“I just …” sob, “wasn’t thinking. I found the … the gun, and the next thing I knew, it was in my hand, and I just … went for it.”
Fuck. Kairo and his stupid fucking guns. They’re all over the place. He wanted me to be prepared, not knowing what kind of bullshit was going to rain down over me, but just how many fucking guns did he stash in here? I’ve already got the one from the cupboard and from behind the couch. Now, this? How many more do I need to know about? There’s already a whole fucking stash out in the warehouse.
“It’s okay,” I tell her, my hand roaming up and down her back as I stare up at the ceiling for the second time tonight, only this time it’s as I catch my breath after my whole fucking life flashed before my eyes.
Roni shakes her head against my chest. “It’s not okay,” she insists, her sobs still coming in hard and fast. “I tried to kill you. Kill, Nic. This isn’t just some stupid game. I nearly took your life, and I’m so fucking tired that I didn’t even think about it. Just pointed and shot.” She grabs my shirt and attempts to wipe her eyes. “I mean, fuck. I was in love with you for fucking years. What kind of person does that? Who shoots a man they were in love with? I’m a monster, and now you’re going to kill me because I almost put a bullet through your head.”
“Baby,” I laugh, pulling her in tighter and absolutely loving the feel of having her in my arms again. I mean, yeah, she’s been in my arms plenty of times over the past twelve hours but she was either passed out or desperately trying to get away, so they don’t count. Right now, though, she’s here, letting me hold her and seeking out my comfort, and that means more than she'll ever know. “I could never kill you, Roni. Not even if you put that bullet through my head, but that doesn’t mean your bullshit isn’t going to go unpunished.”
Her eyes go wide, and she raises onto her elbow to look down at me. Fear takes over as she searches my eyes for some kind of answer. “No,” she begs. “Whatever it is, don’t make me do it. I swear I won’t try and hurt you again. I was just … so tired. I wanted to go home, back to my life, and pretend that none of this ever happened.”
I pull her back to me, and she comes without hesitation. “That’s not going to happen,” I tell her. “Try it again, though, and your sweet ass will be locked in chains. Is that clear?”
Roni nods, her eyes coming back to meet mine. “What are you going to do to me?” she questions, her hand falling back to my chest and her fingers tangling into the fabric of my shirt just like she used to do back in high school. Memories of all our good times together fly through my mind, and while I know I did things in a twisted way, I know I’m right. She needs to be here with me.
I shake my head, bringing my hand down to her face and running my knuckles over her porcelain skin. She leans into my touch, and her eyes flutter with need. “Sleep, Roni,” I tell her, unable to get the vision of her standing above me with that gun out of my head. “We can discuss it in the morning.”
She falls silent beside me, and I wonder if she’s plotting her escape when her breathing softens, and she becomes heavy in my arms, finally falling into a deep sleep. I pull her in tighter and she instantly snuggles into me, her leg hitching high over my hip.
My hand falls to her thigh, and as I bask in the feel of her body against mine for the first time in years, I realize that while she may hate every little thing about me, she still trusts me to keep her safe. A woman who didn’t would never fall asleep in the arms of a killer, it’s just common sense, but Roni … she’s different. She's strong, fierce, and has the potential to rule it all. She just has to figure it out.
Feeling content for the first time in over ten years, I finally close my eyes and let unconsciousness claim me. Tomorrow, things are going to be different.
My body wakes me at the crack of dawn, just as it’s been trained to do during my time in prison. It takes me a moment to remember that I’m not back there, and from here on out, things are going to change.
Roni stirs in my arms, and I glance down at her. I’ve woken up beside many women, but never have any looked so damn peaceful. If only she knew what kind of power she holds over me. She always has, and I’m sick of holding it back.