“I thought you were going to wash the dishes?” Cy asked, coming in the kitchen door. He had three grocery bags in his hands, Lucas following carrying a few more. They sat them on the counter. I’d remained behind on the ranch when they went on a food run.
“Sorry,” I said, joining them. “I forgot.”
Cy gave me a look, one that said he wasn’t pleased. Trying to get skunk smell off had bonded us. How was crazy, definitely, but we’d had a trauma, albeit a ridiculous one, and we’d survived together. He’d helped scrub my hair—over and over again—even though he’d reeked as well. He’d taken care of me, proven he’d be there for me in the worst of times.
It felt incredible, but that was dangerous. Everything that was exhilarating was also dangerous. I knew that first hand.
Since the skunk fiasco, he’d been sweet. Caring. Like Lucas. We’d had sex, countless times, but it had changed. It wasn’t like the first days where he’d been bossy and dominant, spanking me and tying me up. When we’d been in the hot tub—and before the stupid skunk had ruined it all—Cy had ordered me into his bedroom to dominate me.
That had never happened, and not in the days since. No, he was sweet. Never talked dirty, never even spanked me. They never took me together, never mentioned fucking me at the same time like they had originally. They gave me orgasm after orgasm, but it wasn’t enough.
I loved the attention, but it wasn’t what I needed. God, what was wrong with me? Two men fucking me and I wasn’t happy. Just as I’d thought, I was destroying something before it even started. It was better this way. It was supposed to be fun. No heart involved.
I turned on the water on one side of the split sink, grabbed a dirty breakfast dish from the other side and rinsed it. Opening the dishwasher, I bent down to put it in, keeping my ass out. I had two virile men putting groceries away and they could have a show. I wasn’t naked, but they could take the hint. Give me what I wanted. Just fun. Just… mindless sex.
Hopefully.
Rinsing another dish, I did it again. And again, wiggling my ass as I did so.
Lucas came up behind me, set his palm on my butt. “I like this.”
Looking over my shoulder at him, I grinned. “It’s yours for the taking.”
What more invitation could I give him? I didn’t want their kindness, their concern. I wanted their rough hands, their wildness.
He winked. “Let’s go to Cy’s room.”
“No.” Cy’s voice was like a whip cracking. He leaned against the counter, arms crossed. “She doesn’t get our dicks.”
“What?” I sputtered. “Why not?”
“You’ve been a bad girl.”
“Because I didn’t do the dishes?” I asked, stunned.
“That, and the fact that you didn’t call your parents back yesterday. Did you?”
My cheeks flamed, knowing he was right. They’d left a message, and I had yet to call them.
“No.”
“Other things, too.” He stroked his beard.
There had been other things. I’d left wet towels on the floor. Stupid shit that was ridiculous, just to get a rise out of Cy. To get him to do something besides kiss me on t
he head and love me. Yeah, love. I didn’t want the love.
I wanted the fun. The fucking. Nothing else. That was fun. Safe.
And so, I lashed out. Acted out so they’d have to give it to me. I grabbed another dish, rinsed it and put it in the dishwasher with the others.
“Sweetheart, if you wanted a spanking, all you had to do was say it.”
My head whipped up, met his dark gaze. “What?”
“You need to be taken in hand, don’t you?”
“I—”