I find myself in the closet, looking at the space I once shared. It’s bare, with the exception of the gowns I left behind and a brand-new one hanging alongside them. The black silk dress feels like heaven between my fingers, but the pang of jealousy that is rushing through my body feels worse. This isn’t my dress. He’s bought it for someone else.
Before I realize what I’m doing, I open the bathroom door and find him leaning over the sink with shaving cream and a razor in his hand. A towel covers his waist, but that does nothing to combat the desire pooling within. I swallow the lump in my throat and meet his gaze in the mirror. He smiles, making my knees even weaker than they were seconds ago.
“You’re going out?”
He rinses his razor in the running water as he answers. “Yes, I have a fundraiser.”
So many thoughts rush through my mind: him dancing with his date, touching her softly and holding her to his body. I want it to be me. I want to be the one he chooses to spend his time with.
“The dress you chose for her, it’s beautiful.”
“She’s beautiful,” he says, breaking my heart even more. I smile softly and take a step back from the door. “Macey?” He calls my name, causing me to look back at him. “Come here.”
I do as he says because I’m weak and in love with him. Finn wipes his face clean of the shaving cream and turns to lean against the counter. The towel does nothing to hide the thickness or the ridges of his manhood.
“The dress is for you,” he says, reaching for me. I step to him willingly and relish the feel of his hands on my hips.
“For me?”
“Of course. Who else would it be for?” The way he says this, as if it’s no big deal, sends shock waves to my heart, feelings that I know I should ignore and not think twice about because next week it’ll be someone new going with him or having her dress hanging in his closet.
“What about Morgan?”
“Lamar will come stay with her. We won’t be out long, just enough time to shake a few hands, eat and maybe take a spin on the dance floor.”
I think about Morgan and Lamar, and the mother in me doesn’t want to leave Morgan alone. Not that I don’t trust Lamar, I do, but this is Morgan’s first night in a strange place and as much as she loves her room, coming down the stairs to ask a man for help, a man she barely knows, could be frightening for her.
“I can’t go,” I tell him, only to see his face fall. Instantly, I pick up the washcloth that he was using and continue to wipe away the residual shaving cream that he missed. He pulls me forward, bringing me in between his legs and gripping my ass fully with his hands.
“Why?”
“Because it’s Morgan’s first night here. I don’t feel comfortable leaving her.”
He sighs and leans his forehead against my chest. “I have to go,” he says and I nod.
“I know. We’ll be fine.”
“Will you wait up for me?” he asks, meeting my gaze once again.
“Of course.”
My brain tells me that I need to tell him no, but my heart is screaming yes, yelling at me to tell him that he can sleep in his bed with me. I need to be strong, though, and stand my ground. I can’t give in to the ways of Finn McCormick and his come-hither eyes. I’m only going to continue hurting myself if I don’t stop.
Morgan calls my name and I immediately leave the comfort of Finn’s arms. As much as I want to look back at him, I don’t. Instead, I hurry away, committing the sight of him to memory as I go to Morgan.
“Hey,” I say to her, stepping out of Finn’s room.
“What were you doing?”
“Talking to Finn.” I direct her toward the living room where his giant television is hoisted up on the wall. We sit together on the couch as I turn it on and try to find something that will interest her.
“You can call him my dad, ya know.”
“I know.”
It didn’t take Morgan long to start referring to Finn as her dad. The first time she said it, my heart dropped because I knew I was now sharing her with someone else, but at the same time I felt thankful that she now has him in her life.
“It’s hard sometimes.”
“What’s hard?” Finn asks from behind us. Morgan and I turn at the same time to see him only a few feet from us, dressed to knock the socks off some unsuspecting woman in his black tuxedo.
“Whoa, Dad, where are you going?”
“I have to run out to a party for a bit. I won’t be gone long.” Finn comes around the front of the couch, pausing in front of me. “Can you help me?” he asks, holding the ends of his untied bow tie.