person?’ Antonio countered. He turned back to Ella, his whole countenance softening. Ella blinked up at him, looking serious in a way only babies could look, and then, quite suddenly, a smile burst across her face like a rainbow, and she let out a gurgle, the sound one of pure joy.
Antonio
blinked, seeming stunned, and then an answering smile bloomed across his face and he pressed a kiss to his daughter’s forehead.
Maisie looked away, blinking back tears. She hadn’t expected to be so emotionally affected by the sight of Antonio with Ella. His daughter. Their daughter. For better or worse they were a family. The doubts that had been plaguing her mind like a flock of black crows started to disperse. It was the right decision to come to Milan. And maybe, just maybe, it would all work out well. If she worked at it. If they both did.
A few minutes later Ella started to fuss, and Maisie took her back from Antonio for a feed.
‘That’s something I can’t do,’ he remarked wryly, and Maisie blushed, feeling exposed despite the blanket draped across her shoulder, hiding Ella and her unbuttoned shirt from view. This all felt so strange and intimate, and yet weirdly right too. It made everything inside her feel jangled and mixed up.
‘So tell me about Milan,’ she said as Ella relaxed against her. ‘I’ve never been to Europe or anywhere, really.’
‘Where did you grow up?’
‘Upstate New York. I only moved to the city for school.’
‘And Max?’
‘He went to Cornell, and lived at home to save money. When he got the internship in the city, it seemed meant to be.’ She smiled, the curve of her lips touched with sadness. ‘But I know you were right. He needs his freedom. It’s good for him that I’m going, even if it’s only for six months.’
Antonio’s dark, straight brows drew together. ‘I hope it’s not only for six months.’
‘Trial period, remember?’ Maisie tried to speak lightly.